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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。; P! g) I& C; s8 M- }
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)& ?# K3 }3 K2 o% G
Holmes: I just picked it up.
) |$ p' K0 m  S9 |+ g5 }' kWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)7 |9 o2 r3 _8 _5 {% y
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.( A% o. O) L6 z
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
3 x4 ?0 N4 \6 SHolmes: You did.
0 B2 Q- t" G: n# S. A. |0 I5 {(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
+ N9 Y/ V) Q: _/ @Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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  W: S6 G3 C- O& `+ _宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。# I+ C6 a( V# E, `4 ?6 z6 g. I
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.! d# X) a6 E7 [: q' B; f! c( Z: D
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。9 a; L: F! l% k* E$ A  N% N9 J
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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- s+ x' A/ r& K, a0 Y拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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" Z9 p7 V9 h! g' GWatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。4 }* y$ g3 e9 q
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。9 S* |( _2 a$ I/ U- E- g
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes7 O9 J( N1 @8 ~  u3 i, g, [( }
Irene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)6 Y8 a  z; }5 d6 ]' s( A  R4 B, c
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
5 u3 Y7 t2 L- L( r- n2 aHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)
; B* w# S& ^$ [/ ~8 O4 @/ z2 jIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。
# a, y" E4 Q% `8 H2 p* L# i- kHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
# G0 M3 j& n' m8 Z" s) ]; ~  _* dWatson: Get that out of my face.
+ q$ C  v  @/ p& b( S, {; zHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
9 r! v. h: u1 X. q( @2 F* eWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.$ g0 X5 l  f4 b
路人警官Clarky上场。0 R$ n2 a% h# W& \& I9 ^
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
6 O7 D! M. W' R: aHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)" }$ S2 Q: d) s3 }, j  q# Z% l8 F
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。% ~6 f4 P6 a8 F  ^' F
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
: M( V, d5 F( zHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.' i5 D- f# Q+ s, E, ^- t6 i
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墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。( p, I; }5 U, x8 l% k
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)/ d' J7 z- C% p4 g7 E. W8 }" o
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.+ Y6 x7 M' [# d# ~+ ?/ ~
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)4 `) C( `1 n4 Q2 e
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。- b' M2 ?8 U" q
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
- a" Q! }( D, l: W1 k, V* @Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
4 G4 t5 o( x/ b  l+ ~1 a" DWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)9 s2 g& ?$ f1 L1 U/ b% ~
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
$ j( @, v: g1 U+ b9 k, KHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。); K" ?+ Q  X, ~3 K$ d- v( F
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
1 a& t1 e# k) H& s5 |Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
5 `; ^' e7 d* W6 _7 I8 `/ V8 d/ I/ oLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.3 e9 s% ]7 }) n) d, \- U
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0 [% R- H; l; F% n3 E5 o/ F; R接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
" U- Y- l& `5 j9 i5 Q/ X8 M7 T话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。1 X$ }. N3 y) M; C, E" h
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)3 l& p5 {0 G) o1 V
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
1 p' L+ V: l% ~2 n& OHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)
, T& D9 X3 l4 s3 d. q- Z! y8 {Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
* A! O% b' u# E. T9 q' [Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
/ }6 v% @) w, S  c" U, F$ @Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)/ v) p& l$ S+ T  K* \8 A0 J
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
. ~# I% M$ L! ?; sHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)$ q, m0 U% ^* t9 i
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
4 D) k' C5 ~+ X9 o. L. W! ~Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
& t) I' n+ n6 e+ w$ H, [WatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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  d; ~* \/ t  t; J5 v总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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