 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
2 V9 X3 {3 `$ B2 _Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) X" p9 R3 v! ^3 S/ w4 q$ _
Holmes: I just picked it up., q2 D" x9 I0 V& M* M
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
4 Y" i- t6 S' D) W- kHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
6 j0 L3 V0 o- b+ l! S5 S+ tWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) , W, M/ g$ _3 Y3 [( y
Holmes: You did.1 t( t( \3 L7 n
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
# C- G2 o* u0 j* dHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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( z) f+ o4 P, z3 n" i宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ( I+ K2 p: w3 c: n5 C; V
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.5 i0 N/ S& r3 e- w2 ?$ S
Holmes: Granted.' G' ^2 p B6 {* B
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 7 S! _" J. l t; [ F* \8 _
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) $ Z3 K; F; O& v; s$ A- `3 v& Y
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 1 x& h E# v1 C- L
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$ @8 T% W, N. T0 U- QWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 / P% v: Y( t. \5 |, H2 K
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) r: J& k( j) J% U+ Q6 V# z& d
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 + w D, o( T0 v% ^& Q& [' Z
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; W* g$ o. O+ o6 Q6 R1 EBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
% w3 K4 L A, J, C {% B( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ) [, ?, J: Y) b( I
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?9 i8 j. p/ r0 N( O6 H
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) # g; G1 L6 s/ l. I3 Q/ d; d& a
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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4 l+ p) h* D; a3 kIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 2 n. Y: C8 F6 P( o y
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) & _; \2 c4 m5 x. Y4 T% A) N
Watson: Get that out of my face.
3 V! r6 B! r) J1 O+ f6 k8 M, GHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
! R O! B! I5 V F. PWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
8 s7 o3 J( I; H' x. W$ q9 H路人警官 Clarky上场。
- ^ ]7 y3 B# v3 o. N& U3 pClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
; G+ m% x" f$ R5 \) r" l8 V! ]6 pHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) ) M+ S! ?( d+ v. `! b! R+ m
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
1 X3 R5 y* Z- M/ A6 XWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?# R8 G. B6 f8 y3 g j& H& Y+ u
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
" Q& G5 z6 c. @1 F/ X( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
$ d) ]7 |$ E/ D# c) FHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
) ^0 ? [& m6 }) ]. GWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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/ U1 ^' V* M# _. ?河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
7 U# _- Z4 I9 A: |) K, yHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ) q5 |6 j3 ]" l3 u- O0 R+ u
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
- S1 u0 x1 P, n+ T3 N, J% kWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
8 ?- d' j# f% }% {2 x死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 : i# e4 O0 {2 l+ K6 y/ s
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 4 B/ F8 m9 {8 @2 l
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
! z$ u0 g' x! {7 B' d0 H6 ^Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 ! H: ?" T( S: C m& A1 s4 t
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 3 r0 i( H. h) q5 p# I7 m
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
6 f3 l! y7 J" g, R% jHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
3 G% ], }9 r& RWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) # R( y* g- b W! O4 U/ o
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
b9 W& I$ G2 V" RMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
2 B' H0 m% L' E4 `Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ; ^+ k+ w x) x! @) [2 M# n7 U
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 5 l+ [$ i S* X9 _8 i3 n7 I
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
% ~4 a5 J3 e, A+ H X3 }5 y, R7 i* eHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) $ }( T+ i P9 c* Y! a# h, \
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
, m) A8 a( h* p1 r; d+ c/ L5 zMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
" D# m& _7 h9 N0 h6 p1 F( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) / w) s4 K& l; z+ r8 Q' f% C
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+ w# m9 R. b# b$ L总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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