 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
" n% a$ D& c" k* k! iWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 9 C5 a' Q; d: d, h
Holmes: I just picked it up.: k B$ ?$ G) u6 v( e. L- f
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
& O% |0 t8 J, B6 U* {3 ~. l+ aHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
; b' R& S, [( [& MWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
9 n& c* O4 A( b9 C0 o- uHolmes: You did.3 N% S" g7 j; B# E8 @( U: u* m& ~
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
; |$ V: k8 `% {9 c" E% C3 mHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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{2 c$ h0 }! A" {, X- f- ?宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ( D a, R/ i G2 D
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
$ X) Z/ z' D$ W# tHolmes: Granted. h N; B4 w( g( a
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! Y! f' ]7 p- H# t" Q4 a晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
2 i( Z; p. m. Z' tWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 2 r, p. K* b* }9 O, s4 [
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 9 d4 n& e% y* K5 \$ l& G
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( y8 i2 X* o* r6 iHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 % q6 K) W/ d& D0 V
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
/ M8 _/ ?# ?5 ]1 G& C" bIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
& U! ^) r; p" UHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 9 R+ K! W9 g3 L
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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7 u4 x* H9 t4 ?: [- TIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
/ d7 d/ `( a$ L; k+ X$ o: b. Y ?7 jHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ! I2 V! X7 f: _' l {1 k
Watson: Get that out of my face.+ q5 B: [& I# _) [$ j/ G
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
9 L. L: w9 g, _+ kWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
1 h# U# b3 Y+ N9 X/ h路人警官 Clarky上场。
$ @8 ^( b: l2 E6 d; e9 v' _Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
. u. r1 E+ ~1 V4 HHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) f8 H& e* A W4 }' g
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
" h8 H) h. K# \) P2 X; Z% K+ I! FWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
# K. r' f5 } n2 c4 ]+ |8 SHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not./ V f$ w+ Z& A$ e( k3 _4 {4 a
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 $ H% E" P/ B3 m" i4 ~
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) ) |% H- p8 E6 z! f
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.' y9 I& W6 n9 \- o9 n
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 5 H$ |1 I- d& w/ |# J: b* s5 z. q$ i
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6 N3 M) A9 J" B7 c& a" I河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
8 O. I0 r3 I5 `2 H8 l# tHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
/ u2 f% ~1 q& H( P3 O+ j3 @* XBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
" O! n' M+ }7 S. b. D1 G sWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
# x2 T" @( Y! n3 z1 d: c死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 i) R% e; |: ]; q! v% |$ l3 y
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
$ _2 a' N& u L5 n后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
6 O2 R7 {) j: e" h. B/ g: ?Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 : {0 T! @- H3 e; J6 D& k( h
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing., x6 H1 ?! F0 ~7 ]; K6 Y( m
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
- ]5 H/ @9 {5 t6 m话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
: e j* G5 @5 E* C, }Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
( p, C8 X! s* I+ D- O8 W& ~# [Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
0 |# o3 B' p1 B% s7 @6 }Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
; g: c1 P' d( `Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?" v5 J+ c T2 B, T! |, m
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
+ L+ P2 t3 d4 y0 C2 Z! z, RHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) : M& X5 I, b" E1 A% w0 \- ~ j
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) , \/ |. Y) |. `2 R1 V
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
3 ?( _# V' ~4 h/ y S5 D- ?# M/ qWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) / P# Q f# D8 s' `3 l- {
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) + y0 p. i9 B0 O7 K/ p' }3 D
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 2 M) E2 | }2 x7 X- F
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1 f1 R6 t/ N! J1 o总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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