 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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$ Z5 e7 n7 A8 u8 X5 C; a影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 - R( \: K0 {7 ~/ O9 l
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
7 }$ V7 ~* m& b+ f% d6 {9 R9 xHolmes: I just picked it up.
u9 x% r: L4 S3 ^0 [* [! nWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
& E! K# B C6 H% I+ m7 NHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
: h- G2 m, v7 ^2 ~Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
- C* y" [0 ~. gHolmes: You did.0 |5 W7 I; E9 s
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
+ {7 L) `! Z9 @* o8 x& {& L/ T- [Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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" M! N, M. H2 |8 g4 J宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
" ?4 T) ?' q0 z1 z2 f) r# b/ kWatson: Permission to enter the armory.- \2 A% v+ o& b2 C: ]
Holmes: Granted., h- U( @* i4 g# b7 l
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
6 E# \0 {) a" x, a5 j: ^Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
# C* H& b8 s0 `+ g0 K7 O9 k; WWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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# r. {3 X* u. S) j5 R5 O% hHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 * X! p E$ e5 \
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' a& y6 S' ~, h6 B& pBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
4 ?1 U1 N z. S @ S1 Z& m( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) + |2 \, w, B) T. a5 [2 N5 J
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?, m2 @8 r+ w# |' }* x3 I( b" G
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) $ o' R; |/ I' _. b* f7 S
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.3 ~9 l) g/ w/ k/ W8 S6 s
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9 ?* Q$ S$ m; q5 S C- sIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 & g: Z5 X2 f/ F
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
+ k, ?4 s' C X/ |' OWatson: Get that out of my face.
5 c2 P5 y7 k- f/ ^Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
7 B3 U: S( z4 J" iWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
& s& ?8 q* T% |4 L9 V& b路人警官 Clarky上场。 8 \& T& c, ?- N2 u' z3 c4 y
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.5 ~/ b, R) Z- m) H6 G
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 1 t( [( }" ?6 p6 C5 \" _! B) `
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
2 G# t: q8 W" rWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
3 v; @9 v9 l2 D w' LHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 # h/ Q: N7 X; G8 j
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 4 b. ]+ D0 M6 p. p
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
1 K% N( p0 S8 Y) ?& ZWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 8 b6 U& w1 { X
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
3 k( |& c- ^ H2 n1 z. b5 qBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…9 y" q, h2 W: H l! Z
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 9 {6 V% |) B$ z! s8 V9 M
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
5 x. J( y) A7 H u) jHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) # h& y6 y% C. v- k' z; j0 U/ p
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
. I" V6 G/ S2 o: q/ HHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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! S s7 Z1 O4 u; Z5 |警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
1 m+ b8 c: Z' |, k' Y4 {+ x2 QLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.3 f8 T% {+ C1 p0 {$ K3 D+ m
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 4 D7 u' \, F! D" q1 d# [ c
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
8 u! o. U1 f: y# a# @' hHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) % w/ `' s" X9 g$ @. m, t% t" v; ^
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
( J( c4 }2 M7 T. V( WHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
2 U/ z S* s' W+ G8 }Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?2 F/ n' F( O& ?
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
- e( L1 _) l6 CHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) $ t8 ~ w+ c# e# |: d7 N. x+ @6 G
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) : y2 L+ Y% N* ]0 v
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 2 N. @# u1 F0 m. l" ]& k7 c
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
# E) {1 `. T6 W! y+ b- ^Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 5 P8 C# m. H& ]- z0 ~& I- C
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 2 D7 l/ J# r/ e' [% g; _5 U
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" L( V8 H% w7 [+ M总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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