 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ! f8 W& J: x) T: v3 p, ?
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+ ^ b$ [, ^5 N6 P' N/ Z! A3 c* m影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 : Y6 k" r7 Y. u" v) K: ^" @9 f
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
! s+ i1 a0 P1 X3 aHolmes: I just picked it up.
1 S6 g% K y7 P0 Y' \Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) % @6 H# o4 e$ S2 T
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
5 A3 d% O0 \9 O; a. ?Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
, }' N1 c5 D4 T3 }0 v- WHolmes: You did.
0 y9 A+ M1 a4 y& ~(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
0 _' P1 y1 K9 {Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.7 b% |1 b4 @+ q. C l
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
l. [3 |7 G: d2 f$ l+ J9 C4 A; jWatson: Permission to enter the armory.8 t' |( Y# ?8 p& h
Holmes: Granted.
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( k+ W% s% t: ]" L1 P. y/ o* J晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
! d! K6 Q6 Z& A6 ?; yWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) ' j. z; x; m0 H, ~. |- z) H
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 % h4 t9 t1 Q8 m4 k! |
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0 I- B: I4 n* J6 I/ oWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 5 k3 i4 [0 y6 @% q3 F: @, A ~# o6 d
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) # O& h4 G# E2 e* Q, h7 z
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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: w$ O! z* }- R( t5 j; P/ G8 FBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 - E$ S4 ^) B F) x
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 1 v! r' e% A: a5 }
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ; o$ {! j' U6 @& q/ X5 j( q+ u
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
. d! M. @% o9 _Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ! |& _3 }6 g# c9 T! Q6 n
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.# |( h2 M4 J5 }; E8 H* t2 _
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 8 M* x7 C9 [ c$ ], q) W
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) / K. H* n' Z; n8 X4 A1 J7 [
Watson: Get that out of my face.% b% D+ v( C0 B& o. x- N1 s
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
7 A# Z' y- J: ~Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.& Z6 b) \' p' U
路人警官 Clarky上场。 5 U3 u! `) a% L( g$ q
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
- Z2 \5 q" _3 J: D/ fHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) $ }: u- v, E4 N8 C% ]+ P. v
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 5 K8 e4 _) ?- }3 c4 Q$ H
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
4 M) `$ N8 _* c# m9 {1 p: NHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
- v6 C8 Z! c3 g/ g8 B6 t( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
X1 N1 }# L2 x% yHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.$ c) n. b& \: ]& A; m" Q
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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( m6 b5 t0 H/ n N0 \, i" V/ p. o河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
0 c" y F; N9 u( x( ^* L0 sHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
& ]# O& E4 R4 V. W ^& @, G kBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
$ V' k, E6 D ^. BWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
: I, m( p0 U# G% \* g死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
3 X+ y/ e, v8 X& ^! @( ]Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
a" z+ [3 U# m' S2 k8 z后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 , B* t( _8 j0 z! S- X
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 1 p( B/ {* K- T G# `" x
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& r: j# W0 |1 S9 K) X$ H警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 3 e9 a6 Y& W5 }' I
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.# _' `5 F" p% [6 t9 B" b; L2 |
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
3 t. m' x( ~$ s$ K: F$ e' H话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
5 {; t7 K2 h/ {" l7 l4 `! bHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 0 ]$ P; p$ _# K
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) ( x) c+ ^$ H1 Y9 f/ y
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
* ?; R' Q% y" M$ ~8 VMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
! p) |6 f) K5 o% j, i1 C: `Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
6 s% j; w6 }0 E y* J( d, D( C6 ZHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) " j; f0 e/ w5 W$ G, b
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
0 ?1 N7 E3 E/ g1 f' j1 V' XHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) % q2 T4 U/ U/ z* B' p {9 \5 ~0 G
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
, v5 z9 n" J- w, K2 y. U) uMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
, f+ q) _2 u7 o I! H5 F1 K( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) - S( o" t8 L& W8 R( f( k
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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