 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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. X+ {/ h/ M5 J# o: H, @影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
* H1 A8 S @: h' X( ~Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) : n3 A; h4 ?/ b4 Z
Holmes: I just picked it up.
8 ?1 e! z+ h3 Z- I2 m3 C7 G& @Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
9 y/ B/ i* I6 q1 z7 w9 I/ a6 l4 a }Holmes: Knew I forgot something.+ K/ T9 N. A/ E: S
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
2 ^3 y4 e% i6 [4 b! l% FHolmes: You did.
- P% A+ i7 z% `7 l(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
1 s( [5 u" O/ MHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.6 j- ?; R: I, f9 v F: \8 y2 o: W
2.
( B# q+ k4 ^" m' H. F/ O宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
; p$ g* B" a; j' {+ T0 CWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
3 ]$ G. A& }" i; c! T! ^Holmes: Granted.- J" @, g7 L4 S% d0 G) d3 G% [6 K
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
2 L( \& t6 @( A4 a% O0 t2 H8 P3 @1 AWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 2 `* z( d; C a, a
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 9 b3 }$ q8 n3 S- g. M7 q+ F
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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8 [2 T! T" Z! C# bBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 % Z+ P7 D+ d( G3 _+ o: o
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) @; Z; P1 \5 \& j+ GIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
9 L. z( {9 I S* t1 a; W7 s: ?( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
2 e% i2 x% M6 e4 h4 h% d% NIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?9 b/ y ?) I9 G/ C; w! @
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) + I* @" [/ J) w' D! k
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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/ Z0 A% U3 a6 J9 B6 X7 @3 C. I, A6 NIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
7 p/ a0 H; g$ j- X& W, v( O" EHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ; f/ Z: M+ i2 ?8 ~: [
Watson: Get that out of my face.
+ ^; E% Z6 n& S) ]+ VHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.7 z( Y4 {. C7 ^3 E
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face., s2 C+ w8 S: |( }9 s0 K n
路人警官 Clarky上场。
* s0 M) I, B. YClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
3 v S6 U, _+ L( c. L# ?9 l. jHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) , [9 x+ Q/ J, B0 C- B, J/ y6 B
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 # f4 K1 M: h7 d; j! c+ Q
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
9 S: w' @, d" ^7 o$ j& |* a1 |Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.2 Y2 r: C' q. \0 }
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
4 n: h2 s& J6 Z. B( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
/ e3 f5 i( |/ m5 c8 K' u! T9 mHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
2 n2 `- _+ N2 I' |( i/ FWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 ' r# E7 L: j4 }' Y3 z) z
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ! T# N% @) F) f. J# u" I
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
, ^. n! P' Q9 w' m2 AWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
3 y. v/ k" b4 F4 D& v死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
$ r5 l( g6 G% B# H# g+ lHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) $ j( N; O2 @, |: R$ |2 o, o& d
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
7 q$ } x, q) w. m- M5 sHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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4 c' R3 z3 s* E+ w; E6 Q j警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
c- G+ q" z& Q9 qLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing. ?/ d. r! G5 K, [
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
5 r5 I8 V; j+ F( \% R$ H话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 " D# b% _- ^ R
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) # `" F) r; H b4 K- P
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 6 A" ^* ]! u- r# Q8 z$ n: s
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) 7 ]7 _' Q2 I P7 W' O$ v& D
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?( u4 @# J0 ~& ]; c( p+ Y
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) $ @' L* j! [6 ]) X
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) - R2 d! }% B: v+ F5 Z- v
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) # }: O3 h4 V2 q* [2 A, m, P& O
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 3 ?, m, B3 t. k) e- B
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) & m4 P, J1 g: Q% C' Q
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) # ` R3 i5 t! i# f8 i) ]% T
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) & g& A7 Q) l) Y0 T$ ~
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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