 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
7 b; z) `0 V$ o: G: O( ~Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 7 ~' z# q3 S/ N
Holmes: I just picked it up.
( B7 \8 ?- i3 }" k4 DWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
, T- P. J9 E# q/ } B6 mHolmes: Knew I forgot something./ A% s" L2 e4 S% S9 ?) H
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
8 t: w# N" d) A0 b' C( m5 b) |% w/ _Holmes: You did.
+ ^" V) H; X8 i" Z(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
9 K9 U |% C( v6 R( iHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 . [: G9 b1 | m/ ?
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.3 E$ n" r( t$ m: N4 L8 M
Holmes: Granted.
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0 u# D0 U8 U3 v: w% F* Y% Q晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
o2 v! Q' A4 Q0 c. AWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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% H' B+ X q. r! d7 ~拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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7 b" y1 _- U# k7 B+ iWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 ) b$ h( l9 o$ x# b" z g( O5 f
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 $ F- O" |5 V$ z2 {
7.
! b+ p5 G5 d3 CBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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* a/ z# O$ ~6 Q: JIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
) z! \2 }" _. S7 U# `" x7 c( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ( j# ^$ J& L: H" n& s' J
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
7 x# T3 _$ w( n5 F' L" u) JHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 3 ~5 D6 g5 ]% ]; l
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
% s! ?" t' f; iHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
5 [0 t: R8 m+ V9 R2 dWatson: Get that out of my face.2 X& m1 \0 ]. S3 c1 D: j% E/ z: k' A0 E
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
+ j9 g4 @7 p9 I' oWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
9 }" R4 P i) @& S% I3 D7 ^( n路人警官 Clarky上场。 ; o9 \) i! y0 _# X( ^* i* T
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.) n: ]0 Y1 t/ N1 y
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
$ O6 Z/ i' j9 U: F2 @* P" t得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ; Q! Y c* C: O2 j; D
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?' }4 M' n+ e( J9 Z4 j8 q$ M) w
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.2 R. U6 a J$ Q
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& y3 T/ {/ D$ j1 q2 a8 ~1 C" V2 {墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 9 j1 E0 m0 W. e3 F0 a4 \* B% z
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) ' U* D3 @/ B; r% \/ ^
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely., V) h7 M' b5 r' M0 l$ |
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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% z+ N% r# I6 X# m$ d1 X* _' u河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 3 [$ u5 Q: t7 u$ z; L5 T: M, m
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 7 k0 O |" e7 O3 i
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…6 }* @$ B4 }$ Y9 W9 M
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
% m9 Z' l0 O: A1 t: p/ I# u死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 4 N/ W; }; \; J9 [7 v5 q+ v
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
4 `! ?# N/ V8 \" I3 b' Z后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 4 e8 U6 ]+ i c- F2 t$ Z4 ^6 |- I
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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6 h( p. @* f0 @- M警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
6 Y2 D9 N) K+ u: Q+ CLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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% z' C8 F; o( t Q1 X3 v$ E接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
9 ^! c1 ]! k& {3 y2 z: m* ~) Z话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 . [8 C4 e6 {; M
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
2 Y+ ^% O) L8 XWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 0 P6 a( w( n- R3 i
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
' `* h: t7 h2 L8 Y7 v! P' l0 DMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
1 @% S, F' T' ^- I+ \Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
; U, l0 q Z( Q, X! XHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 2 w, K6 B6 D+ U0 o0 d3 V$ c
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) & [# I" y2 ^8 `5 h0 }2 A" R& i1 g1 B
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 4 s \+ ~9 I$ T6 w" |1 k
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
' n. k; X5 ]6 ?5 iMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 2 s0 F9 f6 u$ P8 i; t4 O
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) & Y' A* r/ V ~, i, c
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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