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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay# X4 O7 j: d( j& _# C! }
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5 j4 J; j0 ?, |6 \$ g5 q+ \- L影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。& W" W4 n7 X% t! S  _/ y
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。). E; O7 m- w0 T- t& s, Q
Holmes: I just picked it up." Z# U. j% H+ i
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)) q! j" k; b1 i$ }. v
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.3 t5 ]$ T4 Z0 T- w3 Y0 A+ q* @* p+ N
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
& L1 A" r- A" R4 R. DHolmes: You did.3 q7 e; A; G! Y
(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)# r2 |  t7 e5 w* @$ l
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.9 j  J8 |) S; B7 E$ L
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) h( N0 a- `& Y5 K1 U宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。
5 v' a! `- f( G4 P. w4 T$ L8 u: IWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
8 \7 ~: O/ ^5 K& ~0 iHolmes: Granted.4 q; i) L* m! W) g
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* Y- C( Z& }/ j晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。2 B1 `5 Q% X6 a8 |4 L- Y( E
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)- c# E* o9 A8 p4 V
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3 k' A: ^' s+ h7 s拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。5 S1 x0 C% D, F* c% @
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% v) ]0 H% s( ^8 x9 |* @WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。6 ~; L, X1 I) l$ s5 `  F" l# l
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)+ X1 M$ J% |2 l
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Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes# l8 h2 Y$ ]1 M0 `
Irene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)2 @: {- Z. X% S- H$ D
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?+ m9 b( m2 M  X
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)" o) j" q( [3 E! l
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。( S  m8 T& _0 `" J4 I! [0 }& [. g
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。): d4 Z* V- v8 {- z
Watson: Get that out of my face.. D  p. x0 t9 A' t. _- E
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
* i2 E- v2 V* c( W4 _) nWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.$ e9 ~$ H8 S) c# B7 i- m/ b/ O' X( K
路人警官Clarky上场。
1 s, X5 k3 v) n" X$ P; v: UClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
. h  F4 z+ k$ h. H! EHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)" \: j( i4 I0 o
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
* F4 G) e5 }% C; c' o- `- Y* yWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
9 R* E9 \$ G# S7 u) Z6 JHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.7 A% A% l- [; z7 Q. Q
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9 y! `0 V- A1 P墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
( k0 _+ F8 b  t, q3 f% l; rWatson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)$ v& ?  C+ {- i/ W( ~
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
( c& c4 z+ L) [! `# p9 b* EWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。): ~( t6 j& I! d1 [
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。" k9 B; q  N& P1 B; Z) q  ?
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)8 q( }/ F8 w2 N  Y
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…/ K8 O& t( ?, A; M% f# M
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
: t# D$ F% }+ D/ W$ L* @% Y+ G3 J- w死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene4 y* ]% b" G( L6 c" D; w0 l  ~. t% C
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
4 h: X) \( \( Z后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
! E( V  t7 e: oHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。- W, I( n$ v' \  I7 x/ I
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。" x4 O; z5 y/ L& s  K
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
$ A# X  O4 }% T, O: {Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
! ]5 [( n" v, FWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)0 M4 r0 q& I' |3 {- a
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)
+ r. W9 W* B+ ^1 }/ mMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?6 o. B3 J" _( \6 N% X% f" y5 B
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)0 |% U- p3 s* N( W0 ?3 n/ ^
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)5 ~! N6 g: ], v- L! ?
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
" m, `8 R, b' xHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)* l0 c% u8 b$ C3 ?% r# m
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。); g( v8 R* P* _3 E
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
8 L- ?# T$ D1 eWatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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2 Z7 v( }( L& U* [7 B, @, q总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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