 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
$ r' g6 \: l4 m F6 W |2 t. kWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
7 E4 W; |) i1 |. xHolmes: I just picked it up.
; z3 q' w I% t) z. }8 q, @( CWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) % z" R7 b1 h' t; B
Holmes: Knew I forgot something./ x/ ?6 v5 m1 G5 ?1 \
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
1 \+ [- X9 `$ C# nHolmes: You did.3 Y# @; {) @+ h; \8 x
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) * H3 L# [* k( e
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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6 y( ^, {- G3 M) {1 Q宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 - u/ x: {; } I/ v1 C9 w
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.7 k' q% Y& l X4 V- u; u1 V i; q
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ' ?, W0 t) }1 z( ?; G5 g, z( s! b. C
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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( M5 U3 E* Y5 e" x4 ^拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
: l' h# j$ W1 T" o# WWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) + v O% |/ F6 N3 @
6.
9 l' Z' J P! K! a* ?' BHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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# e J. E# N1 \4 e& x& Q5 A6 r3 GBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 8 ~" Y( T9 s g! S# T
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 5 d9 ]' F7 G, x7 h: @' J
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
! V( Y, r: J& N; BIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?7 U Z3 ]4 r3 [# S* @/ g
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
8 e5 T7 y# X3 T; {8 I/ V7 B/ _Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
( ~& {, ~6 |- ?Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ; {- L1 {* ]8 a0 z- [
Watson: Get that out of my face.5 O. u u' ^) j z2 M
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.; b2 z4 [: q7 T! a/ g6 y8 g
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
; g ^/ T( r5 t" ^+ e; @) o: }路人警官 Clarky上场。
0 B5 Q; O* `( @2 I' _0 ~Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.3 c& z& X* r( \% N9 }
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 4 h6 }; e; k* V& @8 [, j
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
% v+ p ?1 x- u0 u i4 mWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?) \" p' _: n- ~( P
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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0 e+ k0 T1 d2 p. q0 W墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 - n+ b+ G( E( D0 V e' B& K
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 4 r0 Y9 X' ^2 q7 W
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
7 x: z3 X( n8 q# H7 J c$ gWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 8 H! F( b8 @5 m& |! c0 V
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
* o9 B- l; K1 i# X; G: B# x( K. IHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) # L. [7 @0 [# U: D9 b7 [! {
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…$ O! t% W9 a& G) E' e5 L5 {
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) # s/ G" l) ]) ]- C) l% {
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
) i4 l! |7 \3 e( f# WHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) . {7 U8 ]) R" m, {
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
8 G" ]- v# T- [6 ~8 CHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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! w5 O# a2 J( m( L' K6 z警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 & j! m2 D8 Y2 o9 S0 T
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
# |& N% O! S! b+ N话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
2 e4 z2 N: W" _8 V8 iHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) + r+ V+ o: V# O1 R- |4 l& @$ r
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
( i. L, |1 p7 J. ]Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
" d% ~! m. W! U! LMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?/ C9 l* t1 ]. H% V! S1 c3 e2 s# g
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) $ W: A2 F6 I, N( ] r
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
2 l1 a! T# N1 Y4 ~: UWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
7 d8 x9 e; O1 O7 B5 K- h8 PHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 5 i1 ^% {1 R$ M6 `0 e* M) ]; z# `
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
- S2 O: |' \; S% u1 P9 r tMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
' p* J4 o* d7 w3 H7 ^( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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9 n p" Y! i" |- U& Y/ ]4 S总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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