 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 . W' ~* p5 S; E r
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
; @" o* t) @; j5 I @" u" _Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
" N0 d8 K1 k" K& tHolmes: I just picked it up.1 k" I4 f) R1 C6 L2 J
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
' |/ \0 T+ a2 X$ tHolmes: Knew I forgot something./ R* m* ~1 O. |# |5 ^6 u/ l3 U
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 7 x) N# Y o( p3 }) g, G2 S$ }5 A
Holmes: You did.
3 x& w! Y1 F" P4 w$ Q(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
* m9 l% [/ A; d gHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.' _8 i9 D% y0 z/ i9 n
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0 l# }/ `5 k$ B' [- w5 p宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
& F( @/ F5 ?% Y- f) u8 SWatson: Permission to enter the armory.. f. q0 \# V. C: Z; z. C
Holmes: Granted.7 M& z* u* C3 [; f) Z- t
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 v# ~9 N/ \, q) p/ j; J+ b
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) , n& ^% {( u" b7 d) d9 C8 s
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8 X; u3 n7 `: a3 C2 Y V拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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* f3 k2 u4 Z3 |4 J& n# s5 EWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 7 t! P; s V5 @! w- h& J( {8 @1 o
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 8 M" v0 ?9 C* i9 Q* s! v5 S
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 ' @* r( ?! `* z- Q, H
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# }! Q6 P, U' c( R: N' R: ?Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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4 N6 k3 r$ i2 o( ?Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 ! Z8 E9 c& X7 c3 P; f2 l1 w- A
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 8 y4 r1 q8 D0 S4 X
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?1 l# W5 O4 P! ?( t+ q B
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
3 z2 A3 O- U- g% K8 oIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
, x; w( D- d1 \1 p+ L# iHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
/ g6 l" V! ]" F* g# l- A7 B0 v4 EWatson: Get that out of my face.
* N: G D5 T8 B/ e gHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
7 Z& a; C/ E1 e& r: j0 y ]' wWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
1 T" M) |; A/ F1 x2 H' U8 P路人警官 Clarky上场。 n# A1 q2 q" L; g2 ]5 n
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
8 L+ Z6 d! M3 i" SHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) + _4 I0 y. S9 o5 u, \7 Q' X" H
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
! S; Y4 @/ \6 U0 J# O( w5 YWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
8 ^0 W6 d+ ]9 B& kHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.% D9 Y6 _/ J& z) J# |1 y5 u
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$ }8 }* f2 p6 m, N: m- @* [+ g墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 ; @$ k# [- W/ c, h+ s0 ]( m/ s. x' z8 i
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
+ X8 H1 v7 A, }8 F/ K% dHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
* t2 H( C) ~% ~ K- sWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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+ _8 B X2 ?1 \/ C+ O河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
( d8 `' R" k6 U/ rHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
' z( h; d- Y/ Z- NBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…; Y# l7 i3 h, j, D0 N6 K
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 0 H! r. V( b( Q D6 d8 j" U
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 0 O/ H$ [3 h8 y
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
! }, _. C/ a. r% V! F后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 V* u% c5 W) p2 ?1 d- |
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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Y0 O, x( N, r& T- [警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 ) C3 x1 E* v8 C) E0 ?
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.' C* t& K& b* p
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
' m% I4 |3 f* ~* e/ Z: L话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 & T+ |4 A2 t1 @8 q; K
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) . d1 k" K ^" |7 A/ G' W9 y% y
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
3 Y0 Q( c! T" [8 G! _) g3 Q) C0 p: {3 o) tHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) : {: v7 S! v/ a* U* [
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
: r( L5 o$ k- Y( A& c: oWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) % a1 s7 z Y8 a9 I3 B
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
4 a9 ~6 a& K! m: p! I+ g2 C6 fWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) ' p* R* d5 Z' Q5 g. y
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
" X% d" {' c" ^: ?( VWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
& l3 A2 k% B8 RMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
& _3 G8 E6 ?/ }$ B& [0 H( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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* ^- L8 w- I) k& A, K0 h* X总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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