 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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" `% @9 e8 w6 a6 H: }( J0 ~/ G影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 - d% a3 ]3 G9 |' f. X
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
: V% K' O" a0 {. n. ?) J; ]Holmes: I just picked it up." F* i$ }% o/ X, Q6 x6 l
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) ^2 e4 C8 Y8 G8 B3 B/ G0 s. Y& I7 R2 W
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.% v' Z% Q) s1 I9 @) A( F" n/ a# ^6 ^
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 9 m: k' _5 c( P% _9 q8 v5 z2 K
Holmes: You did.0 d( k: Y: X* s3 v; D* Z( q; s
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
# c" a& [6 T7 w8 t0 UHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.: P+ S( }, O- b
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 + G% i3 P$ K) Z5 A
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
: ?( s0 R0 d0 i7 e! iHolmes: Granted.
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" s6 a, X1 j$ S2 ]/ c2 }7 Q晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 5 d0 {( ?- `5 @+ H6 |6 B& u
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ' D% ]- e/ t# Q( [
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$ c+ ^: k2 P; @# o0 AWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 / T6 e2 N6 }5 `, H2 ~/ ?! [
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 - [% B: i W# f p5 N: h' \, ?
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
0 f6 `" o: C& Z J0 v! d( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 7 @7 W+ H- k9 ]0 o/ }0 D/ [
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
' R6 A: ?- a) [/ aHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ' ~# T: h5 o1 q) x7 m* r+ I+ Y6 B
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope./ \( S$ a$ c; O, m
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ; _/ F, }# n& _ x- k
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) . A* }, z. o1 k4 u! ^' a: V
Watson: Get that out of my face.
' I: N' T% S# s) \( s" M j0 @Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
, B0 [; X- s" xWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.: n7 P) m" Y: n' l. U
路人警官 Clarky上场。
$ P3 t6 d/ H) \7 X3 c6 OClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
- S% }0 C: Q% q( Z/ P, zHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
: G+ D& F! W$ W: E% p) U得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 _4 V- _: i( [' P' n
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
4 [+ @$ c( l, Z; v) N; A. S. VHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.% Y/ r" @: I5 \8 `
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9 E4 n' R3 I7 T8 }) V墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 ( _& I" {- U1 W! D, F! W
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) # N* O8 H3 A! _' V
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely., u! W9 ^+ f9 i& A* V; Q8 P! A; s
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 9 U& R) i4 x h! x# Q2 W. J1 C
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 & G Y- l2 t( t
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
" `5 i3 J* A/ MBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…! Y: B' P( ?7 i) E
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) ! s) M: L+ v: c+ _" m; d
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 ' _4 d+ ^$ r; {+ N V7 ]. f
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) ; C: I/ |, M' T1 w
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
$ z0 H1 Z% _8 p* n3 Z$ \$ v% THolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) : `8 n: [; M/ C; E- _9 t2 L5 ~/ j: q
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
1 R6 q4 z7 m& ^( k2 ~3 P4 E+ b% KLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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: B# q/ n1 _9 Q9 q K" d接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
; U7 o3 @0 q7 j3 x: N9 f话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 5 W [, N k% F8 @$ { w1 h
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) , `9 b" U, q: P8 ]6 b
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
# v) Y& q( c% h3 jHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
0 J) M, d6 M' ?5 wMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
- L5 ]- z3 w9 cWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 4 _9 j0 z) ~! K: X' ?0 h' m7 ]8 L
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 0 ?; z; e, \; O" R: v
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 7 S7 t: y9 Z; g: a2 M u3 P8 f
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) # b9 l4 ^; A6 m- M9 l0 P
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
8 o/ e! A' d& w4 XMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 0 g) r, A) S% k, N2 t# @
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) $ J) g; q' ~3 _" D$ q
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8 A& @8 x+ v' V F$ T3 |总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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