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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。5 z  t$ T: x7 V! f
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
7 R% o! X% y, K% j3 MHolmes: I just picked it up.
7 m" o: G6 a6 B' ~) o- gWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
5 n( t2 q9 _9 o" l" R4 rHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
) o3 n- w3 F6 E2 WWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
* [3 f! |# O) R9 `" [  Y/ dHolmes: You did.3 A4 u5 D9 z7 g( w4 N& ~9 U# p# |
(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
, n$ }' P/ |1 L( ^' W$ DHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。
; X$ ?0 _( R  z" ?Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
! o* p( J- `. t; M4 L! XHolmes: Granted.
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; i3 J- M+ \4 `6 a* I' _晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。! C" o, P% Q+ u5 C2 e1 p. Y* |4 w2 N
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。5 z* R* W9 @0 S0 d$ Y: }
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+ k1 c7 g. q* r6 C+ h, H# e1 S2 AWatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
  O1 V$ u0 I7 F( IWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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, @) w3 ^0 _9 T" Y  m% ]Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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* E0 u- g  `$ A; R) Y5 i, gBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
- J$ \8 ~8 q4 I2 l# @) d( g' LIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)
3 w3 d" w5 w( f( C8 Q8 r2 wIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
6 z  y6 m5 i) GHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)
9 j. n1 `6 q, N# p$ H& MIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.' [9 _+ T2 _+ X3 a: `5 U- o
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。. i  ?2 ?' _+ {0 n5 m. R9 _/ @
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
( O/ `1 {, L! qWatson: Get that out of my face.
2 `6 `+ G' T& }" }( R2 r# W! kHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
7 p" G3 p+ C6 b+ q& |4 wWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.* h6 g0 c. x0 z$ b
路人警官Clarky上场。
8 v% Q& M! J4 E" oClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
5 s: U2 J7 t* M+ ?) H- f9 h. y5 `Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)% M1 @9 I- Q2 }9 N2 o
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
$ o/ [* T/ b) I. z. U: MWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?5 k# \( t( B+ ^9 |, [9 c8 s
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。  W' R4 b! g  K6 w$ ^
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)% @" l. D. X8 v$ q8 J
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.; d' x% f& S& X
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。5 @& K5 b- p' ]* [
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
; T1 D& N; P( b3 j6 K4 SBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…: p6 q0 @/ c, {( O
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
2 {' v- x% M/ m7 s, Q- ]  V死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
0 f% b9 b- X: Y1 l) G0 ]- `Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)( j$ h- a! ]9 v
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
( X- `2 T  T: K+ y& k! w2 o8 ?Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。); @& U! U& g6 m/ a8 R
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7 ]+ x4 O" `& H- U0 y" l警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
( d( s7 @, B/ ILestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.- C( [& I. u0 o4 Z5 w6 p  p
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。3 W5 x5 X  Z, p0 m  q/ A3 D* L8 g
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。" B) u2 c9 S3 a1 d* a0 E5 ~( x
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
) ?! }2 ~& U7 }: y. j9 _- `( f) SWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。): W- E+ x' A6 X% y) s
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)
, O2 x4 c! o0 T6 w  l; NMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
4 `9 z. |( Z9 F, QWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)* ?  ?, g$ g  A4 e' P/ z4 E4 W
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。), d% X+ q: r) r) |
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
! t1 a5 ~( p8 r6 h( m/ yHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)8 V7 ~- l0 `) q% f; U( f) V0 C
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
  R; U* ]+ y( }) BMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
9 w  I$ x4 i' c  e# w! ]WatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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8 |& t* E0 T" X! T- T$ b总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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