 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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1.
9 L5 X# h/ j, a5 h影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 5 ]* [2 z8 y1 Q+ l; L; y
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
! K% r4 f: I6 u0 [Holmes: I just picked it up., f' b6 R5 Y2 p& I" a* U1 U6 N
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 3 k a9 \ K9 m. G; q$ ~" Q
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.9 X4 Z' u8 y W2 f8 S5 n' g8 i
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) ( c6 R1 E7 @6 x$ A) Z) M
Holmes: You did.
0 y. J1 l' Q$ n- ^$ C(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
6 i8 N }2 O0 L3 RHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.( ^) W9 E7 N1 T: n! t% [
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
5 |* T- ]1 X; v ?- ]Watson: Permission to enter the armory., c9 ?2 w$ O7 I
Holmes: Granted." {, \, @! y* v5 A: I
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# z2 Z+ q; `! l9 Z; N3 X晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
( g" z, }; H/ U e+ x6 F; d/ |Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) & B* Z0 S& x; S5 D5 S, }5 Z
4.
* W; u4 H0 e1 ]% {: ~: C/ C拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 3 {: m8 B+ H( y( ]8 X8 q
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) * s( u( }0 {7 m& J8 D" U2 X
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 # m7 S" `+ s# A" e
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 7 K$ f) f+ f7 g- Z9 {' f* K0 l
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
2 \9 Z( m- G: K3 n* ]( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
* J" L# w) u7 uIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?* S" a! `7 Y) n0 l9 [( Z. h% b
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
" ^& T9 M4 l( Z& Q4 [8 }Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Y ]: _) P. X5 c) G" VIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 / w# ]. n# S$ s7 ]7 O0 A/ U
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) # w W+ n& b+ p4 d7 `) E
Watson: Get that out of my face.
+ j% P" Y. z$ _& e' T) f5 sHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand., }1 R" d9 E: @& s6 Q
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
9 C' O* u. Z" t7 k路人警官 Clarky上场。
- ~: u9 X9 E" c1 y9 k# r3 t; OClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once." K5 O& _- w- X/ w
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
" x5 V0 Y: c3 S6 @$ J得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
) R& F; o6 z' P5 C9 @/ cWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
7 D" A9 }9 J, ZHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.6 d1 x) `& V. }: U% ~8 t- k9 ^
10.
9 B- T% s: ^5 p; Q: N% F p墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
' v+ [* y z5 ^6 d5 h7 y; N+ O; C( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
6 w; s* H( q3 m8 FHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely., H* K' y! ]3 s$ _
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) ) h0 X/ \9 H4 c' E
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7 Y: ~7 b+ }: [4 Z! A. m, m6 A! h河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 6 u5 x3 r% R3 X4 J/ ^$ O, A
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 7 P( n1 b" s) q: J/ [
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…$ @) v& B) O4 m4 N
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
" { U! s0 |/ K9 o6 X7 O8 j" g死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
9 F" ^- X8 `* p0 f- r" sHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
X) p; P" O$ o( U) V: c% s9 O后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
. U' U0 f8 c" R! C9 NHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 1 P" d7 f7 n2 j: J3 h" b; B
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( c% m: u; _4 o2 W- ?! w. l警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
: O: I8 J* C8 h2 g9 A3 L+ t* \Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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! p9 Y _5 h1 k. f5 H接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
- Z# X8 P: s2 A' M; l( c话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
; i# \8 ?: q) z# VHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
# H: ?- _8 t, w m5 eWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
( M0 d, Q5 M9 \Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
3 Y3 S: K7 v- }8 w2 r/ ?) bMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?+ s! D3 V" t1 d
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) / `9 \ z6 V+ j* y; Y( d
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 0 j f1 p$ a! q4 [" P
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
3 \5 u; A9 z2 {9 ^Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
2 q. d, o) @: JWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
3 L2 B3 _: e, VMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
# V' \3 ~& {5 l ]# {# i q( R( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 2 S( a, x0 y* w
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& w3 L/ E/ g% {; h! H- ^& G6 I1 e, D总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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