 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 * c, }( R( j6 k5 T7 B# A
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
1 ?" D- A2 i# v" {Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
+ G) h* h6 a4 Y% G- V9 `Holmes: I just picked it up.9 W) _, q* v' \: S( X, W
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) ( x2 Y Q @& N, a B# Q2 T. C
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.4 D9 x% ]* t7 F. B( P8 ?( y( X, F( I
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 0 | f& `+ _! y2 x. ]
Holmes: You did.6 Q8 t! H5 K U2 H+ f7 S. ^# T1 z* s
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) / w9 |" k1 P% q" y, t
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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2 Z; S! ?' u# A( [$ S5 a宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ; B Z1 h( B; B0 i. {# T( N- r
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.' v! r% f* u& M
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
/ x! ^" z% @0 t5 }. F. P* R# g/ PWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
- O' O) n( Q1 i4 M+ W' G1 @ rWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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- ], S: a4 ~) B" dHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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% v. s2 S2 r P' B4 P; Y+ o J: pBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
3 X) ], q! s- m0 _( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) . B, W) N8 `) {1 c# M! |
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?$ e! O8 E0 X4 H0 @" }8 v: s: s
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) . w7 R: c6 t2 g1 Y! p' j+ C
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
; s" J: f% J( |Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ?! t( u0 x7 ?9 @; L$ Y' O0 [
Watson: Get that out of my face.
' S4 m8 J9 j- ]Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
2 E$ }& I3 d( }' a6 {& V1 ]Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.! j, Q" u4 x% t# J) }
路人警官 Clarky上场。 ( G% N1 D1 K+ l$ V
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
% q4 a4 a" e8 JHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) f/ g9 O- H# G9 P. `
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 5 W7 a6 W1 y( T3 F; E8 b
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
7 M7 T1 K* e: T$ ^+ AHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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i" W/ _" o; V8 x- `墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 & [3 U+ q& @1 X6 g [% ?5 o% b) p e
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
' l+ t* H z2 \$ v U8 wHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.& M( F) u& Z' t$ Q
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 0 y* S1 j! i5 F( f7 u1 G! S
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
5 t7 [ c) z* T! e6 GBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
3 c9 ]" q$ k# X$ V5 s# c/ R& IWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 9 o6 g9 O5 s" `5 s, W
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 7 x! `2 C5 s' X/ k' u
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
6 H$ ]: o& L" x后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 9 L7 T: U: y. @/ e1 C- X
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 5 e7 s$ o; Y8 m7 q. X0 V
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. o6 {9 G8 s5 q警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
# R0 |6 n% h( u, KLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.9 u9 S7 d% ^+ ^; u/ K
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7 K! i7 ?3 X" |6 ]) p H接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 0 b" @/ d! _: L$ |. i
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
( c9 `+ B/ Z2 d, F @Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) , W& U x! q) q3 ^
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) " v+ E# S9 p) A9 M- r( K
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
8 `6 ~$ p' Y1 s# j& ?. NMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
2 M4 t! \+ w! g1 aWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
+ ^ d$ |. z( y T6 v! N4 kHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
& ]& y; B; Y- H+ UWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
! y% Y/ b! }0 d- m$ J3 HHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) b) }" D! R3 C4 `" j3 D# l
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
! X H3 q. E% [' GMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 5 f7 ]7 U. k- ] p( D$ ~3 C6 v
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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