 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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, T+ g% j E" M, \5 [" y影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 5 H. K) _1 d6 p A. O; m5 C
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) + ^2 g9 y! Q$ C6 ^
Holmes: I just picked it up.- o0 v( p& G# H
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
, J# {& P/ w& ^* k5 CHolmes: Knew I forgot something.5 G( O# l! R& {5 s+ F4 z! y5 y+ Z' M
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
- c" o: f1 D( b( a4 yHolmes: You did.
8 d( Z' P% F4 @6 F(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
" f) C/ H; b9 H& T# a6 oHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.* B5 B! `) j0 a
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( j* j, S) n* M, } v宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 4 v t& s- x- n+ C/ n
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
9 y4 K2 h( H' W) P2 DHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 + Y3 ?+ F8 ?$ U
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) % n% b B9 T9 y! O/ [
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 9 h8 x' O' Q; m. m1 c5 c
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4 A* t7 ]- \* E! K3 d3 WWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
4 b/ k! W( i. _8 K( M2 l8 { v; ]4 FWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) % x: k: g; q) r C) ]
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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, f3 o4 |1 s8 i6 w$ Q" j) D% p, uBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
8 P Z: s5 v- [ s( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
; N) R. e: u6 y; }. w# h# iIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?5 U W# D# P8 H& i4 L4 f8 [- A
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
/ C1 d, M* z! P6 k& g! ?' wIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.; R2 I6 A9 \' v( i
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/ J$ U5 O7 N. |" H- q0 fIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 , n2 A& C6 p, f# l$ J L
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ; P# P P; P* p" P3 F# ^ ~. S
Watson: Get that out of my face.
7 {- T% G$ b5 k6 b/ e& B* [8 uHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.8 b3 d8 |4 E3 H3 K
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
6 U' p& f8 H& ?6 s0 T3 Z; p m4 {, `路人警官 Clarky上场。
- x, ?: ~. W/ UClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
5 k' c2 p+ `7 `4 O) FHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) # V' ?" G& L% F( @& ]% L
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 0 v& K& P$ m0 f$ l0 @) d
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
0 ]& b8 n2 h- X& z+ S) k5 tHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
; `$ @7 b% S( L9 M1 U( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) ( N2 a2 t1 \6 U0 x3 a/ }
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.( S7 o+ |1 L+ d) ?& X+ u
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 8 c. h5 o6 o& w& B4 ]% p
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
" O, d$ K' B! @6 z# KHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) S+ @2 t; j2 Q6 ]
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…6 u, H+ ?0 D. f e& x0 z* P0 _
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) : l) {. Q1 }$ ?2 e* F5 g3 ?
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 5 i* K, h2 a4 N( W6 J
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) : _/ V& n7 C3 z; d, ?
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
% c$ {8 v% J8 e; N7 BHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) P+ G) \8 h- D d* f; l0 Y( Q
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 & j- f, `# c! d3 q, S0 y
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.5 c9 P/ U, B% Q
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1 {9 k- i& y8 {; `" H接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
8 E ^3 V1 r. A( P0 c话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
% h3 E3 y3 N, }0 @Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
& L( P$ F4 q3 `3 f) cWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
' b+ y/ }5 E* pHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
0 _2 U3 [% a: e( cMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
6 d' @! C& l! a1 q, ?: ?$ AWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) / m* C, D/ P* l
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 6 K0 w/ c v. V e u9 U) S
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
1 h8 P2 X- s6 ?9 o4 k( QHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) - t$ `( y' E& ]; B. p6 i7 M% u: Q
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) ^; B8 w- K2 H1 ]
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
& H$ T1 N. c6 Q7 h9 [5 }( h( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 2 c) y4 A: z4 w$ Z0 d2 [
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( l& y# R! @: p( K" Y总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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