 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ! f5 Y" Y1 J3 a5 |
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
( B; ~# g) |7 [9 D/ R3 w( X2 pWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
z" U6 ^% j5 ~- }% e4 \) BHolmes: I just picked it up.
+ L; v( I+ R! _$ H d& BWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
i9 @/ d: {1 s4 l& b( z+ jHolmes: Knew I forgot something.: D! i4 Q* y7 S, x: g' E
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) ( [& y. w5 P( |1 e* @
Holmes: You did.4 X8 o8 b2 Y; @' D
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 6 `2 y# {+ L( a; d7 j+ [
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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: t) z" d; V5 G/ z4 }宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 + s3 y, M* M f- {2 C! ~
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.6 U/ g5 y% q/ J! E4 L E
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ' `" S4 C. e" X3 e( B5 @
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ' n$ g! u$ F# \
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7 t3 `9 q0 b+ O) k; k% x8 UWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
1 K' m" Y: G1 n# _& d5 @% [& z$ qWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) & w. A9 ^, m8 ^+ C9 b1 T! b
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 5 F6 b. T4 F7 V; Z- _/ C; Z
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 ! i7 v/ k3 D2 W0 U0 n* [
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. M6 _* o; K6 `3 NIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 ' G8 B8 \6 }2 u
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) - g9 L/ Q0 k5 \$ c
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?+ t; |! W3 G, B4 X) ?
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) # L5 e6 ] n) h
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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( Q% F8 L$ d5 H% ?' }# C- oIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
& y7 ^; \; _/ _* Q- JHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
# R4 N3 ]- [4 d: MWatson: Get that out of my face.
" n; q9 n1 @) d$ M& H- NHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
3 \9 J$ D/ l9 S+ F7 r0 [: IWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
) s! J# s1 P! E) o8 f路人警官 Clarky上场。 3 B9 h. r4 [$ O$ X8 s1 G# S
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.$ c1 g( T( O! \0 G/ t3 I
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
6 }0 b* N6 B! ~6 K/ _得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
* X. V0 w0 L. }( oWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?* {) |( b: |: L, U' U
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.0 d3 }5 ]8 ]/ v# `' ^
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 4 ^6 k: K- v( {; e
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 2 X0 n4 G0 Q" B- p% y' e% N, Z
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.5 `# D, }. x) P+ g
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 7 e0 r, E& s! V0 m9 \
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
6 \" y+ x+ s7 T {* F' u; ~Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…6 D0 H- o" J1 `. g$ n8 O" N5 A n
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) * m) k# P9 z! B1 c4 U! O$ R5 l. H
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 7 W& ^+ ]4 w; |6 O5 [8 h; g3 ?
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
, _1 g* H' h. e/ l* P3 y. d后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 " `' U0 T% j% W' Y0 r8 B* q1 ^
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) ' z6 ?% D8 F: ^) f' P
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 ' S D6 \+ S9 @* K+ O6 [
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.* x, W D" t; |) [/ I7 G6 j! T
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 # E( ~; s. E' i4 s
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 % W& a; c/ R7 ?, Z1 m: b4 D
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
5 o7 ^8 c0 p% N1 p! kWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) - l0 b4 S1 T5 ~8 y3 P- T
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) / d p) V( G. u) o7 L) Y- T$ U: F
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?1 l8 b! ^+ l( N' _) A3 j& a$ W
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 1 }& Q# R+ L7 d: X
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
. P8 c( E+ T @. g) H0 pWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
' t" d+ ?, q. m' J$ P& f7 JHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
1 \5 [( g/ d4 V( n; [9 C! WWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
- z, U. w0 C! S( E8 [2 U0 uMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
3 t) `- D8 z7 N q% [6 q8 F( e( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 2 I# f7 B5 T) P, x/ \, W
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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