 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
1 i/ S! ^. C0 M8 E+ _Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
) |2 X, y+ h0 G3 QHolmes: I just picked it up.
# Z# \6 R b+ x8 J; C0 s" V+ I3 O* lWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) ! d! b3 }9 Y6 ^/ z* m) f
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.: q2 V2 k' E4 L6 m7 c* L3 Y" P
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
3 x, m" n9 X" z7 G, wHolmes: You did., ^+ G _: m/ t! I3 A8 T
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
) e% @2 T. y% J# k- kHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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' I+ F' y9 b7 X( V- ^2 |0 e0 `. Q宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
4 `( Q5 d: S; p# H9 R6 BWatson: Permission to enter the armory.2 P/ U" X$ t, R' s) b7 r$ a9 W, {
Holmes: Granted.) E+ i2 k! _; G' M1 z7 n Y. I
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
3 a( H# p0 j: f4 _Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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4 b) h7 u9 s6 w2 B6 W1 Z0 p拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 : T) E {6 u+ T+ A
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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5 d: n W% ]7 E( Z ?" HHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 " t* N& b4 O4 z3 r3 Q
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 0 B% c& i, _! G; P) R% Z
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 & u* {# J4 X- H7 j& S* d; s. U
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 2 V, k% C1 h' }+ x3 z
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?0 Z; }4 m! g# ?: M6 q" c1 y
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) , Z- x' k4 u' P/ y
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.% _, i e5 Q# ^% m! V0 X/ B
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# `# k' ~+ b; x+ Z% Q6 m- N# \Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 * d3 f* f2 V, E2 O. B/ k; b: l/ x* z
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ( p/ \3 I! `3 e
Watson: Get that out of my face.
$ p- @0 r3 V0 S2 `) ]( y; C' L4 xHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
j B: D1 z; b; ^9 Z) zWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
( r, l- u3 l2 ~) K- x# c: {: y路人警官 Clarky上场。
/ ?2 P/ z2 k! _3 CClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.; t3 Z, G1 b0 q2 m! D8 ]
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
! J! H+ v/ B2 `得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
9 C1 w" U/ g, L+ e" H4 v- f4 [Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?3 {( a0 c0 l+ i X7 R6 G- h
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.7 o7 _: E$ m. u* \; p6 e* P/ M/ q3 h' j
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- H; \* u3 o$ {# W" T4 l/ H$ _墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
6 [0 A3 X" S; ~1 p; r! Z/ {( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 9 `, P7 ?" ?0 u" O* O
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
7 u: R8 S9 h9 ]% H: JWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) " t( M7 Z8 Y! b: K# U; m
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 ' f' N& o& F% A% X: Y
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 8 m: R. {& C& l8 s8 a
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
+ @: N* [# L# @2 D$ WWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 3 F7 |% i; ~6 @& @
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
+ K; I3 }- \$ E5 _Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
1 q0 W# ?% l5 a; D- a6 U! R后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 # y4 G+ Z) X: Y7 ~6 g' j% H- _
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 0 \5 O" V4 N. @! q" ]& N+ ~
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P# f; A( Z6 I6 b警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
+ D: i1 E0 c$ f) t7 m0 n+ ELestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing., X5 H3 q5 ^/ m7 E
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 . A0 S0 ~. [, M: ^7 E
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 4 ] ?9 r- I0 ^
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
" g. ?4 F- c; R7 N7 IWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 8 }" x p* X: p; [
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
6 ?" r' N* O. h$ b' {. e" CMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?2 I2 \$ U7 H5 ^6 p1 w6 |0 p' \
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 1 v& Y2 T, c( [' w" ~
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) . @/ Y4 o# Q. }+ I
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 9 g, f( U s$ N8 c
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) ) Y$ `! [$ }8 p+ L" t+ F& d
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
, d/ [1 |, L4 n% Q# TMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
9 H% U+ U( L a3 k) A( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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3 E% D% M1 B3 K! B8 c7 N$ s [* l总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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