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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay9 x" o3 f: T7 h- j) y; Z1 r* |; o
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4 k1 g; L* v, E- c* e' c( v影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。- y1 Q+ e: }/ z
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
- {7 B; ]+ W9 I5 T8 ^, E/ y8 THolmes: I just picked it up.# I/ [% U0 d2 K# M# m
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)# u) U; C0 G( e5 X3 Y# Y
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.$ M8 O% p$ J; t( ~5 w; u
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)! ?6 @; b6 ?$ g5 M1 y; H
Holmes: You did.( `4 M0 h. m! T+ ~. a2 L
(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)* D1 l) v4 O8 \) h# |& R" F! v
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.9 c* c  f5 O. i* L6 I- ]
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。, m! A0 Q1 T! A$ j, Q/ {
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
1 ]) N8 M, R! J8 I/ a# pHolmes: Granted.
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6 f! k+ H$ W8 M4 W  j) n% Z晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。5 b, w8 P5 n# q  u! s
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)4 C( H7 R  x$ W
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0 p  Q$ T7 d, ]& R; r拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。- x; O' |9 \& G3 p2 v  L
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。); n1 W3 v/ v3 U
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3 R( E+ C4 i6 kHolmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。7 K1 ?" y$ |( i. _$ A
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" K  N4 O1 _; V. t8 h0 `" wBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
- t: E5 G: E( [Irene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)# n$ R8 K1 O/ x
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
0 Q0 {, w$ D( K( GHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)
1 v( L! v- h. VIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.' I3 C! _3 E, ~7 O
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。
- X: }! A, l9 C% sHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。), S% z" m, X: ]( w  L! h3 B/ z: ?
Watson: Get that out of my face." `' Q4 k& v# n; v
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
8 g8 I0 L$ K8 U% PWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
6 o, V! D4 I9 I2 B, U8 z! q) U7 |路人警官Clarky上场。2 y; M* u6 `$ @" Z- d$ K
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
) N) c9 I4 ?6 xHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)) a9 `$ O  w5 H
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
: |8 S" I; G( D7 eWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?5 r( D  t0 |8 X4 `1 D% E1 R
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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* h. T* ]) e, J- d墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
% D! h) y! B8 V+ iWatson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)) m! l6 `0 }2 @: |# A1 b2 c
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
& U1 x' r! n& PWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)0 V) j3 U' {3 r9 l5 n
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, G2 W9 H  L$ F5 A9 N) J/ |8 A河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。
2 X; \( H4 N2 h! ZHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)) }6 A, b1 l; h$ E% K  p
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
$ m0 @7 t! G- j5 ]6 E5 lWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
- g3 ?) `! P4 q- V3 B死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
# K0 B2 a1 }; p5 @$ G% lHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
3 b# q' [4 H( k: D; \后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
/ \, D( S: G0 XHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)  n4 |+ B) H0 v9 q  f/ \& U
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% s; R7 k0 d+ T$ `. d  \警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
9 i5 C9 _& H4 b. u1 {  QLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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: }4 J: I3 x$ e接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。5 ?7 s1 Y; n1 {+ t
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。7 j6 w9 Q. y5 ^+ H
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
- p: n" L2 R9 K. D7 ^) ^Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)2 @! u) ]: w2 _  u) M; F# S- v
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。); E7 ]9 e- R* ?+ m5 W( B2 X# s
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?, r# n5 K+ r* e- ]: B( @% @3 N7 `' E6 Q
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
: |5 s9 ^: C6 ?/ q2 y, z  w7 z3 iHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)# l1 f4 y: g; }8 m. c/ b. V
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)0 J/ o" l% ~' q! |8 ^/ h3 p( _
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)) F9 o2 a& Q0 t2 z8 ~% U# y9 E
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)8 ^& L& {  q/ s+ r: H8 `
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
: ~' z# ~! j  s6 I( ]WatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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" j9 K$ t$ J! n; L. h" ]总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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