 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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1.
' {1 u$ P! ^" e3 f' y9 z/ O影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 - _1 `6 \! s/ w" [, I( E% [
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) ) ^5 E7 Q' h) e% ~/ [
Holmes: I just picked it up.
& M( \1 a3 G& Q7 |Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
# s: W/ W' b$ P z8 g) e6 y, ?6 u" ZHolmes: Knew I forgot something.9 |: S/ Y% v! K: f0 H9 a" K
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
. j. p: o q2 S* h# ]! qHolmes: You did.
# c4 A6 r' Z# g4 [(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 4 Z v4 S$ C- A2 p7 K
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 / W L- [7 V/ H) i T% _1 g4 p4 w
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
2 j6 z8 M3 ?' O! \Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
; `; [0 a5 {4 qWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) ( M3 O- o4 `! ~4 F7 f( t/ w
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ! K7 s3 o2 Z; ?2 V/ Z+ b6 ^
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 9 }6 [) p+ M4 l9 T5 U2 I, g) ^
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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8 @ P) h, b h' y* U2 c% CBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 3 O5 `. |# |1 U: r. g
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
5 v/ s& @3 b8 ^5 \9 SIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?9 n5 W6 f3 x$ H: Z
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
8 u* V. J4 C9 b% vIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ) O+ a* r, v& y2 w) e
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) " e, O! W; n! ~# ?9 S( J
Watson: Get that out of my face.: w; |0 a$ `& Y! {: ~ u5 f
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.- ]$ N9 C. [5 W# A: O5 P
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.- @9 K+ a6 n+ X+ @0 v ]' U
路人警官 Clarky上场。
& g6 u2 Q' H- OClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
& ^" ^7 U) @. c2 }0 VHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) + b7 s! I$ u- v5 Q! ~0 Y2 y' R
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
) H2 G$ {4 b2 IWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
/ Z1 w. x8 j, V) m* V/ m# XHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 ) k: e: e' b* A7 v
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 3 {) u4 T; u9 W, m( T2 f# z6 d% g
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.3 s, K, s* Q. Z9 U1 @; \
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 2 e! I8 c4 o$ g& z
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) * q$ e- l( Z9 B
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…; l) \) q- R- q5 p4 z3 ], k2 s
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) , M* U, l! ? N+ Q- S' i
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 , F! J+ Q. x! C( h, r# T
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
. A3 L2 K: @6 K+ M0 v8 t后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 ) v' ?# o5 i+ A8 J! E& @7 L% Z
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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7 |1 L# S1 h% O- K9 Q/ v警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
$ ^/ a& O9 u1 C' i; ~Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.0 s: R3 z6 J' h- I! K a
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/ q* P' m+ F l+ R& Q( o接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 9 _* d, o- E$ n5 i( m) G
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
2 @8 ^- d5 L7 w0 Y) M. D& GHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 9 q3 l9 z6 d" s- `8 [
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
$ d% x) [, b" UHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
- G9 X1 ~3 T0 E+ MMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
3 P X: B% o' yWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) + I m+ I4 s# K. ?, F8 D! o' i
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 1 N3 Q+ X9 k. @) y( ^
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) ; D9 P9 ?1 K! r! d
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
* S) Y2 \. o( ?8 fWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) ; ?/ g! M! ]& [2 P* @* v8 o
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 8 a2 W9 F% ]$ P: ?- o% L6 I
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 9 r/ f& W( [4 [# Q. ^0 Z
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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