 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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( L$ V4 b& `! F7 l7 x影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 , P5 f; }+ r2 Z2 N
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) . h4 X) A6 _- H6 F
Holmes: I just picked it up.
6 t8 e2 |3 I/ z. mWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) + r4 a' } y- l- K3 ]! d
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.! R) M, p0 P y* {, \
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
- a$ \7 U1 c! i, |Holmes: You did.6 W( R+ _" J" K j7 q
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
( ^$ u$ N- ^( {: I0 G! hHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
1 x- ^2 I& N- Q& ]. Q3 A) M, T4 f) VWatson: Permission to enter the armory.8 C7 c3 S' k' d9 D" M- R
Holmes: Granted.$ c6 w9 n9 |; y0 I K
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 5 Z0 h% R* ]4 D. [
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 / Z, ]6 g5 K7 F; D P& e, I) n) {# O
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 7 ?- [" ]- A* [, j$ j( P+ [
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) ' ~9 u7 k5 Z0 ]/ o) w" ?
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9 Q. f& l3 U' A8 kHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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. z$ ^$ A4 c, f! U" ZBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
+ v$ i/ W V. f6 |: B C; _6 r, z( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
: A e$ n# T' w1 R2 f1 b9 k0 gIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
# Z+ W" `2 {9 d5 v0 c$ pHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
( r2 ]5 s9 S; c8 `! x( M u! P( YIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope." s2 n1 K B7 j @6 v& N
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) l" m% q. ? T; ~Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
* p% f" _# H5 P0 C$ s' \0 nHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ! \! ~& n' K% x- P) |+ V. A
Watson: Get that out of my face.. A1 @# {2 ^6 [+ c! J6 g" A/ A8 K
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
6 [8 D% i8 {4 T# M& qWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
& G3 \6 }8 b, O路人警官 Clarky上场。
! W/ ^& B. D: f( jClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once., R; l' M1 {% x$ D
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
* k! }' K- d( m0 P得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
[0 m% E/ O9 A# J0 h" PWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?% N$ H+ Z* n, R& [
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
( h. ^* A- ~( b. B# X( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) e T6 F( Y' ?" K
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
- q8 X2 \" M# L) N1 EWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
! b5 s9 {9 w; r% PHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
c8 F) ]: H2 S6 w$ B+ dBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
Z& F( S; h7 D; R/ m3 E# [8 ^; j5 IWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
+ Y7 e" G/ D1 Y J死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 , W5 \4 a' T0 \1 z. _3 @; W
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
4 ~) U2 Z0 Q; V1 g4 ?; Z$ {' d后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
6 k/ t# v# W2 \; Q& t3 Z8 [& B% j: BHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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! p) N5 n, Q& b: l$ z警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
# m; K$ H- s. Y& i8 t2 HLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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# u" p" N A6 I" j接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 : a: g/ Q& E; ]9 M
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 2 I& E2 a1 Z& U) w
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
3 k4 W a' T+ _% w8 p4 V& a+ fWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
% m U/ f# y Z+ OHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
, P* K1 X, x6 }& u4 ] V; J: ]Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
& }* t1 B" `6 n; r3 X2 D% O* _Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 7 @) ?+ V6 Z Q
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
+ J0 ~& g2 _* M8 z. Z# W7 K% KWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) : ^' q/ o; W) m$ X0 n3 _+ L
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 6 B2 c( y! v8 U
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
& I3 X1 Z1 s) f$ XMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
. r0 O' S4 K4 [: E* d/ n% c( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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