 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 5 a, t2 K9 D2 v) L
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
! l" |( T- P3 c9 n+ F$ EHolmes: I just picked it up. o: V, `0 T& {; N) g2 a, `
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 0 d7 x f- t/ R* ?3 S
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.) y. p; T! ]. b$ |; k7 a' F% P
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) : G; Y# _- F. A0 E9 D |& d
Holmes: You did.
5 C$ p3 I& ?5 B5 `(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) * ?' W: b& I" P' a; W* s H
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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6 ?1 \# r; g0 k; O宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 * d7 D0 L1 ~$ T
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
; N# ?2 G+ B8 l% n( AHolmes: Granted.
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& j Y: m+ `" C) i8 C0 m5 k2 h晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 * |- q* {! Y' R# L( a9 G
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) - C- ^0 y+ `' ]# u/ v3 X
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 : C8 D3 j+ A7 ~* l$ a( w0 \$ c
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' [ J9 w' {3 X4 ` T- G* ZWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 + d4 P$ ~- b3 _! J, e/ z
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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- Q% |5 ~, p. Q+ c/ c/ }/ \Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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" x, Q, d y4 Z& o: WBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 6 {: m: U% J( T3 z6 n5 W
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
' K$ I, H: n8 G( b. E, a) k( E( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
: T- g# H& \4 e0 b% q1 ^1 lIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?* x& O! @; `+ x
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
; J1 G" B, d! y4 {Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope./ W- x: c: o" s- S* V( A; r* X
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 f+ N* D& l1 T$ h5 V. r
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
) Q" J! `$ ?/ L9 ~( eWatson: Get that out of my face.+ [% E- [3 X5 a; T
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
5 x5 E, f% {* d: E; SWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.6 O, ^! G. H: j5 M
路人警官 Clarky上场。
& [, e* I1 y+ E2 S QClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
& W* p: P, K$ H' ?+ b& B0 u" QHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) * L" n! a- }# a$ N' R; u' R0 |7 \
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
8 D1 X8 L3 L/ Q3 SWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?' w) }; U g/ w# Q: K9 ~3 N/ D, N( W
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
v0 j% U. o: { X& N# T, A1 M/ q( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 2 K9 H% j& m' {1 l% G4 k) F
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
, k" Y' F! T" O8 A% @% jWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 5 p/ j4 w0 P0 V" e! g
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ( {$ }( `5 Q' n$ P
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…' z4 {/ `) M4 \: |9 m* W* p
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
1 m/ J$ d5 B5 N9 z. Z' U' [死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 , A# R9 n2 p2 w% k) F0 s; X
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) " X$ A/ c! k/ a6 J9 S `9 \6 t
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
; w0 A f [( }" XHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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% v5 s$ w4 [; r6 t m# n! B警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
* W. @# ^# E& }9 y& V! vLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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/ ~- \( _* `( C) r, O: [- @2 d接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
6 b& K8 v; b( {, h话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 3 e; G+ d* D# a6 ]# U( j6 {3 m
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
3 |$ m# M6 o& a9 KWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) " p, y% X- F5 y- f+ _8 S
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
7 ^( W. ?2 G/ B- W4 pMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?: x- f2 R. A( Q Q
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) i. o: |' z! {3 H1 H0 G0 V
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
5 K" z% t3 p, @# l+ HWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
+ s9 Z- m- V0 YHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) ; H2 S* U$ T# c g% f
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
$ O* b T' E$ i4 F9 [$ RMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
$ D/ f! G4 Y+ R4 }( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) $ n( o' {' N# W6 h4 ~
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( _7 S) Y) V7 ^6 n4 j9 c/ A! m4 K) P总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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