 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
; _0 F9 X6 C" v( KWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
( H* a' z3 f$ p& `4 Z# GHolmes: I just picked it up., @/ C+ s0 w" d
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 1 S& H* l6 l( Z
Holmes: Knew I forgot something./ t I% F& |# r# J) b/ f" S
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
4 J8 Q1 t6 b. `5 i; S3 NHolmes: You did.: H* B. X4 N4 g! P6 r" i( E
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) ; |* L: ^! J1 Y$ h, [9 e: I' X
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ) x4 m; ?( R6 W
Watson: Permission to enter the armory." \. O* I: v2 i! j
Holmes: Granted.
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" m- a2 [0 ?2 x晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
+ }1 ~3 [6 M1 k( I8 oWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 2 @( O! ~* m5 `3 \, C% F
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ! S* `9 }! w$ _7 K
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
7 p' Z4 N4 f* U( n/ Y0 E1 ]; BWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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0 o( S& s8 a$ MBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 3 R6 N; P. k$ a% N5 |* Y
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4 ^. w& f2 w' [2 Y7 b y$ ^9 k9 ?Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 / E7 K3 B% w) z" S& h
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
# ?3 V. q2 e$ _( a( S9 gIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?3 D! V8 x& P5 |5 t) \# ]8 P- f! s! t
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
7 M) Q0 h; z6 ~1 S/ P- f& Y9 RIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.. x7 E6 z _. k
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 0 S+ b w/ Y) P6 M' o
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
2 j5 a9 P0 e; F2 ]( t& nWatson: Get that out of my face.
6 W9 H1 V( \3 a4 j1 I' QHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.3 g5 X/ R: o- d \1 R
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
- ^" y! M+ Q, U0 } U路人警官 Clarky上场。
2 P! o3 J2 k" HClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.3 |1 O% `3 P5 j4 \& H- M
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) + _1 y8 v+ u3 h# E
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
* j5 N5 x8 P$ I6 ^& \& DWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?) N% [& u5 |1 `$ x
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.7 |- K: c) q8 I: p+ y) R
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& v$ v) u3 V$ m墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 - `( _0 ~" w4 s4 h& `8 u# n: f% Q' L
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) _, U7 ]& T& o: {2 m% a9 a
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.1 e0 q _% O0 S4 `4 G. g0 p Z# Z9 o
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
; ?: ^0 W; f" V, yHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
9 f) h0 A; X% K. w* ZBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…" k# e* z" ]% J# O8 W7 ]
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
) e: y& x! }+ A6 y死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
2 o8 i1 ]+ X- XHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
5 ?( e; l2 }+ E0 ?后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
. w$ {2 B l) [' A2 @ r3 t% |5 EHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 8 J- f" z B: l4 z
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.& N8 |0 {* r9 e% j5 I' O; c' ?, L, ~
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 & ~0 F" M7 G- v' B
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 % J1 g& X1 g, @5 i- g0 Q6 ~; E
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
0 O' U. g4 S# {/ S: RWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
. _6 ?+ k* c$ o9 a5 dHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
2 y. h* o: T; T4 l3 K0 nMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?$ U# d6 F% w4 E$ f. T
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
5 v, J% L' ` ] T! eHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
5 x) x J' O5 `) C: zWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 6 C6 ?; M0 n! p; j$ y* S6 l5 G& m
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
" x4 M" Y9 d) J' wWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
7 {* A/ Q# }! J9 K8 ZMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
4 ^: q2 ^8 D. g# S2 {- o [: q) `( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) $ u% U$ E" ^5 ^1 b9 j9 ?
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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