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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
$ v/ A: d2 j, W: Q***********) Q6 ], V" }9 A4 q3 T0 O/ s$ q. C4 a* m
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7 D. y& `" n3 {- J, N影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。; [. i/ g) Y0 S
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。): H( M8 X' Q! {- w
Holmes: I just picked it up.0 F% b5 o- w- h0 Z4 O" B
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
3 v7 d8 H$ O/ W( bHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
4 N% ~: r7 k* [: Y$ |% AWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)  X' z* K* V2 M: h; }4 W& G
Holmes: You did.5 ~$ j, E0 h* h% Y+ `) ]
(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
: X( s3 Q& K* k$ U# DHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。$ @7 s$ e9 Y& t6 N) k
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.% l9 L- Q. c; M0 v3 P# d0 D
Holmes: Granted.
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: H0 O# |1 j6 t5 I. z1 \' i晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。1 o, n6 }" }5 D" C2 A. S1 T
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)* ^& i. M4 e4 o# d- e  |- N
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拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。$ ?/ f8 T6 G+ I# x2 D1 [5 y
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5 h) @; h! s- IWatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。. `$ |. z7 O! `. B7 H' [
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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" b. S7 }4 i/ }8 w4 _Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。$ E  h1 H+ u- @. ~" j
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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( h: F9 E  I1 V: x5 DIrene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
9 w4 `4 @3 ]8 p/ hIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措): {+ {" O$ X+ t. t# U; Y
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
& \* S2 O2 Z+ x) kHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)
( Y9 j, H0 `, R/ E7 p. FIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.: X9 U6 q0 {, W/ o$ ]
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8 ]5 j, D1 |' l2 dIrene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。
8 _* b" `% O* l0 b1 K8 ?$ Q9 mHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
/ v9 V( T6 i) q& P8 z9 L3 XWatson: Get that out of my face.* h+ \+ f' H' J% T( Z, d# ?9 G
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.$ g2 y9 X6 R5 A3 E; j
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
$ J- h! @+ t; R% R# V6 t& a3 D路人警官Clarky上场。% C. {2 z0 J1 k" G$ d& N
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.: \8 H, X) i# j+ K" B6 V8 u/ A
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
: h8 ?, s0 B( `) o得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
( ~  _9 V( t  y( }& jWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
6 G" p7 E( }, l0 YHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.1 q: C4 d5 g# O( w7 @, K( `
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墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。" S6 c9 n5 ~: V0 |
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)
$ e4 M7 V) i% B- M3 qHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
- s( k) `) p4 Q' R, d! |$ _Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)1 h/ Q' K1 p. c/ ?- I! Y( ~! {5 T
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: j  O' S' X8 ?% E1 R: `2 u- W河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。
( q9 t6 {" G4 |  O; v( f5 EHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
* N/ I9 g6 B! c9 Z' CBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…/ _" {, K/ t0 g
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)5 L6 p% h! M' n: n5 R, P9 h2 g
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
+ [! U" e+ ~2 I$ e- |) t" Q9 t: @Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)9 J3 h' N+ S/ m" c- k8 u
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
/ K5 }" K/ O: E% |) O0 [: O; nHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)( k. |9 N& O$ ^: {* m
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! n3 {! P" A8 n$ o; p2 K警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。; ~: [/ p% j+ f8 _7 F7 E4 _" P
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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- u3 H/ v5 X4 z接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
# W1 q- I/ o& u0 {0 u; q话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
8 Q8 ^+ G$ p8 P4 b) J0 \3 vHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
7 S; e' ^" x4 B/ w! jWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)1 h5 N5 \! a+ L
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)0 ]0 p9 B: ?/ ~5 L; f: K6 e  a
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
# m6 ]$ K" h# X7 B1 `  AWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
0 f  t! n  q% [0 UHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)0 E, P: K7 U) u+ ^, H3 y
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
) `+ }2 m) S: {5 [& vHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
6 y9 ^4 L3 t: a0 I3 \2 nWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
7 l0 t& O7 j; v' X* Q% Z8 XMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)/ b7 d$ x; J$ |' p7 P
WatsonHolmes放了下来。)  x- I. ], |- \! e! U0 e
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; d' B3 W; @0 z. _& q% A- @- L总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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