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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。
! A+ }7 _& X% n, Z* B: r1 L6 sWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。). b$ C+ m% V2 m& Y0 H4 R
Holmes: I just picked it up.& b! N) a) {7 B' ^+ P5 q0 a0 n
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)+ ~& a8 u8 p' K& j6 G& E
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.& Q- Y- ~( p# l, M6 p5 O- Z, i
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)  p7 E/ w& v7 h! T: I$ c, I; m
Holmes: You did.* l3 l" b. b% z! M
(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)3 M8 y2 s3 W7 w4 r) n* f2 h5 }
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.) H% v- w8 U/ S
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。
' A+ g. y$ k* b9 h* e2 Y2 o; PWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
) Y8 a$ b; _7 F+ {* E9 nHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。% v& }% |+ v2 F8 E2 H
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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9 [* q4 R2 a2 M. r3 ?  U* e# D* z拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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, h! F, C; q# o5 D, pWatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。, j7 g2 s+ k& b
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。6 l# R1 N# G7 D: g: u, X9 A
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes3 c: w3 C% ]- W
Irene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措): Z! m' `$ O  Y
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
) d3 f, f. g% nHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)$ s! ~4 D- g2 C/ K1 y7 ^- l$ D
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。) G9 h5 T) X: I) w6 h
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)3 h& }# j' p) Z" p) ^- U
Watson: Get that out of my face.( y0 _# j, h: r! |& B
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
- {7 ^3 b* F% s, ]2 ^  OWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.5 p+ Y* {5 K& R4 Y6 Y
路人警官Clarky上场。
7 Z/ e7 m9 }9 i8 b7 E2 J) aClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
9 E& }, u6 n% q9 I% s8 CHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
8 E9 h) x7 `  v; }2 ~7 _得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。0 D. l# u! M. z. i+ ?% e
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
/ u5 W" \3 }2 ~0 R4 d! v  W, q4 \Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.5 u- ?# D1 j, w4 G) b* Z: R
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. R9 w" y9 U' f% T! {- B! S墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。2 L& n; K" o" ]0 w; s* W' f
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)
8 H5 b  H0 }$ `& M# L2 YHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
$ h! V2 V7 c- S: NWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。9 P+ v4 O) G4 A' ?7 k
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
; z. e3 G0 S2 z4 j* v. |$ h. h- TBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…, I) c1 L& ], y3 ^) G6 ]  H8 p& [6 U
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)  K# J4 f" y, h% N" \; ?) C
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
0 b0 m. a+ ?/ v9 s* O4 _2 gHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
& J/ e) M. q- Q% ~+ }后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
1 s2 G, |: |: j1 P6 y0 T) MHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)6 ]! V! ^; b% ~% d' D# p
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。- y( p8 t1 `7 c  ~
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.- |& F$ U- n# l$ M$ C" J/ L
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+ G2 U9 S' W* ?6 v7 e* ^接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。; c1 c/ L7 z0 u7 a
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。) }  ?/ ^: f* {
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
* E4 ~6 r& I1 o/ {9 N0 J& oWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
4 i& d& s% D- j* Z0 gHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)  @9 L$ J4 f& x+ B' {
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?- [  M4 Z7 G6 S3 m
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。). |0 A. Y- S. `  K) z/ n, W
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)! h  M# Q- \& j0 v3 L1 l' P
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
/ J- X' p7 S7 C. W2 f1 w! R  u- T- WHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)* N! X1 B8 ^$ r- Y
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
0 z" h. l; c# |Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
. i  _& g! f& y, ^( k% @3 rWatsonHolmes放了下来。). `( n2 H9 ?2 z* c  }
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6 {4 S' X) e( N3 G& B! b总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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