 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 * A5 f! i0 t$ Z
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 4 A% q7 D% F# S/ B: b3 e* o' Y/ ?
Holmes: I just picked it up.% q; C$ B: c1 c, h4 Y/ Z
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
9 I' b, [% i2 d8 X. kHolmes: Knew I forgot something.( H7 ~+ m" _# D7 Q6 @* C
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 5 k( h! Y' `' _4 m. q% N
Holmes: You did.2 d% \6 g$ O' h
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 0 _0 I6 X: L8 Z! L, R' K
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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5 f: k1 Q7 |' h {8 p5 l宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
$ P. e; \; B( ?0 T( t# BWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
1 {' X* N$ O6 @ b5 q1 pHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
0 n( O8 T7 F/ |( Y( S$ t$ eWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) # @; M; y; ]# G* H
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ' v& q9 [0 C. r+ J, I! H/ N, f1 v
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
5 P- n5 d9 K# w3 jWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) & A# }. b0 E+ y& l0 I: o
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6 o" ^7 E/ `7 Y/ j2 p9 qHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 * r+ i. }! w+ a- K
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, h: ^1 W+ K$ |% yBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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: ^/ a2 y- p3 P$ J `% l* \Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 / M& i) [! i$ ?/ E
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) + ]! f! b7 X3 L+ `( A
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?+ f. t$ Z8 n4 l. @. {
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 7 h- a" p: E4 A3 x- q- G- g: j
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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- V R3 ~% J5 f$ i- AIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 & x. \5 Z: m% P( y1 p8 o
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) 0 j: I, {: f) J3 O
Watson: Get that out of my face./ h- U$ M V/ x8 x4 x% i" v+ _+ p
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.4 A5 _$ U1 \8 ?0 T, ^, W- f l' K
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.+ Y% ~( U2 G/ U% v/ v) ~
路人警官 Clarky上场。
* |! p: q" p1 k; k, p* s: u5 o! QClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
H: y' [% I: I+ \Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
( N3 Z& U: V, B得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ) ^" R" Y& H$ e2 \% N; y
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?7 [9 @* Q+ z( i: G0 \ p4 }% ]
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.8 t+ C2 W. E& C! T
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 " M4 B) Z2 ^, q( q/ w% U
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) . h3 [" y# |/ ^) x
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely. U! G3 d |0 d+ W% O( m' j, @2 l
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) + k/ ^% Q* U* `5 D; Q4 b
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
4 g: Z3 ]9 }1 q: J4 pHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ) \" J/ K4 E$ N# C$ y9 k u6 c
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…# e1 o/ Z* p% t ?+ ~
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
4 a% ?% Y+ ?: c0 M$ S7 P死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
+ i: ~5 [4 E# D. Z5 ?Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) ; F' x7 c; h6 g% c5 u3 |7 ~, C
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 9 K* [8 [1 I$ J u9 i8 U7 T1 U
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
; Z$ i/ l1 X" m' _6 H2 YLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.3 V7 R3 B1 Y/ ^) u2 q2 X1 C) j# K5 C
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6 n4 e. m& }9 q接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 & n! [. C8 B" B$ u) ~: f; t w
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 $ M6 v/ z( i& M7 @# F
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
, [; S$ l8 @; x" }4 c, kWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
$ j( L" j* i, ^8 ^; d/ ~Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
3 ]* O' d. v% x, n& j2 dMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
7 E; Q5 ^: r" V- G* S8 kWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
7 |8 K+ J2 t* x7 CHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) - I& x* v6 w7 R1 p: ?1 l6 }
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) - i; ^+ X5 W% _3 z o; a$ x
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
: Q `6 W' ]% ^# ?7 i8 T; MWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
' v+ J. ?7 b1 B& R; u( |% XMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
* \" X& y* l9 z9 W/ j* t7 G9 Z( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 1 r' Z2 Z# A1 n- J! Q3 O
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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