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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay9 P" Z! j) r0 l1 H/ I) D: g
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4 @. j# M) q! z2 {+ z/ Z. y. M, F$ \1 I影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。
* E$ K0 b' J. r" ZWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)9 j+ h1 k* B( z) d% v
Holmes: I just picked it up.
. E# d6 \! P% x5 a  XWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
* O$ P7 z/ m* _, f4 y; M* K8 _Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
* ?3 F% A( l! \# O' M4 pWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
) S/ x1 E. K- v4 P8 b4 U" V3 o2 NHolmes: You did.
4 U8 I9 B1 r# w8 X/ i(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
( K! o0 {6 F6 w* Y$ KHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。: C. y, g# F/ b# ?# \% F& `( z
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.. O- Z7 J4 _' n8 g. {
Holmes: Granted.- t! b0 {, }+ R8 ]1 [
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。) D5 o% k0 ^3 B1 a& M0 q
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。: M) u6 k! a) _5 B+ t! ?1 p* [
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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) ^5 t' i6 g5 h) f. n( I& @4 rHolmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。" b, g: `, k1 c0 `# o1 \! m3 w
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5 s6 }) c. F" U- }: gIrene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
1 ?7 O1 z0 N3 E/ bIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)+ c: Q% a# Q9 B" A5 }" |, ]
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
- u7 b6 H/ ^- s8 i: O/ }1 E3 H9 iHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)6 H7 f) \; N& l7 e% p9 @& ?
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。% K5 e& a2 K2 _) }% v
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
. ~: ~2 w- y5 q* Z: O6 RWatson: Get that out of my face.& y+ L7 u6 V1 y, l, H1 |* M
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.. e/ ]* z/ I% v$ w$ O% W
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.) f  u3 _' V" Y$ F4 X
路人警官Clarky上场。
, F- l" Y& @/ C) P2 @% EClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.6 K$ L; i/ y; f
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
/ a+ o) O8 q; D; C) Y得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。/ y( v- y; k, q6 a+ S% C+ l$ t
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
' w3 U' C: `/ hHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.* s9 Y: S3 g* U/ K
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墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
' b6 o+ Q( o" \/ j1 G" {( LWatson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)" F, [, |% l# y) f
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.6 u3 e0 O- B+ q5 b% A7 Y* `8 Y; R
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)( C6 f) v1 c5 ^* T, B
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% ^; K: B1 _+ _& N3 ]河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。
, A6 z* k5 g& N) uHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)( ~  r1 O$ `0 r4 o
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…! X/ H1 o0 k. B- I4 ^4 H
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
6 q  z( M$ u; O& K( L" S死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
4 G" d% @, P; q: K& V' W- p1 aHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)- x+ Y  O1 D) ~
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
0 i6 w# ~$ z# L5 C, p+ N1 b+ RHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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6 R; B- @2 b! u6 @$ e$ ]警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。! _3 w3 U8 _" o# N+ U" c: {
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。1 G2 T2 S  u5 [4 V6 o9 {* u
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
$ i& P9 l* j; p3 `Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。): ?, d; ]0 U' n2 E( b" R
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
( U- k& v$ ]/ Y$ }3 x$ j5 XHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)$ q4 A5 D1 m6 p0 t, Z
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
6 d3 \, G- q" D$ ~) q' vWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
1 Z. z" E7 H' WHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)) u: f) m! b' P  ^7 R
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
* X: M- I5 X. Q5 `Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。), `( P) l" d& l6 l9 |" w1 w: _
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
: Y( I9 _) D# A4 X" n) ZMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
* E* G+ E+ X( m1 z6 l! D/ N, ~WatsonHolmes放了下来。): @1 B2 ~* n3 n7 n3 C% ~
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8 l, O+ q7 n4 I  c0 ~/ \总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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