 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ( D$ e- O' U- c' {( N
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 0 z; L0 D: I/ M- d1 t
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 7 e& o9 m6 T( D% k0 ^) }3 B; D
Holmes: I just picked it up." S- H1 G1 X1 I7 S2 c5 R: m
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
. l8 X1 z1 }8 \( L1 C) R1 }# U# c1 XHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
5 y7 G: O4 ^+ J. CWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
6 C* Y2 `3 ?1 xHolmes: You did.) Q2 \# S' ]+ K& f
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 0 r0 F! x0 t) z
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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8 K1 c! r2 s" C% [6 a P: }& X' g+ S宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
9 n9 i3 A6 \! v4 ZWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
% Y/ _9 Q* V+ T) K# eHolmes: Granted.( A+ b, V. U) i; U& S
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9 \) w4 L# O2 p! r- f晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
. {6 g; g3 Z0 Z4 P6 Q9 FWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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7 k, G3 q; U/ M# e拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
5 c5 }3 G3 L P* ^" E: F: rWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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7 i. E# A" ^6 Z' yHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 ; u# O& q# G i
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" x9 y7 X/ W4 ?' ~& z& mIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 % o. d; [0 a* ?/ B' Y& l# R
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 4 e- z2 m* Y; S1 k
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
' D3 w2 m- Z m( W2 T) }Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 7 e) @9 H# p i6 B, i8 u
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 , D9 K. @! [. s3 X
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
" K; g4 B) G3 }9 cWatson: Get that out of my face.
% x0 A$ a5 J; O% O+ ~8 nHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
6 I* {$ r* j* M: n2 I. `; cWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.& e+ f# P5 @, [, t
路人警官 Clarky上场。 6 X- a }, ` p3 g( Z4 w' r9 z, O
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
- c' C0 S0 T& A( ^% E6 THolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
2 d" g+ K! V' K: d得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ; o4 F, z0 m0 @$ p/ l
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?4 m) b6 J1 ]+ R% x! M& O6 h
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.5 i0 g; s( }6 V$ ~ c" O; B
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 9 A. q5 U6 s# O h6 o2 |
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) ( ~& n, X( P& a
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.$ X! Q7 t3 K7 y ^: o
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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1 W7 q* W( @- ?2 T* U( G河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 3 f& H4 \5 F( n5 ]4 t* m0 B
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
6 J) ^: S0 o& @6 x9 x. O+ uBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
% l6 p, A" M- p* o8 VWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 2 Y$ s+ T! M6 m: b' [& }/ ^( G: [
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 9 D3 M% m4 J1 ]0 |0 Z
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) . `# }* ^7 |$ a1 Z! J7 x8 k6 h
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
5 A% ?! S8 }4 J# n9 r1 @8 S; DHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
" k8 G2 S2 R7 MLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.9 |" ^: \% @: C0 W1 C
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
+ U# i1 u6 w9 a) O& h: } l话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 / j# d4 \. { @$ |9 {3 a
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) / |5 V0 F/ s$ E- [
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
' ]# A- [2 @* ~) l, NHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
8 J7 j% m4 Z7 YMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?' ~+ L. |+ s/ H! C# H' d- E
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
+ s" E5 C9 A3 t- z9 c9 xHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 3 N: S$ u! M; k) h
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
6 J8 `; }2 S9 E- T; bHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) * u0 o& M5 P! ?0 O% t) p, l1 l
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) . G9 B2 S/ s) N% e
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 6 l( D. ?+ q) J
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) * s y) p' O5 u4 s8 N
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0 B+ v& V* M5 d; x. {9 s& o/ E: y总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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