 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 / r& a- @9 J$ ], T; l0 F% ]
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# L; u' }! O' `9 o! r/ V影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
: e- I6 E" j4 Z+ x; o7 k0 i& _Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) % h4 P- B! T, F
Holmes: I just picked it up.) S8 I2 w( o3 n4 \: d# k# h: m( B
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
' Z0 D4 N8 ?$ m8 K- G8 R/ GHolmes: Knew I forgot something.+ f2 q4 h7 \: y6 L9 C$ u5 O: {7 |- I
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
9 `3 @1 l3 _+ J, Y2 J# hHolmes: You did.8 @* Y- m6 ^' c1 @. K" ^4 Y+ r+ p
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
- F' Y; D- e2 L, CHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
/ `: g0 }4 u5 qWatson: Permission to enter the armory.1 u! U4 s: R- H7 l
Holmes: Granted.4 r1 N+ u* z8 ?/ s
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- G/ \2 N1 y5 u: R9 U! M$ [晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ) H4 t U7 h1 C, \2 d
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 % Q2 u, l7 k- @6 E9 R9 B
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 ' ]/ v8 O; ^ X& i
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 7 t& B# p1 \6 I" x0 k0 y! Q- I
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, B0 K1 i5 L+ m% c1 _/ \Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 " U6 Z$ ?# [# y5 j& O
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
$ |& b8 F) n. |' O6 B2 jIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?! {! W. P, I* {6 W- V/ o# b7 v2 U
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) , L+ Y6 K6 Y! m$ f$ V6 l
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.- |1 E+ A- o, N: e$ s. t" W! X
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
, G: w/ v0 ~' lHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
. Q7 C* d9 }9 w0 ?% i6 QWatson: Get that out of my face.
9 @$ @) H# J9 y6 `7 {Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.: N0 J! a8 Y+ N
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.: n+ C( P6 w0 }8 x8 d0 }6 I
路人警官 Clarky上场。
4 _# ?( L# C: m" J( W0 j: iClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.7 u% K2 q( `" O$ n+ Z: U4 o- b
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 6 t+ y8 a0 X! J" ?; A
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 + ~- G2 _, K1 S/ V) q, [' A" h
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?/ u0 a% L5 {5 T4 `) p. P
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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" J; k0 j3 O$ t% N/ G W墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 ' ?8 o5 j# P& p3 `* k2 ~4 a
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 4 w' s' _8 N- Z2 Q s7 D
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.8 v" M9 U$ y3 l2 [* k
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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! i1 e! Y/ ?, X) w6 x$ X河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 & j- W% j U4 o8 t3 e
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
% \1 m9 y5 X* d2 Y) Q/ tBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
0 I; n! T; L! U/ `) R' SWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) * A; d% M/ Y9 |5 l
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
R- e2 H6 z$ t2 AHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) " b5 S' J9 @0 n8 {& n8 l. C
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
8 d4 c% j! H& D9 g! j5 ^6 a zHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) - }1 |1 ^! U1 R) O& J; X& x$ \2 N
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
' X$ D7 }6 s l! l5 {Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.2 j7 A: F6 A9 d* a
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# H. C: v$ A" Q& B接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 ) P2 q: o' ]5 [1 ~- F% _2 e0 S
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
1 t. Q! e% V1 [2 Q6 B& gHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
( U$ P4 b' [$ Z' R7 g7 E& b' u0 aWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
/ m" \( O8 ]9 V: w2 j$ RHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) * O9 X3 |) q, h) |5 L" h% f
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
9 ?9 A1 U" |! J7 R6 i5 h2 pWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 0 k' ?6 E* U. M; T$ |! e, B. n
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 4 O# X0 ~9 X$ E& \; W+ l7 S/ M
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
' b d- v$ v% M" J& oHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 5 W9 R5 X; x5 F7 T- l
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
' e: T4 `( [; YMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) / E0 ~% T: A* k, I. W2 q
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) ( Y$ O' H7 \1 t, x
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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