 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 : R, V: D# o7 |+ f0 v! u: Y
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
/ A, q) [4 @1 {Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 3 d# `2 U4 h0 D8 J3 s6 ~) i
Holmes: I just picked it up.
3 Y4 j M: y- oWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 7 Z) K% o7 c" j
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.7 M4 o! b6 ?7 c2 Y: J
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
: {/ X+ d, t' R( t8 \' ?Holmes: You did.
. {( y+ x/ L! e, h+ _5 _(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
% T0 R- z( c: A% g ^" RHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.2 d9 X) t* a" \' N/ Y9 s( F4 n" t
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* S; v- x: v0 B9 P, a- }7 I5 k宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 / Y$ T& S+ H) ~% b5 z% r
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.( t7 X) z! P# P9 C) Q/ |
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ! w( x) e! g. h- H# X9 |2 P3 R3 b
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) . J: U; \' }& J
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! \( C) }4 ~- v6 k拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ' n* t8 T* D, f4 O& T
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% Y" s. {0 J2 z" qWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
5 |. j7 `: y- T& FWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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$ b+ E( K+ m. dHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 & i% V" Z+ r# z9 T9 | ?& `' e; f
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; {$ T- [3 w ?: gBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 - w9 v [0 \# P
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 & \9 x- d* a+ i- B6 V. e! g
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
4 f( E* R5 k' V" PIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?; ~* c/ g2 X F( [ y9 R* c, [
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) . R6 _6 O; S9 {
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.. ^. T `5 M" W0 }- h' Q# c
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" A# V0 ?, q# t6 EIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ) L- r7 B6 J0 V3 K/ p ^/ _
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ; J* G# N- V# Y4 ^3 l: v, x1 e
Watson: Get that out of my face.
2 {7 L- Y. s: a. u, P$ p/ |Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.) @) w8 B- O( O# K9 e7 w0 V
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.6 ^! a# k! d, N9 M% R+ v5 q, b- K
路人警官 Clarky上场。 ; k- \0 x9 Q! R8 J) T
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.) g& |1 @3 p G
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
6 S7 u' m, a' I% F& j得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 1 b7 z- w: ~6 a4 f9 U! X0 Z
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?2 ^5 W8 @1 W- c' ?5 `7 l% p
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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7 a+ o, H% j p# T墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 , P2 J* A! W/ e S1 n4 U' Z
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) ) v- }, i, V/ C) |
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.1 `4 V: H5 k+ H$ A# x- _
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 2 l2 f7 ?4 V7 v* u* _
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) " b" N2 f$ W3 c" c5 p" N0 Q
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…3 E( c2 @" H4 |0 F& }
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
: z$ M8 Z. p( T& k& l3 r死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
) U9 w+ d8 v5 e9 i* v7 t- {1 s: n/ qHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 0 O l, t1 n% w- y! R5 N3 m
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 : u% x; n! g" n
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) % N" }& O7 e4 c! c
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
& Z" G+ x V9 e, |+ PLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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, x7 s' p! ~7 P# U# a接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
9 G; j% R/ C( X1 L& A, J话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
$ g5 d" K: L' d- |Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
: M M& H& q# R$ AWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
) v H% o9 k0 `4 lHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
) T. N2 P- A( F2 \Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
0 [* I1 _+ b# a+ O, l& PWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
0 v! Q9 o& a, S8 i2 a3 EHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
% |0 {. d8 ]# QWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) . ^% [0 [0 G1 c
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) + t, S8 a8 N% S! }4 P4 x
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
% b3 z6 s) {5 [: R% ^Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
) p7 D- S1 S6 R- o( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 7 i+ j8 m5 F. k, F& R9 c7 i
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) B" a2 \% F# r8 p总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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