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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。
, _1 @: D7 T( S9 A  e& q8 lWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)1 Z" y! Z  X( w- [
Holmes: I just picked it up.# ^0 a1 Z8 M& a* _/ W
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)4 L3 ^& @; b2 {0 ]7 c
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.# S& J% J9 \$ g
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
) A* e3 Y5 e: T2 B- IHolmes: You did.
. {8 M  [* C: H' b0 u* F1 g(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)7 t, ^  J8 }7 [9 \# Y
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。. Z' [* s- s+ p! c7 X# E5 i
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.  v/ k# v/ Z3 F9 ]
Holmes: Granted.% ~3 ^& A" N1 @7 c* Y0 H. k
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5 }! a6 e4 P/ O* s4 G+ r晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
+ p8 J. ^' D, w! Z" X) YWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)6 A3 w2 u2 T8 D8 z
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/ l  ~4 A: L/ Z拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。. }: ~" s, G: h# \& F/ \4 [
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5 J* m! n0 }& ~7 |WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
# S8 y' f' K% x9 mWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)) X  P1 j) E8 S
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Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。+ A) i! u/ ^& S* M2 ^8 p+ S
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes# _" x) s' [: q
Irene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)3 F# p# U- y- ?* P5 b6 `! B
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?3 g* e+ _" O- O* Y/ L
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)
, r  q) k, p5 \+ E6 r  x- M, k7 h% tIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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$ ?) A5 q& `5 X0 t  W7 WIrene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。8 L0 ?3 h4 B( o" V  Z% L3 c* ~
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
- P7 O! p9 n5 t" b2 _0 @+ P% [9 q; @Watson: Get that out of my face.
9 z  P# N) P6 Y+ aHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
8 F2 w4 U( W$ [& k$ {2 V- R, SWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
6 C4 ~& P. I. _0 B+ ~; c# P路人警官Clarky上场。
/ `+ h' B. q  X5 m# ]3 ]$ m  mClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
& }  `* H, q, U6 y+ \4 t) ]/ E) `Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)5 k9 R  I/ E$ h/ d: @% T$ M
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
% A" g. x0 N+ a( f4 D$ SWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
) [1 M( t. t4 @8 @3 e7 vHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。% A) r$ \) F: l$ z
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)# W) x& }* t4 K6 Z
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.2 x/ P; ^9 I& o, c# }
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。
4 M' S% y9 O; N- lHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
, {/ r( W% e: D3 MBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…9 s+ Q1 m( ~: l- x9 `9 L
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
+ r& J( I9 j  n& j. H- x6 k死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
+ w; z9 `6 i" lHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)" k5 G' K9 x& w
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
( [9 R. z1 b" y8 I$ M' t' IHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)5 o0 R( O; ?! F% m& E
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) ]$ ~9 Q) t$ L6 D9 @  _: h& l& g警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。0 X% ^5 X( h3 V
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
1 s$ u  j4 v: D' p8 K话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。1 G% x' Q6 ]  a3 Y* R$ H5 c
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。), P8 d; k3 {" b) q$ a% q
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)0 k3 M' o0 l( b0 M/ L4 G9 D
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)
: ?; N6 F; \2 _* i! @Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?6 u2 H  l3 I( K$ z5 z3 q4 `
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
0 V0 O: v) |8 J* T6 a. e8 _Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
! h' O8 r# T8 t1 f+ ^Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。). \0 [0 w& I% e( V' X- K
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
+ _6 t6 l) w0 \% Y# n; {Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
! h& B" I1 Z- j* s% a! f6 ]Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
0 V0 r% P3 ]  z) S# ]( |* X+ WWatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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0 m5 Q3 e* F& ^% S9 y总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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