 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 8 ]. e; w+ A- g9 o+ D
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
6 S& c+ c9 B1 ]# {* IWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
) w! M$ R8 x( F; E6 NHolmes: I just picked it up.$ k" R* e7 B& @5 t
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 3 o) Y& C6 t+ ? o1 Y$ E
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
7 K3 U( }3 N+ g X1 z! T9 OWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
; l8 K+ _/ i: D7 V THolmes: You did.( r* P' L, t: S
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) ) N* x$ e1 \1 o# O$ \
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
$ }6 ^0 f2 J) x/ t6 x, a2 vWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
* H& e! ?9 g; t3 o- U3 v' iHolmes: Granted.
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: c# t$ q; n' {: Y8 H晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
- V/ ?1 ~3 P; X' c% eWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 0 a9 z1 z( E& G+ l
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: y" ?! d# V) D# x& f% N! }拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 3 s- [4 M; p# R
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; _; Z3 N) \- k: D! I: I3 {4 F$ gWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
- A6 g. p0 ~3 s/ ^+ c; PWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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' M9 s0 D! ^- @: YHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 ! S9 Q3 t7 o, R5 u7 b4 F* Y) U
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
3 d' x* i, I3 }' j( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ( v* ?3 C. c7 o
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?/ M1 M, D) V. }+ A
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
0 j, p& I" R( ]' L- z& O; j# f5 {* GIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
( \" ]0 Q$ T2 U9 E( GHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) + F O! ?5 {' i6 v& t& ^1 @
Watson: Get that out of my face.
8 F- v& e# P: K; oHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
1 h; p1 }3 w9 P# OWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.6 Y/ @. }- w4 J6 ?( ?% C
路人警官 Clarky上场。 8 m6 d& a* N* T/ b/ a
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
+ j c' ]3 j# v m) xHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
5 T$ b" |. f+ c1 T3 [得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 3 a% E, T1 n7 }) f
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?7 @- a: H( K, N0 X( [( c" Y
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
( a2 e: o/ g& K5 P& F7 G! X( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
: c! v( _; \5 ~+ @5 _Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
; V. d# [; _0 T c$ z* G* rWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 " o) x9 _& [+ S' }* {8 p
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 4 z$ x, N1 R( F7 M1 A
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
! {: D* f D' c8 W/ W# IWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 9 `: w* R5 \5 b6 V5 w
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 / R0 Y6 ~3 v" q3 u: A. h& W W9 _
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
. T9 l! y; V/ {0 Y后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
! x: f1 ]0 ~. e9 z/ y; IHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 ( A( B+ g2 j9 h
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.5 D% w" E c$ i- o. N/ g
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/ f( U/ z! I8 H+ U8 d: o. U6 J* \" V接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
7 f3 [) D: ]' U7 w7 ~; @7 A话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
, Y! g6 ]' X1 `! F* A" nHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
' L1 M1 \5 n) C5 I% jWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) - r- @: A; M( k$ t/ w! ?3 B
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) , I5 p$ I+ _9 C3 r( Y1 o1 t, `# H4 [
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
# r" s. X6 H" m5 [6 JWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ) v3 z- |1 J" T) J. V3 k
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 8 P: l e' h$ R" Y7 O" j$ Z# p
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
2 N; k6 d& F+ t$ Y- [ }Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) & ]$ N6 \" S5 C4 H @# I
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) / }: V. H+ w' j# ?2 y" }
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
1 h4 }+ o7 F/ L6 A- b4 Y( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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