 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
i" Z& Y- w: r% _4 \7 ~Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
7 _) q, Y1 V# ~& G9 r1 jHolmes: I just picked it up.9 {6 V9 g3 D/ {
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) ! `" g! ~+ x; k9 j$ ]3 G1 @4 y
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
! o! P Y4 `# F/ L. |1 _+ K8 sWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
- ~8 k. m! `. x- b& x: M; T8 EHolmes: You did.5 m4 |* {. n' g8 X
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 1 X9 ~9 M8 K$ ~- a1 \3 S- a
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 * Z7 M3 ^% j' @
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
/ e0 ~3 c: Q% c$ U& yHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
. q" X8 Z" w2 w0 ~ eWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) - r& ]2 j7 n7 b7 T, P
4.
! J6 z# W3 U1 i# J0 }1 E5 n! e拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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& c n) F. Q/ K9 _( ?" uWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 . b9 ]' k! d! y6 E
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) + t$ c* P4 L p9 k
6.
: n$ S0 }1 ]$ N* H; J; g2 YHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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9 t" z+ l- o2 \+ X. v7 ^% \$ XBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 1 X) l- W# s. [
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! C! n$ a; L, J: kIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
0 F8 ^4 h1 Q" ]4 A3 m3 p( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
% F0 Y7 b6 R' |5 hIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
. o2 L5 h6 \! J5 y THolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ' [* u0 z9 b; {+ _9 n# \0 m; l
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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0 p( c% S. I1 Z3 {. u' oIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 . t1 X x, Y# Z! {4 ?- }, l+ d
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
5 `0 ?# F9 ?) B z0 }, IWatson: Get that out of my face." ~$ y6 z; B/ `, g4 D
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.1 K( w$ z2 D" L3 U
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.9 m) U8 \4 N. G. f* ^
路人警官 Clarky上场。
, o0 o/ W/ U6 EClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.7 e1 _/ G# y" R' `1 x; O
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 8 Y ?0 H$ p ?) {, U
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
( d4 L. `- R5 `$ C+ x* C* q Q$ zWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
1 X/ n& e W& g% T7 H: ]Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.% C5 ~& \. O7 j0 q: y: O/ R
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( l v& @6 m C Q4 I/ r: i墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 5 G% v" X4 W: s, E
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
4 F8 w( x7 Q! [' b% jHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.# i" F1 b, s. g& s
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 9 t& c9 V- l6 ]5 J
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 N" M3 q) j& F% z4 j, p7 _6 }1 k
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
1 E& ^7 e! x, T& uBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…2 Y+ o( Z5 Y9 I, U5 [6 \% d. b
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
4 h( r" u' [6 C* o3 x4 t: P5 b+ n死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
) w! Q6 W. Z, f4 DHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 2 D6 w( ?& c5 _1 _7 ]
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 " C' v' g0 z) J* l! O" d
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) # w& y! O5 ]. @. X; T9 U# ]
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: z- b% b; k* a8 p警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
5 |; F( i7 m, rLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
7 ?5 r7 R6 W, H8 y( f. f话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
9 X" r, D% R3 b# p+ U9 xHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
4 j- F. }3 S& v0 w* LWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
2 m# f9 F0 y+ [" e8 \* A* }Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
, ^/ |+ e5 S3 Z6 I }: aMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?0 ]9 S+ y6 l. A4 H7 D6 I7 M8 F
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ) Q! t5 z! M# j+ G4 H. R
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) ! E* ^, Y& _: C3 X
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) ; X9 b% e0 R- j8 X% e# l8 F
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 5 O6 v: R) ]7 W$ G& a. S
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
2 X7 V+ e( \; B: a) e7 aMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
* [1 ]! _, y" r$ |( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) ; n. J1 C1 A- \$ C
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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