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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。- v, U' r3 s1 W" ~8 n
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)1 ?& q' j4 n! q* ~( J0 m
Holmes: I just picked it up.0 z. Y* Y) n& Q
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)4 U' J' m/ _1 T8 `% Y
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.1 D/ E& ~6 ]# d7 r/ m& j
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)2 y8 z. i$ P( u7 U' O4 x, I
Holmes: You did.
& [% x+ ?& `; {2 y+ I(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)/ J5 ?( e) u" P" d6 q# p6 ~4 o
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.7 k- T8 e7 e7 n
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。; B, R( C$ @! N7 ]4 x3 d. I4 Y' V
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
) t/ k' [+ r" u8 e  D  p% aHolmes: Granted.1 l1 R+ ]8 Y: p9 L* H, d6 b
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
: q& n" i5 q* p3 @7 ^& VWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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) ^0 L- I- y* ~- {拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。6 k- z2 T6 X2 z' z3 A) [9 g
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WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
* k3 x% ]; l; m+ x1 x1 o  MWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)7 `1 H7 M- v( E/ I0 p
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Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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* e7 z, U$ u$ M" l, ^6 G* H5 qBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。' i/ y- |/ P5 y! u! s! x& p
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
1 c" l6 u  y. D! p7 xIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)4 t( I4 [: D2 G6 F9 Y9 p
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?# @1 D! M- C, j$ l" U8 T
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)
8 D7 i% v6 c7 ^: S# j1 `( ^/ E9 pIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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  ^" Y& z+ z0 p( j4 Q" zIrene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。; h( j% d4 O6 |& `$ |$ f- M4 j+ y" U
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
# E3 o- S" @. J/ g# x; V% m1 TWatson: Get that out of my face.
2 f4 m7 O+ M# a/ K  VHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.5 e" x/ T  H0 N% P
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
) B8 i( B7 |/ f: ?$ A路人警官Clarky上场。% E" |! ?0 ]$ ?' G2 \
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
3 k6 `6 B; t: zHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
4 E+ U0 y1 n- X+ C得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
0 L6 s* h7 u: b4 V4 SWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
/ R- ?, f; w7 u# cHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.8 X0 Y. B# t7 {0 F7 M7 d
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! o/ M5 d% I- @- x6 g3 ?$ M& x9 B墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
. \( G. K% D9 i" d) uWatson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)
9 J' E4 p9 e# nHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely., r* n% i( s6 z' Q
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)1 L4 ?3 o, N+ l% J! p9 `& m
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* \" W, g+ R9 W' d% N" \, n% E) K0 C河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。& A% }9 e4 i& p) }7 L2 h$ y
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)- Z/ D) [' A# M
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…" w8 h. F2 A6 U/ G% t2 B
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
8 d+ ?( @) m# ^  \死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
4 a- u& ]) L4 i8 X6 r% mHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。). E% K" `1 c5 ~3 L  a* D4 m, C9 [
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。" j' d7 A9 v1 T3 Q) y' Q
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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. ^+ D8 _. S; T0 a' |( k  _9 ?警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
  g$ u; t/ {# DLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.$ m' w- x; ~8 K- W
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。7 @; {, v+ J$ ]
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
9 m& g4 ~( U2 a+ l4 ?Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
) V  j3 l8 e7 ^  |6 G! W! f$ eWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
* E6 ?5 O0 P" A1 t; OHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)+ a. Z6 M5 X6 t2 e# F3 f
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
# P- Q# f- ^; [* G/ T+ u4 TWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。); H% C2 O6 {3 b& [
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。); ?! X" g& u4 {. N
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
0 `9 o$ M: d1 c6 a: g" ], w0 zHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)+ ~9 F: [! j9 b' O2 u0 h
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
" K5 |/ k& n$ z, q8 ^7 sMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
, }: s. P* e! g" K9 XWatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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# _$ J7 e5 V4 r' v: u' g总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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