 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
9 q% I. q! ~1 r% C2 X4 ^***********& E& C) }% S. t3 l0 w5 W
1.
8 Q# e5 G9 x2 S. Z, G; T% l/ H3 }' r$ P影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 ' Z/ g$ m6 Z! Z3 Z8 H" f! E
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
9 N. K0 F2 U- |$ `3 AHolmes: I just picked it up.
' W+ F: [* p* c+ @ ]0 [7 E# h% fWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
7 h- i2 f) m2 OHolmes: Knew I forgot something.6 T" R3 Q7 f. e
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) + E h; k) q9 f$ S! B( a
Holmes: You did.
5 K. \! a1 t- b( C. s7 _(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
5 d4 j9 A S' T8 J* kHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
& K/ B1 t1 q! k( [% A; }' K1 B2. 8 N3 v& X+ E, Z9 K, W1 ?# Y! c
宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 J! t0 {* g+ b" u- H
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
% R+ w7 S3 {. }! E0 |8 R; {2 e! DHolmes: Granted.: l! c2 H2 }4 [5 E' a
3.; j X. u' v. n# C# k
晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 6 k8 p% P$ H4 R0 c. f, h
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) + z/ m. D2 n* u6 \6 v6 k& R% @' s
4. 9 j: b( i' F! ]! H3 a0 P
拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 % O. R" O6 L: u$ ]) w+ [0 S
5. 3 L# }/ L+ X) y" i
Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
6 t# k# }4 i0 U1 S$ a7 OWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
! f3 E3 Q, u& ^6 M$ y$ t& z1 B+ i$ v6. 7 `# Y' v' b" p/ C
Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
- W5 E6 L5 l9 Z7.
w1 h E( |" @6 B- p$ x; z9 NBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 % s/ v g& h$ Q# N
8. . R( v7 v! M5 Q% c5 @4 W
Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
! @) I$ ^3 x. X5 _& m( K1 j' U( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
/ ~: V" i' H5 |8 X; o& [. eIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
6 R" G1 w6 Q& Y$ [+ C& V4 dHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ) g2 o# X3 }, c, u4 H& v! P! k
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
9 O, T+ t5 M; H$ }. x' I( d9.
3 e; h0 `1 }7 a2 A8 uIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 $ k* r4 Y7 |' Z7 m4 I3 D8 q' ~/ Z
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
( J& q) N; ~. oWatson: Get that out of my face.
% w" r# }6 K: q5 m% wHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
. }( P( M* ^% g3 W/ dWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.0 \/ w% F* A0 o/ O" ^- d: S
路人警官 Clarky上场。
; Z) E# ]% `% d9 XClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
H b7 o8 s1 c4 i4 ~1 n7 ZHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) : {5 Z% s2 ?4 a0 h
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 4 t8 F# A2 D: R `% L$ l! |2 m# Q
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
. ?" J+ P: y& ~6 X3 _Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.2 m& ?& G8 k! k6 X7 Y1 o# g
10.
* p# b0 h( ^, v8 e墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
3 i, x7 a4 t% b$ k0 G8 }2 e; v( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) ! v5 |! o I8 L( Q2 R& q: ]! U
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.7 |$ F0 Z* Y1 f4 @
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) + R' b$ r0 Z- _. z6 S) Z( t
11.
# P8 t, S$ }7 _' ?河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
( e) V5 x: P* }. J; w. BHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ! Q3 g% R$ [) M7 ^4 ~
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
! U- }' m, q! X: E2 a7 o EWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
) [' O0 f2 M6 V) v死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 d/ j: ^: C1 H5 T5 B
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 8 x; w' b1 S3 Z% \$ K
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 1 M& _6 n8 G; K4 C& L3 C
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
* w5 ?. O8 H- I2 [3 z5 L12.
! ~1 z3 r# a) M3 @警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 / q. x+ `7 e7 ^$ _8 F! L
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
/ y2 ~5 n3 S4 D. b13.
- S7 k) o6 R: ^! ~5 f$ u接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 2 v/ w2 ^4 @" e2 Y
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 $ z/ N! B4 H2 q& y5 b: a/ I6 n
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
6 B/ p% E4 d4 xWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 5 c: |& h4 b2 ^7 N8 r
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
) A \" J4 y- d) k2 _Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
" v/ J$ d2 r5 b7 N4 {3 ]Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
4 E$ C" \% U) o; a F$ ~* F5 YHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
* [! y0 x5 H1 K( xWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) : ~1 ?$ w1 z- y! {5 P8 e! k
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
! ^) f: n! g$ @9 N3 tWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
3 q5 f! @: ^! E5 q6 jMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
/ @$ `2 K5 L4 H8 y, ~" T( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
6 K' Y. K% M/ E/ S***********
: e* d( l. a3 U) A总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
| |  | |  |
|
|