 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 8 J3 u+ S$ {/ \8 v
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 8 e: q) B' X2 l
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
' o! ]" \5 h3 yHolmes: I just picked it up.* j7 O2 ]$ a3 k3 R8 P
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
) s+ E: q9 k: M& K) _* THolmes: Knew I forgot something.5 e; b, D1 x: H; L# I6 [+ w
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
; S U# c: |; s2 FHolmes: You did.
$ g- x! l \2 f' t- X(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) ; }, W4 d5 ^+ ^7 i+ [* J
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.5 e: u$ I& k! e1 k: F' e* Y
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ]$ J o9 a4 W. R3 Q3 r$ U
Watson: Permission to enter the armory." j2 C" ~: Z; @
Holmes: Granted.) n' l" _, s1 N3 F! T& u
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; }1 o% a" }; S' R$ q晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 $ M7 w/ d! l( m8 G2 @
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) & _+ B7 A& u# e* F% T& P; N
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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, I& M0 W0 ~* RWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
+ I Z: f# B2 O1 V+ `' [, A8 uWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 7 h1 U a, K; N2 c( s
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9 G+ C) M+ d+ D7 T5 ^+ c5 ~Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 6 I! z* ?& n: q5 M
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 2 j3 g( w9 P1 l; d* b
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
9 Q* ]7 o3 J2 n" n5 M. l( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
2 S4 }: o( j0 E D c+ e% XIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?6 |2 t8 B" j8 m) I* x
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ' J; G/ d6 d% O
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.# B3 R8 g7 Z+ @1 I! S. _8 S
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1 G) B% v# ~3 k8 M J* bIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
, ^" g& ]) @4 ?: f9 w3 q) q. JHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
& @$ y1 ~1 f6 E$ h. HWatson: Get that out of my face.
% h, G' `1 F2 p: u+ F/ ^- [Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
( T. [$ K. @+ _6 |! J+ N4 @9 O0 U7 bWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.& H" l; G+ K+ n; b" r( I% Y
路人警官 Clarky上场。
% i5 D# G& b0 L$ |$ hClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
" \( e b! }$ I" Z/ UHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
4 R- _" b8 h8 |* @6 i0 T( N# T, k得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
; {9 v7 v+ t2 GWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
2 X$ U; S8 g' x4 qHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 7 a Z7 a: s0 j) t) K
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) ) X8 [8 W! Y" H2 n
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.1 n* s, n0 I# K1 P: n6 b; |
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 2 k" C4 T) s: M
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5 R6 Z' S Y( J河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
% t. r& @1 P& ^ E* L+ OHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 2 I+ G+ r: K) R. {/ {1 j
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
7 R8 n* u6 N x, L4 T, jWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
* i( ?# w S1 a7 S3 ]) M死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 2 j& B3 L6 _) H* w* a7 c
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
/ P& S* |5 A+ B- n9 A) j: c+ v后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 ( `! W4 r7 K. g6 z
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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- H9 D, B2 s8 H# N+ R警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
7 h* ?' m; S3 ~9 x9 S5 NLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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3 G7 A( M$ a, x/ C2 {接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
+ H+ y0 A8 Q) y, p- O [: B5 `话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
0 G- h' _% @7 x# K( FHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 8 v4 |3 S* P* O' O
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
/ m1 [, b: m4 i% B5 [Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) 9 f8 ^9 S+ |/ q5 b) M2 u
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
7 v# }' a% r* ]" B' k( Y* \Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) * F5 w* V4 h/ }2 a
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) : B+ ?- t1 ~; ], n# U1 _/ ~
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 6 J6 A2 V1 P o
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
! C, r) n: u V% u7 `; d# }Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) ' ?2 v! R K' d9 {6 b) Q
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
: E$ {, N$ ^5 B( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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