 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 # ^, p ~# \+ t
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" k; J8 d, p3 d1 e+ H ]* _1 ]9 d: ?影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
4 {5 m; G( K0 Z2 d, o8 X- E: P! WWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) & b S' W3 g( R5 f
Holmes: I just picked it up.
2 _6 }: W( m& }0 |0 @8 e* pWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) % `9 a0 Y3 u9 x. |: ?* F
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
; V6 u/ T' k" C# P5 S3 x, wWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
3 y5 i$ p4 e' N9 Z+ aHolmes: You did.1 p2 l. H' x G$ d8 J$ R" E5 ~
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) / m5 q! I, c8 S- m- c' l( i
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.1 ^( T" H4 h6 J: {$ l
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ) T8 a$ d) s0 B0 A! L$ I
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
3 @* ~- \- M9 v% B' a! @Holmes: Granted.2 N. r4 G2 G! U2 ]" d
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3 S$ q7 a" G8 d+ m+ z晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
( k6 A7 X5 `. c! k" cWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) - u+ k7 q% k6 M* L" t
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) O6 s8 U' H4 A+ S2 F. E拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 " y, Y- Y8 M2 z' ?: r$ {. o- {
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 3 o- C3 K* o- k) P
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/ x5 J4 X( Y% VHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 9 t, a: r9 M) B& S5 t& T
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' q( Y; ~6 K' ?# b$ Z) xBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 # m" d) m; J4 H
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6 R& N' Q1 _- s. j+ v+ Z% E8 T! yIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
# b. y" s- @$ g" E z' u/ b( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
9 A( W9 ^0 s4 p$ ^0 m' D4 KIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?; J; `/ C6 d! @
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 1 }% w4 {# B5 ~7 J
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope. G6 q( M/ ]2 M: ]
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$ L9 m* I# m3 P$ S- W3 l! ]) AIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
% t3 M g( k' z j2 t1 g% ?Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ! e. k' P9 e- B8 c& b7 F# Q
Watson: Get that out of my face.
" c* J. O% \( S; qHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.4 V+ {& @8 n' G& N8 Y
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
, S% g2 i$ W8 T; j' ~7 Z路人警官 Clarky上场。 ( e9 h- G3 o+ |3 S
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once." \& C" R$ z: Q$ K
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
" I# `8 ?, z: O得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ( o0 y8 ^5 \: t/ [. |
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
, l8 P- W) w- [Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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/ j5 N0 o" [4 d! E) y' U4 |墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 - ` r7 ?3 x8 e1 G3 B3 b: r9 A9 a
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 5 v: ?- E- x: _9 N8 F( v
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely." I% l: I- |+ s. g4 T5 A H
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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9 U/ v, q7 I) g8 k' K Z& y河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
" y* j" P8 n% `0 G3 KHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
( V+ a! ^$ L/ w; o Q+ m* [Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
. B# K* i) i( M: H% JWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
4 F' w, P/ |( D1 H6 n! ?% ]1 q死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
- _& _3 F. S0 I6 _; B( g! {% v) P1 qHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) , ~3 X% k5 ^) _5 }, i$ k- T3 D
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
. v ?" e6 a0 Y# ]" }Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
2 Z" m0 ^$ W8 u4 g$ c nLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.; F4 b6 n2 ^) P: K
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
0 q9 p5 t2 w8 u& k2 d9 d话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
2 j% L: X* { r, h1 NHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
1 ?0 e8 E8 Z8 k# [5 tWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
4 Y" ~3 u# x: V; s% L. |2 T; @& NHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
( o+ Z8 _0 _1 b" T2 W$ vMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?. P4 U6 y0 x' ~1 d/ P6 r
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
, |9 m+ B' U+ K6 v1 Q: R% LHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
, ]% h, `6 v" n6 f- N+ e; wWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) - U: B6 J4 B! h( y& l$ o$ {
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
6 F% d' o1 ~: z* p. Y6 v, M; EWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 4 H! i Q& H9 W: _5 c. s
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
3 x! w: ]' o& F( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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( t, p% }, M) \0 T* p, `总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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