 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 5 B$ |2 l. h3 H: [: w, o* q; P
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) + Q- Z; ~' R8 ^7 g7 W7 H
Holmes: I just picked it up.
7 U/ Z1 p* J5 o' I+ NWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
3 ` Q: Z A( E" X: F; t, G% \Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
" h4 r. l% U: U' AWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 4 l5 L$ j- D1 Y% C
Holmes: You did.8 {* X2 ?, @1 O) S
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
$ I1 e$ R5 ^; ~8 [) \- f& UHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.- ^ q3 R/ n/ |
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ) V; A: v( k. ^
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
. d3 E' i1 u5 {Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
0 p* M! m/ R3 s) O1 mWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 5 [% j7 i1 a+ W) {4 A! {
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" S4 w* A' J, Y# _; e% A% lWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 , N; O# m: u$ |
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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) w# \' H7 ^# F% t1 [/ UHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 , y# Y) P. Z& O" h
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 " `5 p! |# z. k M! b
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4 s8 x1 {7 O/ R8 f7 iIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
+ U1 w! i3 L$ z9 E! ^( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
z1 x P0 @! G2 ~Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?$ A5 E# C4 C s% z, e/ ^( y# e' C s
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) : K6 I1 o7 H* s: B* n
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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5 c* H# W$ P( l' W* J+ w1 L5 SIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
5 Z6 Z& ?0 j1 Y5 C* N4 cHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
2 M9 S3 ]& ?% B, Y6 E* \+ GWatson: Get that out of my face.$ l X: i. l! K" {3 X
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand. Q5 A- f5 L5 X1 x! F4 Z4 I
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.9 Z8 `. j" i8 t- Y9 F9 Y+ S
路人警官 Clarky上场。 - w9 W3 s: _5 J& ^" d
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.) Z |8 W3 w; Y3 e* b' X4 d
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) ( M. u% Z+ O3 B0 ^- F/ o% S3 I
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 2 h6 v, k$ W+ `: E6 S! q
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?! s& w A- w* {$ F, z$ o
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
( ^) F5 a+ k% R) ?( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) : h3 i( ^0 f8 T3 N1 k
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.: Y o1 v" I9 f
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) + a1 f# ], j6 E9 L
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 1 f7 |. N! F. _4 c
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
" }) E; W3 {- s8 gBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…7 b* X- m1 a% \5 U0 ^
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) ' v; t+ S9 y0 `# g
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 ; L, O" a! x! ?% ?3 E7 T
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) / h8 @: q4 t, w, \ b ^
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
# ^8 H4 c" @! VHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
/ |* K! X4 I* O3 n. KLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.- H7 U# A7 J/ Q3 |0 |
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: _! w) J5 U# f+ j. u1 d3 Z" }接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
2 k* [8 V9 X* h话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
4 o s. q- E& B" rHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
9 Q/ B' C5 J1 h* aWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
0 c- O; K$ A$ k2 G! r4 Q _Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) . g7 W) g8 Y4 g9 n
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?' e# R0 v; J* k/ P
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) # j; X$ a; b" {2 i$ |. w, W" k; d
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
* l+ |$ g: K% e& RWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
* N- X0 O/ M4 T' x& w9 ~# K2 lHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
0 N( N+ ^- n* xWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 9 p+ `+ `8 ~/ q' p& v2 L7 z
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) / ]; l- W; v( K# b5 l' z- P0 @- w
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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