 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 # i/ f% @5 x7 X t
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 $ i/ E& q3 ^4 @" h2 h9 @9 k) B/ R6 \
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
: {/ h& e$ A g$ _( y/ NHolmes: I just picked it up.8 r' F) p4 F4 r S: T/ H
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) " e& z0 e, ^- R; @0 F" k2 H
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.3 k Y0 z3 k* g; N
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
- b& T4 U' V% f1 t9 f8 g1 sHolmes: You did.* Y2 u; a/ g8 u& q0 m4 ?7 ?
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 0 a( o5 W1 s* p' O3 X' T+ W
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.( N8 H g6 @ q: {9 X0 ~
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- C$ X! o( K9 w: R5 p宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
5 R/ p( l* a @4 T0 SWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
; e6 `! L0 g; T9 q0 H' w: N/ Z- t( F; rHolmes: Granted.' Z s2 E6 q* k8 M" }+ z7 a& j
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
" V. `2 b2 @5 DWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 9 y& \" r" [) M
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 * o2 J2 k7 X" M) X. d
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 ; i8 u) X) V$ f) T% I! ^& R/ R2 `8 `
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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8 D0 l9 S" O# mHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 a, R- o7 V7 y3 j# O6 m: a' I1 b
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 8 r N% W' z0 h3 M( L5 d
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
" G3 b1 J; G3 O. UIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
1 `' f" F2 J* J; }- \9 O! sHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
* A, p2 P: Z* t6 c: ^1 \Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.; @6 a# C! f2 X
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
) p: c8 K0 X8 }# VHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
( B+ Q2 E6 ?" W, c& D6 |7 [Watson: Get that out of my face.$ j X0 j8 [- p/ q
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
7 x. Q5 E( [! s g% E) h% U& |Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
9 w$ p, s8 E4 w$ t路人警官 Clarky上场。 ) g% U3 ~8 @' a: [- S$ U. q
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
$ s8 ]5 c3 a. s3 o5 ?" ZHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
/ ?7 @6 }7 O& o; G5 x5 O% i得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 1 j3 x z+ \; A) d- R
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?5 o, I( V j3 @6 i
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.* L. M) g- [( ?) v! s; @& t
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/ u- ~& B' Z/ F墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 ! V+ b6 @& ?0 N# z4 m
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
8 r8 ^, p" O. k' }( k8 EHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
9 f: l) e: \& x) l8 fWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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' @! ~5 C3 t) V' n# q$ r河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 * H- b3 L/ u6 V2 H! Y2 ?" N h
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
; G4 r1 y0 Z( _+ o) U% m' H9 YBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
" H* O+ o8 p! K/ C; D% vWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
7 S+ S/ {, n9 o" I- V死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 5 } Q# Y. B; O5 {" j! F0 F, T4 V
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
: j; ?9 i \" j- C, J4 }后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
7 _$ m% G1 ?3 v* b: qHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) " Y# H) q' V0 Y
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( {6 o- x$ k5 a$ n/ u. {1 F警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 / p! Y! O7 L/ n1 Y5 {& K
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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' X. x0 \5 c" v. i: ~3 z接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
& }. M _; ^; |$ U( T% T, v( y话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 $ M9 E+ f+ P% I2 N1 d
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
4 I/ t* ]2 i5 D& y5 e8 ^/ IWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
/ }' a2 M7 a* x( y3 |/ n0 ^6 kHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
4 ]) m2 u ]. g. `Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
" h$ K9 W( z9 i" t$ i% d$ Y' A. o) mWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
3 k5 p% S$ I6 z) y! o3 ^. {) n7 NHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 0 ]; t( m& \; t9 f1 n
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
3 d y# f' a- P- | K+ o: J/ y/ nHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 0 e/ e. X- o8 l2 I+ O4 ~
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
/ J4 l9 E" f( y1 k$ W5 F* YMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) + ?7 D. F1 c: }% J
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 0 q& i8 O1 ?* g6 f5 i' V
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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