 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
9 u* s1 f/ `8 SWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) ; W7 Y1 q1 V4 p) _9 q
Holmes: I just picked it up.$ h7 d6 g( n( Y4 O
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 1 s7 Q9 s+ O0 l2 U2 a1 N \
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.8 T8 H5 _' s1 E) r& Z
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
* V1 R1 a' S2 t+ y+ Z; ?Holmes: You did.
{; F* N+ m/ z2 j, P3 Z(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 9 ^* \ A8 R9 z! N0 c: a
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 & }2 u6 n/ O( n0 a! b
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
/ A f9 \3 R- P( o, nHolmes: Granted.
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- M( E. T0 S' h6 M" x: {晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
5 h) e& V& ]: u p7 xWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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* n4 L8 A5 Q4 p9 N: N% \拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 / R/ `; q0 b6 z
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
' f6 j n2 T; tWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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8 L9 t& e' e% K6 q3 [+ |9 s! wBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 4 d: h! w; _5 \5 G$ R% [9 a
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
( p0 Z- M @* m+ e2 e. uIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?' c+ D& L. t9 d! v# m
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
$ p% S6 O) Q* x7 A8 \$ x+ ]; V) ^Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.1 \9 H% l) I( H9 E/ B; R
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 3 \6 c: n3 r B7 G7 o% I3 G
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
. {/ I0 I. g2 ?" G& h+ KWatson: Get that out of my face.; a* i( I7 V+ |( i
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.7 V. R( g2 p4 ?5 Q5 u4 C- B
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
/ b. w, S3 u0 g% Y) N# Z7 E* b% i+ U路人警官 Clarky上场。 9 @/ d3 k4 q( [* d/ @
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.* J/ b( j A) X
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) & S+ Y1 M4 V( U, p: Z: l" f) W1 u
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 " m8 f7 k8 E8 C
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?& ?# K8 M* ~% x7 F
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.$ u" b9 t m8 \7 u
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/ ~4 Q/ K0 w" X% O" b8 p墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
\. I! ~2 ^% P+ ~+ m" }( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 7 f$ K3 P6 r* C$ m$ S5 W
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.5 `- S7 T- C2 X1 }' u' ~
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 % m' {4 [0 r4 \4 x/ }& b' e) C7 s
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) + X- f" F( L8 A' G6 e
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
q: o* L- ~( A- o; CWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
. d3 P# e8 S& F2 ~2 l, F死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
" Z) j, N9 B1 ^Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
% F, u1 \3 Q4 d8 t5 D后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 + _2 H7 k; d$ ?' c* _
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) & R0 e) \1 m4 ?$ P+ G1 Y# Y
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' y( Q3 W; i0 K; a1 f* I0 x警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 f2 F2 Z x' b: t, a! A
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
; b; M9 x4 i/ L$ K0 d; `话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
# q% I2 E; m w7 s$ H2 G5 ZHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 1 m2 g/ |4 V0 u* K% E: k5 F
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) m5 W! N5 W+ ?/ \9 r( e
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
' A. M! y7 F" TMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?& d- U6 F) c% \6 f7 N3 X: u
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) # _9 G# R* Z5 J x8 O" Z# K
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) " \- S5 B& k4 H# g) m% U$ C% Q1 j9 x
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
" a5 N" O, u( X# dHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
! R& i1 x# k! c2 m9 ^Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) * l s" u; E) i( R1 \! k) `
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
1 U" a, @5 g/ ?3 E4 C: _( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) + b# I7 D" u+ @3 O: o' r
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( b$ m# i# q8 V总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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