 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ; }# b+ A# a6 X Y& r( a
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 4 f( J- }+ z: P( `
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) ) k8 K6 a) ]# z6 a# q& e" b7 i
Holmes: I just picked it up." l/ i2 [+ i0 i
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) ; \% w( A9 Q5 K( x b
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.$ d1 L7 ?1 U: P# A
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
! s% S$ k N+ Y7 n# JHolmes: You did./ p" s' m, q5 B7 e% p. k
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 2 X# m6 k' K$ n `" c
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 5 P5 I: J0 b6 |& o. {" d u
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.. l0 c, O0 p% ?0 ]+ R
Holmes: Granted.3 C( g. m; j: m5 C
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ~8 ^* k0 Z4 _
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 8 I' L& q3 c& z- [# M
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: ^; }9 ]4 u2 S$ z9 v+ o% y4 ?; M拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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9 R% a# L/ A6 m9 ]2 S; j+ [Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
; l) V7 z3 `3 D# b$ p1 LWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 7 n" ^8 R* }( M$ V3 s1 C
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 5 o, E: L/ ~1 p/ S" B* v; [
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% J: J/ C# \$ Z0 x0 e1 [8 i# vBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 - k. X8 ~3 Y; U! V
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1 q" [: S) K: zIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
& ~& t2 }# V6 o# f4 _( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ! V$ D8 v0 N' ]: o! ~ R& M
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?& Z. t% B8 H4 b, a/ w: X
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 8 C) Q6 j9 a5 V" p: b' p6 D
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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6 a0 a, W1 g+ l: I Y9 I* kIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
* ~$ r7 r; O. I$ hHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
2 X" z2 j7 c* J* t u# K0 ?+ ^Watson: Get that out of my face.
, Q3 Q, ]8 L; T8 y5 g# E4 fHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
+ M' d% O, `7 fWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
& |3 u, T* }1 T! h" \路人警官 Clarky上场。 ) [1 L+ D+ d/ ~- O3 A' X
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.! n* d( N- F) A4 }$ l5 \
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) ( @$ i, z. a+ G
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
! E# A. {: n" ^' h7 FWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
5 l$ B1 H6 W( c1 u. lHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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7 m8 [ d0 h2 t2 _6 e5 i墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 , W& v! ?8 ?) M/ ?' f
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) " ?, h i6 C3 y% P0 @7 {, g* N
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
5 c' W" y+ e7 i- l& R- pWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 4 x( P/ a9 X# _0 n9 w3 k% [+ X6 H
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
9 w8 i) I0 S; j& ?Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
" X# y+ o" ^' i( d1 ]4 j- HBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
/ ^' W4 K/ ?; PWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) ! `2 A8 i& ~" t
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 6 q! t7 t$ Z6 ~! D, h# p/ X: Z' Q
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) " E+ T$ ?. k: D; s6 y
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
$ b' f8 a/ \, O$ I' `Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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) [: @. S4 a5 A4 o警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 ! | _: R: |/ U* p# e* S1 E, ^
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.* \3 V# t( I- t$ J( }
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+ c Z2 T2 L7 |3 l9 T, P* A接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 6 ?* s! _9 i; ^, e3 D( T
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 / ]2 l9 H' f# x- g/ G# c9 l7 o
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) % ]) c6 J( S l
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) ) Z4 P+ F0 A5 ?5 Z" p4 k
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
$ y. }" g1 [4 DMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?! Y t ^' S) d4 x/ f! ?
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
- j; z% F/ Q; }Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 7 J, U/ P1 g+ q; T
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
( @( c7 h! Z/ Q2 a8 n+ cHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) % _! i$ u4 v8 @, i0 Z
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
+ _/ _1 _/ [2 I% vMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
& N- U) P# a. K* F4 q6 W/ l0 O( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) $ z2 H# d) J5 `* a+ a
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v& G# @4 {, z$ g* w4 ^' R总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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