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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay( f1 _) d, d# Y) K) G
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) Y/ N1 x0 S2 G+ O/ \影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。
# l8 E; w; Q% M) Z0 b! E+ R9 jWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)  F5 ~$ h8 v) e/ f/ C
Holmes: I just picked it up.
0 o8 H: _& `! ]1 v6 {Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)( z4 G9 p* a1 J* \& l- L
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.9 \- M! o  U, y9 v8 f
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
. l4 R. L1 q' j. b  n" i5 zHolmes: You did.
) N3 ^6 n6 A* r  j(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)9 ]+ W+ Y$ _6 }; z" B
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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# u/ f" ^9 k, Y3 V- D/ `# W5 E9 e  Z宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。
, j$ ?: ~: g$ DWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
! q& e: k% b8 v2 P, _Holmes: Granted.. {0 S: V% V! \5 W% i  {! `; E& f
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。# A/ B2 d+ ~+ A' v( ^8 v, V
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。$ ]6 H# L( P$ o( `; o
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, d, e" E. O5 _/ j% n9 t; ~WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
$ G* C; w' R; q7 @3 f! |: p% uWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)& ~  U' b' W7 N/ N! ?9 \7 [
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: d& B! _& ?7 _9 I$ Y$ UHolmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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  k1 Y5 Q# {4 k, w7 b3 M+ e" mBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。9 b! B, }: e6 U" C  Z
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, w7 x1 L, [# G; r( m0 jIrene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
2 B/ [5 j$ n; jIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)
: e! B) W, w1 [) T, P' U+ [Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?% K0 T+ {, r  F9 o* d" [
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)( O; d% R8 r4 U' J% m* Z" k
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.+ e7 u* Z6 E/ O9 E
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8 N6 r) n. X% \5 K9 l6 j; ^$ ZIrene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。& M% t2 b: A) Q' ?+ z4 V4 G' O! }
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
2 h( ~3 G. b/ }% u) D) ]Watson: Get that out of my face.) U9 I: H0 |3 e- m5 u
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.' y  P0 E& t  o% K( d& h# j3 `* j
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
# F$ @$ t+ D( p) b+ f& E+ g& n, B9 K路人警官Clarky上场。
+ z+ ?* @! U* {3 v! }3 X: qClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
+ @& i1 Y' c7 cHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)/ r. z; j: t5 ]- g; N: C
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。2 N& O  P( T0 m* i* a0 y: e
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
' _2 P$ t% x0 u  E* k( J8 cHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.8 g+ x$ T! h+ |4 [. f
10.
# v, F6 p, {& M6 d  Y墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。+ \0 ^$ s) \2 }
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)( Z  ?2 u' B' R' A7 P
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
& t; `) i6 s4 Y7 m) I  W% KWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。& u, {" b; `3 V) S: T
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)- Y7 o. r! L7 s2 X7 I" N
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…. x* P! T, G1 p; x& c% g$ q) b
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)3 Q. s5 c/ R& x7 [
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
7 Z5 }( h% @1 X2 x5 D3 EHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)) C8 w! d+ Q% ?: ]
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。+ V! s) v; _1 y& m$ k- m) |' R* N
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)9 Z8 K, A3 X! f, K5 U) M* s1 [
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0 }2 Z4 ~- V+ N4 j警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。9 H* E% u5 {5 Z4 H' d) u0 u
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
. I; p7 f- V5 U9 X# E话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
+ L9 p* B& c+ X4 n5 kHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
' C- `7 b& j! V8 ~! k) z; pWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
2 R( p, ?) g) J6 S( W/ nHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)# x6 ?' v& G( ~: Z! G. a8 Q
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
' c( v3 y5 V( VWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
: x( m8 J' L0 H+ ]+ Q% L+ tHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)8 s5 w& o" T6 [: i
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
  \5 [, B( z* r# o- w- V# J( fHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)2 Y9 }! R: y1 b. Z2 x
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)8 d! |# A% d4 r7 ?
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
7 ?* d& u) g* PWatsonHolmes放了下来。)
& `7 l4 P# B+ y; K% r/ b% o  D4 U***********
" m5 m; s! j3 \  B9 y- g总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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