 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 " D* G3 s/ o! ?5 _6 }. J
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
5 |1 H& F5 l7 M N) O4 f: x. w- aWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
( s! [1 m* c) U- r nHolmes: I just picked it up.( Y7 @8 `) ^3 I( d' J6 m1 b6 j
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) . N9 D+ D% u% C
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.& u4 p* B% `+ S5 \
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
0 x2 g6 _5 N+ i3 G) wHolmes: You did.
6 v* h1 J7 p3 ^$ n" U& U(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
- Q9 W0 _( r5 ?Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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2 S9 F: `1 c& E3 b; ]8 {宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
; S5 a6 D* v5 v" [% SWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
/ x: d0 h& n; n0 n( IHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 5 u: c7 E6 J& [. t
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) ' |9 e$ u( d) v; G* U
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 $ r) `* X( A$ Z; R3 b5 I
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
0 n. P! q/ A* a1 k- nWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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: e5 X+ j8 ?( E/ Y( O. h) q4 sBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 % b" x) j: [8 k- o. w- ^
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" A& Y+ K( h6 w; r4 _Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 & p5 F% ?( l( M! o$ d2 e
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ! Q1 ^& M* ^& K/ v
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?0 n' k( s6 |; F" V6 E
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
5 L. G) |4 ~9 G1 Y( j* d) D2 m, G; A; DIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 7 `* ]" v, r4 n: c6 x
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
* H4 [' g1 f, o! eWatson: Get that out of my face.) l* e4 h; c1 p) H* Y! i* u
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand." [! D1 A" W# F" S# i4 l1 t
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
( F! P! I0 D% W+ A; S& {路人警官 Clarky上场。
~4 Q5 K( y `6 OClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.+ I$ } J; T- _4 c4 a6 a
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
, j" Z+ \3 R' ~8 k: W5 q3 E( v得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ( i. m. j6 O9 s. \4 Y3 `1 [8 U
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
" r$ ]: V* I& F0 xHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.9 a- V t: `: U5 r( x! V- w7 j0 F
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
a( ^6 @. c2 }; C/ K( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) - ? ]: N0 u$ p# ]& S$ R
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.; v, U& P; Z7 z! O/ ^. c" ~0 _$ M# ~$ E
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) / l& Y1 ]/ F# {6 K7 A0 B% M9 m9 [
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# H r) r- m8 F河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
( w/ B( Q! J# x! w. aHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
& s1 P% h) H3 x& i: A! K/ x1 dBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…8 m; W* T7 u" l1 m" K
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) & {3 ?, @1 O9 \7 o
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 $ @2 e. ?$ b! `5 g P/ P0 P
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
: v7 y/ K5 z! J% E1 d( u: c+ J后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
2 [1 g5 ~* T. O( XHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 z: v+ e# ^+ z* l! c" H8 @
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.8 O4 }1 g( c2 n: u
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4 w/ S) i' |" F( a) Q7 {6 w接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
! ]" S. W- r' e$ t5 d话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
( E( C( {4 s6 W8 @& }Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
: e9 ~, }9 \, eWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 9 p6 A4 D1 q# P5 x, k8 c
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
3 _* |. g# K5 [; _Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?1 ?, k, f% _. \; V: q" e% {& O% ?
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
0 a/ w8 {; N P1 x! UHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
U" `) B9 u$ j R6 _; ^9 jWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
8 T8 J9 v3 s3 B' m# rHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
" T. w6 l7 q( C' J8 s1 n& PWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
I' U5 O6 M4 i7 a, `Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 9 e/ C5 v0 F) z2 X) a
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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5 J6 j: L; W! [, j, T' I总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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