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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay+ g# |' [) p4 O7 X3 _9 [
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5 E+ [3 L  S* E影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。- V! j  X, Q+ I9 U
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)+ I3 W+ |1 V5 A7 v/ h: |' n
Holmes: I just picked it up.$ F, r; @9 u  a, q4 T: x
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
! B$ ]# O- r. nHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
2 \) p( x9 ~' n9 Q7 t4 sWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)0 F: K) p% y: p' U1 G
Holmes: You did.
' v! ^8 @! T3 @( E$ I4 ~! d+ @(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)4 z6 G& _; W8 D* K. e8 E  N6 H
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。
  p2 h4 ?* C* x" d" |Watson: Permission to enter the armory.& N6 e0 j. T' g6 U) p! A
Holmes: Granted.
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1 V" n$ H1 k/ z7 T- k! P5 i晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。2 L& W; i6 g* j9 F9 D5 b
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)% Q8 z5 g6 `/ @1 j) X
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" H) P! g  N& X/ r/ C3 Y" P; u7 L拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。  c8 `3 m1 b. n0 h9 b5 a$ {# r
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WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
$ T6 i+ @& {9 a/ ?8 tWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)7 N5 p& V2 l8 E1 F7 h$ P
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Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。! g) `6 t6 _* T
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3 u+ y) E) P7 x$ Q5 I5 z5 nBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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8 P; K( ~) p1 b0 J1 s  c9 wIrene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
$ W2 O* L8 ^) d9 E& TIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)6 j4 n; ^* e7 u& h1 B1 m1 i. G! \; u2 X
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
7 B& _$ W3 x; ~' r, JHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)3 X8 b5 e3 i# t) o  A) U
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。
. _2 G; A3 q  W3 L% K2 _Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
( Z. f/ \; f4 P- YWatson: Get that out of my face.
- ^4 [) p/ z8 c7 L3 y. hHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
9 V" M" u6 I/ P  ^8 r  jWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
8 G2 N- S4 r3 ?, v+ m5 l  h% m+ W路人警官Clarky上场。
0 J4 ^& ~. r: P9 MClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.- A$ D( a% S: V: x& ?
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
# @  w, G$ Q. g% z5 d& \得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。: N$ X( }  W& Y9 A
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
1 h5 R7 ?% j/ n0 g: b7 r8 tHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.2 J0 p9 q) U8 o# T& Q
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8 X; v  y" u+ W# l9 m( F墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。, z( m0 U4 u, E9 R* M9 O
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)
( X  {' ~% {. ?% dHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
: Q" Q: j  s$ h& H- F% l, I! BWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)3 m/ O, d2 c+ H! ^, v6 ]; N9 D
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。) d" Z  q" `7 ~/ S
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
# J* V7 S+ T2 A! w* E+ ?Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…* l' j  {* c9 {' Q( ]
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
4 {, @; u% C" E( p; V死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
2 h$ C5 T1 a2 ?+ V4 c, PHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
6 m( M9 c9 j# k8 J- S1 O: p后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
5 m) o7 o0 M0 T  lHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
/ M7 }2 R2 ~% b8 s: rLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
6 f. t: O% y' J: O2 K( S- n, G+ e话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
& I2 J  i  t- d: G  c9 S2 A+ FHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
+ Y2 G3 m; J/ Q9 p# I5 J5 @+ l/ kWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
5 e- Q& I& }* c3 ?: N! OHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)
: ]$ ~! t; B# E$ D& Z. O9 Q/ _Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?4 I- B8 m$ @/ ?# L
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)& i+ O+ k/ H, I. ?- j' b. \
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
  V5 I  F) d5 A9 k9 g- yWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)2 s8 l# @& _3 m* ?# G
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)8 N1 a) e6 ?; D& V2 |
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
. J/ b& H. K  {; X. i; WMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)- D7 t* L. R+ O
WatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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, F  \3 a, ^+ k( y总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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