 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 2 {, x3 M9 _. F
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 4 S' S0 K6 g- v6 I0 O
Holmes: I just picked it up.5 T4 }" i4 Z/ Y& V( p- {0 i6 M
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
" O/ t3 @& s4 p& k5 b- vHolmes: Knew I forgot something.$ M$ ]/ k6 t2 N3 l( u
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) N+ Y( c3 e4 g b
Holmes: You did.; f8 F3 r- g8 K" |9 ?
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
5 Q8 T% j7 U! v# J: p5 ~Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all." }: }" P: y! ~) d1 m
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) L# V P# s2 I) M3 P% N) q宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 $ v S9 _ u9 f' ?0 x$ g
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
, X( }7 T+ W' j; LHolmes: Granted.
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! H' s- T; y6 F; T晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
9 B9 A* W& ]1 \6 h N A$ H. s' iWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 4 n) [- x1 w. A! N' z) X
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 : I% w8 |* e# F- [ O
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
9 A1 I; Y1 U; [: r# H0 e& ^, X$ D) v' UWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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& Z: R) z0 m7 H, s3 z5 {8 n fIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
a/ |% r4 a+ C( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 0 j+ P+ A8 R6 B& r; j0 I# u) U
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?: ^+ c! H! D& o, c' o' S
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
7 Q" v- f: Z: [" }7 QIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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5 u% A8 S* Y- i1 E P1 CIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ) }' E+ ?1 u) ~0 Z
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) p! h$ P% L) {/ `4 b
Watson: Get that out of my face.
7 y( u; O/ K; d; t! T |- V' SHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.1 s* ?2 S: U! W# z) {8 V
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
4 f5 }1 M$ ~1 C% ~! d& y路人警官 Clarky上场。 ) k# e g: |; b% Y2 W/ o
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.& q S$ s ~. l8 Y8 J
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) ' G* n' O& N U' v% p4 p' G% {! q
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
4 q. G% c2 N- F; hWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
( a' o" d t+ c* dHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
6 L! j6 W% c5 e* y( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
8 W/ B, t9 Q2 z4 }& EHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
" |! y" m% k4 nWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) " j; J' X9 a0 q. `& L9 L
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) q& R2 o1 I, [+ X; h1 n! L" R河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
6 `$ H6 w1 c/ dHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
+ P# O) Y5 ]6 o* f) _4 g8 HBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
9 E! u6 g; v7 ZWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
) ~( h6 A5 S T, o+ B/ _7 X; t$ I. o死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 8 P: o6 i) T6 K; @- m, I$ u1 V
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 9 J6 Q/ D" \4 w( Z. y) H8 q
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 & u \2 a$ g2 o T7 U
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) $ j' {1 Q) F3 g6 u- g( H
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
% G/ e9 c4 _. j; i( p0 T! \Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 # |8 d& I/ E' H: R2 U
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
$ A9 K+ Y7 v) H/ f$ F1 ~5 AHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 6 @* z- h: O) J4 H8 t
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
+ P V3 ^: n4 u& [Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
0 i+ K ^* v* S0 g7 s/ \Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?. q6 Z+ T* r) w( ~1 z
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
7 \6 E; L) a5 q( NHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
& E" f5 n7 n- s! q' e$ r4 `Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) " ~6 v, g W$ e" ^3 V* F& j
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 3 _7 f p8 p: z' x- V
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
& Y$ P' M) r) K1 MMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 6 Q- y5 E, h/ S% |- Y
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 1 k+ g0 K X+ W' x6 f
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7 ?- P( v0 J6 b总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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