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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。6 d( d5 }' {" t( d# |
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
4 n" k8 h4 ]  ~$ q/ i0 gHolmes: I just picked it up.
0 ]' p9 U' I# I" L. R, MWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)6 P8 E$ b- ?5 U- w9 K- s9 q
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.$ w: J0 u- i4 x9 p
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
8 g0 j/ @; j( [* i7 KHolmes: You did.- t- A/ Q" F8 `
(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)3 c" b: u9 E4 T9 s0 O
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。% v9 w+ |: R& R, P- D
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.8 P: [& E/ G7 S+ A  v, m: @/ b
Holmes: Granted.
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8 c- t+ g8 \" H1 V' b$ _晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
0 K6 j. y: I* h  nWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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* K- I2 S6 T; `% ~拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。+ H- |& t) q. t2 _0 d- J
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WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。( X8 `5 s2 K5 H* x3 `6 a3 d. y
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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) |" z2 Y% ~0 d- _4 a# z5 O  Z' y  nHolmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。% u6 R! u* Q) C
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
: H0 c: _3 W! |( h7 n+ kIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)3 r" v2 W6 a( }8 b, S" K
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
4 i# Y2 e% }) _; pHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。): Q7 i9 s( V; @6 R/ b1 v9 a
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope., f1 }2 Y! w2 S( w2 W5 J/ E
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。
2 A- j1 C& P& CHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)4 t# z' K8 T1 a! [8 a; V' F
Watson: Get that out of my face.
+ O8 f. a) ?2 }& G' Y0 Z& _0 kHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
4 t" j& b+ @, J6 p3 i: y# sWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
9 e& M' y/ `6 z( D. K- l( Q1 v& T路人警官Clarky上场。* H  \* R5 W" c
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
- Q: e' a+ G' G7 I& T* r' vHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
) x/ o# w9 _  w  i; b4 \& L& H得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
# Y. @( N& o' N) S1 p; xWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
5 D- ?9 s  n6 N4 LHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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5 q' R6 p) c0 F% H2 {6 T8 O1 \7 i墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。- d: B- i: j- Y8 H
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)7 k" j" f( {( g& i. e+ X
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely., v  I1 F* n0 T' c. Q- Z6 e6 }
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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4 B! X9 e; j, V# S- d- J- e' ]6 A河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。
: K4 f; C5 ^8 @Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
3 A+ N. r1 g# [, ABlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…; t# r; d+ M% \7 }
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)+ D% f+ O- `; ]+ ]4 [
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene" X  i9 O5 H. S4 M
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)" b7 |+ I. i2 e( X. ?# F' e, F! `! m
后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
2 A+ H; S; l: T$ V3 UHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)6 z; h% M9 U8 b% Y" C% w
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+ j: J% }8 D  Q3 G警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
0 A$ b4 |# Z% S( }+ eLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
0 ~1 f$ E; v# I% F. e3 O! L3 X# b话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
9 z% |0 b" K6 Y: E/ ZHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)3 e3 F; X7 D( ]1 t3 S8 P9 Z4 K
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
, P" }6 ^" w; y- VHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)' j& b( }4 L5 M" ]0 r& ?, N2 l0 T
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?1 P0 r+ ^1 N9 T, M
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
5 X# s, o8 o% PHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
$ L5 Q# x* W# Y0 }9 v9 pWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)5 c8 J: M" K" @% o% |
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
! Y+ U* c# J# `2 q0 fWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
9 N; F  V0 s7 r7 GMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
+ t& F! A" u7 H: @, DWatsonHolmes放了下来。), ?; ]0 s5 b$ [' c0 v) o5 H$ ^$ m
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6 N% X; R) r: {0 u' c, w总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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