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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay
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+ O$ H1 a1 m) Z影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。
0 _5 Y: d1 I  m, ?# M, N4 tWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
9 f2 G# W) q9 e8 B7 s, LHolmes: I just picked it up.- S% C" j$ v  i- W4 @* `4 v$ x
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
1 E* W1 X  d8 Y& cHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
+ {$ p, u4 Y0 K* yWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)8 ^/ n  }" |# e7 G+ |' k* q
Holmes: You did.* t& F0 A- c. ?
(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)9 d% n, p9 V4 G7 l' J
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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5 _1 n/ u. ^6 R宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。4 f" y% s! a& O2 g
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.- w  E' G" I- u$ F- ~1 U, t" `& ^
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
, q8 T* n9 i$ YWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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6 Z: @! x3 N  G, D- O' W8 C# H! `拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。6 M$ ?( d; E2 U5 X$ h" m' o
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9 T- V. ?$ k* k5 BWatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。. x( w4 _8 D" @' E1 S
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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* S. p9 ]" ]5 @9 ^Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。* f5 X5 N, D( _9 _  Q3 f
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
% T/ H9 W/ A0 FIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)5 ]; c5 `" H* b8 r+ c7 t
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
/ A- W% q$ n1 J- I# \Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)
4 X9 \+ c3 o; q3 n0 I4 k7 ZIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.5 D: s. q2 s4 n, e3 Q  V0 a3 h1 ~
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- g4 t" O: \- q) F+ r, zIrene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。
7 G6 x( R9 O5 M/ n9 @Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
* U; c, f% @- [0 B) ?Watson: Get that out of my face.
0 V( Y! V/ G& GHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
- J0 I  H) _  r- }& o0 V7 o3 F$ wWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
2 K- a1 x& a. m9 N( e路人警官Clarky上场。& N+ Y3 l* u- [, l2 u
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
, j" S! e4 I& V2 M# BHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)( M/ x; V7 _# P. |, t! ?
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
) W, I+ A' j- W7 b; `4 Z$ l4 SWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
3 S* h& ], W1 {% ~( d$ ~6 c* [Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.) J" ]' B6 q6 \0 G- f
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墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。5 I, k( T* l" R: i
Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)
/ A2 e  d* U' ^, i# R- c+ ZHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
+ d. |6 H9 z5 v1 m* k' K' Z# e( K; H' gWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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( W/ j% ~2 S7 _0 {河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。
, l: ~- d8 k7 g) s# oHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
6 V' B  u& V1 f5 N. M) cBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
: X" |! V5 L& D$ U; U' s5 E$ CWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。). N( c6 X8 Y! B9 {5 Z
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene+ C! C( E; }" a, d5 n
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
0 c$ J; u1 s7 ]$ Q- f. f( v后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。, o* ?- T# g# s- B* w$ }! {
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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2 q7 {. i& b  g% A" D( K9 N警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。% n0 p7 P, j& I
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.( a) r+ {3 d0 P. T9 u$ Z" }
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。8 d! y1 O  y1 b0 E9 {
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。# p  g) R* H8 h* ^' X
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
3 {5 D- q3 K3 h5 O' e: hWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)* h. v, r& K# Q. D# N% Y0 z. h( ?9 [
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)
! C1 l% }2 I4 B( _Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?3 O! h  ]7 d  p/ {/ f
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)" R, J) @( g* H5 \3 {+ v8 U$ n; a
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)( |  G9 v8 F) |4 a" M
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)* S3 E8 x) J" D) G; ^9 I  Z
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
8 U: J) O; S: [7 X- Y3 X6 j7 c/ b& nWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)( B, ]4 s6 w  D2 n+ d1 g6 r
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)# Q' O2 |; W) A4 h# H' K
WatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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( d2 m" a1 _" X6 }8 B  }, i, V9 Y总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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