 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
, V' U5 `) D1 L( n) uWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) , H4 v& }# n/ |1 L' ?
Holmes: I just picked it up.: ^9 G3 v: l0 I2 n+ x0 Y) {/ ?+ m
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
* I' s7 K2 r, n E5 \" @3 I/ d! aHolmes: Knew I forgot something./ b% X1 A) y: U1 J8 W
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
' d4 x* v9 ?6 X, N7 u, ^/ G2 DHolmes: You did.+ }/ Y) R) u% P" x# I: ~) d
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) / H' n9 P( B1 |$ D' a* s, i
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.9 M: b2 |2 x1 g8 U# n$ T* L
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
$ |/ d' ^6 t: I3 xWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
9 s W" I2 I0 ?; B2 Q- E9 kHolmes: Granted.
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1 ^1 e+ E# o% T晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 6 a4 l8 \: \; M
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 $ G5 M" ^6 ~' Y& ^ n V. ?
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, s7 L: K' v; ]2 rWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
/ q7 F7 [5 L R4 O) sWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 7 k* q. I' j+ x7 Q$ L2 _. q
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' o: {5 p2 F- w6 x3 w2 dHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 6 ]9 F/ [* ? C) @1 ?+ T' l
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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; s( S3 l8 _$ ?& {; j( c9 hIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
# \/ w0 P" s$ z0 l4 H" i7 P: m& o( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
; j% q( ?% K @' YIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?( ~$ ` Y0 ?4 K# T7 V! F: V
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ; \! }) j6 S! z x; g
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
5 i7 F0 y; t$ q5 [( L. g' u. }" zHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) . a( R' Q/ ]( x4 D$ ^8 u1 B6 ^( w
Watson: Get that out of my face.
/ c! Y D' T O/ @. Y+ ]Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
. y9 ~% u) G; E* W6 I- _Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.9 o" E* }8 \' J
路人警官 Clarky上场。
* ]4 L; ^8 t$ @; q6 X, ~1 }: HClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.9 X8 q! i- {/ u8 r; `/ B% ?: R; M
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
2 X! v0 c* X) R$ D- B7 B( u3 P5 R. b得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
& g/ q/ r" I7 C1 O% PWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
9 M( X# s' }8 q7 }0 \( CHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 4 V2 p, A8 T4 C9 Y2 \
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
( x% L2 A {1 {% {" B% bHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
8 \2 z1 K( ^1 I8 OWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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0 Z' t3 z) }. z4 _河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 3 r% {; F& _$ Q6 Z q$ J: K* J
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 2 Y+ \: m3 E4 B/ h5 v) ]& X# _
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…5 B' U* N/ W- k, \
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 0 I/ g& N& m& Q) r V
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 " Y! l6 G( q h6 s
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
! P2 ~: R$ T H3 D5 `6 I2 z% L* w/ j后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
! H7 k2 L. W6 }: M! RHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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$ c; s4 q* i" p4 h& `4 z警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 3 {3 I8 Y8 C2 g$ u) [# R
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.2 S& L4 c7 U$ U
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: ^3 V, m5 Y0 N" @. E3 W接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
5 S6 f1 J4 f" e7 k; g$ A; L话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
$ x# V8 `2 @* ^" s! ?Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
( i' ]) S4 D" ]7 w Y' AWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 1 D3 g. ~: U+ I; c F8 H# D" b, T G
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
$ ?4 ^, Q: w0 T! iMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
, v/ j V8 f* O; Y5 YWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 5 J6 m# s: C m9 v8 k3 p
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
+ S$ I. r3 J. b6 a. pWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 9 q% l( W( b2 C0 K# w) r- K% [. t4 Y: ]
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
9 Y0 w( k @% J) ^8 eWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 5 V" D1 I" F r5 v6 _9 D$ a: j
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) d" V# [2 K D/ D* C1 [+ M1 p5 K
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 5 t Z$ Z3 W; [ X' w
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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