 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
$ q3 R! p2 x( t0 @, _ tWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
. }6 ~9 }7 Q8 rHolmes: I just picked it up." P: S3 ?% J% L5 }2 l7 ]; m# h
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) . Y o8 V# S$ h! y( o
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.' ]' h. E6 m" @" v8 k* z
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
7 j" j6 g" h6 ~8 q' mHolmes: You did.! k, L" k8 u& N% h
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) * U0 q6 W3 Q5 b7 N( x. Y. y
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.! ~; M0 H+ E8 Z4 L
2.
4 C( t9 H4 }# ~0 J宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
/ H3 w( n6 w; x5 T& k- {# a: ]Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
& U% E: w- @9 F% w3 THolmes: Granted.8 s5 Y" E& V1 y2 D/ i8 B
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 - Q7 X: V. {! g* G- k9 @6 M
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 2 p6 \% `. Q7 [9 _* h
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, z4 k; I* Y! q' L& G* E2 J拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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4 H+ ]) t& j$ t5 w% }0 B0 P ]9 ~Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 ( \& i! ^8 |3 T' _) `( N8 l
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) , T. J, @# H+ \% [. m& W* E
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3 F' t/ n9 P& F ]/ b2 \- HHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
6 s% n4 ]5 a2 U# }8 @$ Y& k$ j* `( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ' M( h, k0 }" ]0 a0 @
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
8 B6 z5 G5 ?& l% p6 Q* _+ _% UHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 9 @" R( ?( q9 R3 V$ Q( h( h5 L
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ( j* ~$ { |/ R. D
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) , { R3 G- `/ C4 b! J( _2 W
Watson: Get that out of my face.+ J: K# i& F* E
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.# {& [* Y+ b" O% e
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.7 q4 z" n: a6 B' N! \6 v1 i9 b
路人警官 Clarky上场。 7 ^: b& K; s1 V
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
7 s- G2 G# g7 c, ]Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) + R4 m1 V; t8 l4 ^, w2 Y& t
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ! N7 I( v+ O" ^8 t
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
$ y6 w' r0 A; h L- i2 I# nHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 " k8 t2 m. s2 `: K* \7 h; y
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
, k8 q, ^! w: A' K; A2 t* ~$ H* S" NHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.' X( m7 L9 C. z4 [# ]+ _
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) - ?, ~# }8 n, q
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' b5 V* _7 O8 r- u河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
- Q" I N" ?6 pHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
/ Q( U% R% z- X/ Y! xBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…; A" |8 J l/ F; i$ d6 ^3 t2 h3 w
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) : q& b, ?- V" W! m8 m4 H5 N' ~
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
: b$ x6 M8 K: o4 f4 A5 c, k" r1 L. q% [Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) ) `# R+ A5 ]) E7 ^! A3 k- f1 ?
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
* o$ o2 r% o, c+ l2 ~Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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: V" L9 R/ F% W1 `( J6 \# {警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 D# Y* \1 l. v" f0 A
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.% F- Z8 o5 n X4 }( w
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% m- N# q/ Y7 h% h. x! _3 L7 j接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 " I; V1 A6 i4 D
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 8 F W `0 ^& T! }3 T
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
4 k: a( C# v5 f* mWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 1 {/ r9 ]; k$ Q/ V& S
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
! @" l" t3 m1 S9 P7 A% `Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
P. }9 b/ }: F( GWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
$ j8 V" p6 P' ~+ \6 s1 dHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
6 N# g6 A8 |$ t5 IWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) S5 W# ^! M' R) o+ L
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
+ L# i# r7 }, L5 o0 _: AWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 4 a& b. s3 k+ `: h$ l; N, g6 p
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) 4 c! O% I, @. x8 T ^ D6 @
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) / U0 ]) U* T, o
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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