 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 6 c% E# R; S$ B( e6 T" h5 c/ p0 M/ e
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8 D6 t8 z: w3 T& _1 r影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
7 V: n$ `& e8 C/ u; r/ ^% YWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
: g7 ]0 w$ d2 s; f6 n5 j1 B: p' G& KHolmes: I just picked it up.3 a8 ]# J5 M% ?4 m1 M
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) ' {. e* M- l" v! c! g
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.9 ?( `& Q* v/ @# s2 }
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
7 Q/ D; t- I9 P! }- OHolmes: You did.
, C/ I) B! k! O5 _# c, S& E; ~* z(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
# c& t* A4 w3 Z1 |0 @) ^( o# d ]' jHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.( n. p; h: A: w6 Y) y0 S
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 + d. D3 e3 e, b) @; W
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.+ M; x+ |: `+ v8 |
Holmes: Granted.: ]: |: r: T2 b$ X9 p3 l
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
/ ?" o5 C7 R( x3 i; mWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 3 d' s: g5 \# |
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ! D! Y- k/ `3 d! g( f- o
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
4 Z9 r+ z/ K3 J0 YWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 3 J4 V, u, e9 q) H8 A" m
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; d8 M+ U6 b c+ M& I8 ]! _# gHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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6 o% b8 K3 o' |. HIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
5 }" Q& b2 m- _0 D& o7 S! |( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ! w% L3 @7 Y; z- D: t
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?( O+ n8 [/ N6 X1 ?" X
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
# R+ ~% E8 |6 \1 o, zIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.3 y* Z( ^! k4 F5 ~) X! I% [1 D" w: ~
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ! v3 @2 x* g& R) B8 Y! F5 b
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) $ z8 h% l U7 E7 z+ @- O& Z) v
Watson: Get that out of my face.
# D1 a" c3 N! \$ l# z1 C: B# uHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand./ c, ~, d$ k0 y* W: ^
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
' h2 R, D7 p9 A/ L5 K5 @0 n6 P" k: O路人警官 Clarky上场。
+ I: ]; G) ]1 s. OClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
* y/ v( ]4 F2 BHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
! k7 m0 e2 j& B5 r* E3 {得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 5 I: |3 G+ h1 R
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
# s* ~9 C8 ` m9 LHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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( ~% j# v. X) g; @2 s& V2 e2 k墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
7 R3 V7 r. l3 ?5 ~( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) E' K. t$ p# h+ J$ E+ s
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.5 v Z. k5 O" p! d* y
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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' V9 Y; i9 _9 }9 K: E0 O, \河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 ; w, ?. K- U% H8 F3 j
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
' p8 N/ k& r i% `- L, ], UBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…: c# C% Z/ Q4 v, y- Q' R/ T. b
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) * |! c- S/ q, k$ M* @& I" i
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
) T( B8 D( B7 g# { UHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) # F0 l8 k# @5 |1 S
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 % u% B' |7 x$ u3 S
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
" i, A. c$ @" p1 ]8 j3 r4 wLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.8 Q0 r+ H/ ]3 d8 {6 m) {; v, P
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* |7 |7 P8 X0 V5 b5 L接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 2 d( |7 P' t( j5 D4 R
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
* s# \: ^" [0 w$ lHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
9 P8 e4 p3 R* xWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) - ^' d8 t& s# o h" ~6 I
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) ~: v8 i" P- W) w
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?3 h4 {4 _- _; K. w4 |4 g3 ]
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) l6 X+ q* i7 z
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) " ?! s# i8 b' C# `; b& f; w
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 2 H( T, q' M: B& t/ X
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
o# g# N; n2 \' [2 f! y$ TWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) + Y* I/ o+ s9 x4 @& u
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
0 x9 B$ N! n3 A0 F1 N$ y( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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