 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ! _& v' ?8 \0 `
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
( d! c; z7 ~% M M) @$ eWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 9 |8 U" ~' y, c
Holmes: I just picked it up.
8 u q: f" M: [" d# [! h7 D4 n' R) @Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
: Y* R; I$ L0 {Holmes: Knew I forgot something.0 a0 B) Z$ w* P4 m- {
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
1 m& Q3 T5 ]6 h0 y2 `Holmes: You did.
3 s% g# V U* p% f- v(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
" p% Q) J& I4 p: R2 tHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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" j2 v+ b+ R, l: k# Y7 C. g) p宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 & F8 Z! T( s8 I! X$ v( z d8 F
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.. {4 |; f0 Q- ~" b8 O2 @
Holmes: Granted.* k6 o7 d6 P* c5 B
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
5 q7 q; \; e8 kWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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. M( N/ M+ \0 f) h; p& m5 J- w* x拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 5 q# E- Q+ {$ N' V3 z, Q
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
% R/ n0 z+ q: H% iWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) / Y7 r. \, [0 O7 p
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 ) G( \8 S5 |7 C: {; p; A4 h% q
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
4 H4 x7 C. L! A0 R, Q, V! G. ?0 d( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 0 } m5 S; ^ N3 U# L: y2 n
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?$ h. O: G: S4 U7 q6 y% ?
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
! ?# K' l: {5 a6 LIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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9 b& m# n7 O2 E3 }) a5 BIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
. S1 s$ `$ W3 ZHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
; j$ _' m! j$ W& MWatson: Get that out of my face.
: w6 C6 H; T/ P# WHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.) j& Z. L) j. W4 M9 g- V
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
) m" U& c2 {) |; g& H路人警官 Clarky上场。
3 Q% @3 k* m1 o( M: v* ] z/ AClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.8 C6 Y! u- e r
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
" B4 G* G2 N' Z5 p9 Y得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 " w2 V# X' M0 f& J' b
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?+ y! q2 N, r; [7 Z7 C# U; k
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 ( u! x7 F i3 E( d
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) % T0 D/ @2 {4 l- J+ T6 ~
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
# b& b, B: o& r; r7 TWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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& f+ B& \3 T; m* R, S河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 1 m$ i! r# }- A2 q
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 4 q8 ]7 g9 R/ `! |* g+ j
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…4 h) K5 G4 J7 `$ E
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) / V2 [ c3 `+ y4 l! ?$ O% f
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 M9 D) [) O% K% M$ p% C
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
( y z& s( D; X% H4 [+ u- z后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 ! r, ~+ ~, G3 v8 [' v M$ j
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) : f# Z1 ]9 S/ t( r- Y( i
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$ q% z% o1 O# d ? v0 @警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
% N1 I: j2 S! I* }$ [Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.8 _, }( c' k, |9 k. _6 X9 ]7 `
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 ! q# e( a1 Z. }5 R6 O% s4 S
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 : U$ N+ N+ d8 U$ V ^! o. [
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
) ~' m9 K+ U& A7 a, CWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) $ u! k3 \) B( M3 X' F2 \$ K! G
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
* Q9 M1 r9 E I/ Y& f: v v2 lMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
2 o5 Q, Q7 a' P1 M A5 eWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
' T D! o8 J) @2 B5 Y: N) gHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) . v: G4 Y% _1 K G) L! I
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 3 K, s4 g: }8 i- z# x. o2 D
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) ! N+ p6 c* f$ d1 A
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
+ s2 k: [0 g4 y" i, m. i/ zMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
0 M, E% b7 z, t# w/ B( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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