《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。（比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。）在这个故事里，没头脑是Holmes，不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay。
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* C' s1 r; h7 \6 i2 ?( C! Y$ e# q: T影片开头，Holmes启动Combo发大招，从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的Shrelock和Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。* ]+ ?7 {, Q9 m8 L/ L
Watson: I like the hat. （吐糟开始。）8 U9 ~" ?# D' L& E1 Y, X- c
Holmes: I just picked it up./ x$ q, n" X: c# z# ?
Watson: You remember your revolver? （显然没有。）
% e! C2 \! H' z* L" eHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
8 b4 e8 f) @) W0 U- j! h/ ?Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. （吐糟继续。）
. C8 f- M( b+ ]: JHolmes: You did.- W8 e5 @' Q  {$ B6 H
（注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子，吐糟。）$ r8 f% t: J. T1 ]% {4 C
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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, `2 {+ ?7 w3 ~! L+ S& |0 s3 e宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器（该不会因为Watson的新欢吧），枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。Watson敲Holmes的房门。
2 \. m1 }% [& W3 E3 `Watson: Permission to enter the armory.1 O/ k  F& \( `, P6 g% K
Holmes: Granted.
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. {! Y: [$ c3 J' ?晚餐桌上，吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻（女性）后。$ f4 }1 {  _0 L% |9 p
Watson: Well done, old boy. （潜台词：very mature。）
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拳击场那段（Holmes启动Combo Strike之前）的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”，是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。, `/ @) ?' V2 M
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Watson带Holmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作，发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。6 b) `) Y/ N: \% k  u7 X! j% r
Watson: And what happens if I do this? （掀开瓶子，用手杖敲了敲，把虫子全放跑了。）' K( ], D- f" i7 N8 R  _
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Holmes去见Blackwood时，Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的（好吧，信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的）《约翰默示录》的一章，《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。# c0 H/ W' B4 F; n
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% a3 w' g6 k" ^( mIrene（就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼）带着Moriarty（莫利亚蒂教授，福尔摩斯系列的最终boss）的委托来见Holmes。
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Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?' P+ ?% e# z, D# Y; l. s* E
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? （这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。）, U% Y+ Z' w2 m! [2 j) l
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.# X) b) b7 a5 N# z$ ^4 |
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* l5 Z; m3 U. c4 Z' WIrene离开，Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场，玩儿命吐糟仰慕Irene的Holmes，建议Holmes远离麻烦（leave the case alone）。
, `6 L  d1 J$ A) B' U$ `Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. （醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。）
  K. L% q; s+ ]3 d3 A1 [$ kWatson: Get that out of my face.
: W; ]6 {) G4 W5 l8 oHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.% N' x1 r0 F6 Z" ^7 h- e8 b
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
' e" O  u: l4 g7 S3 f路人警官Clarky上场。+ }# P- L8 D5 v) P
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.0 l: o5 Q, X& W  R5 l3 e
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. （面对伦敦警察，一种智力的优越感油然而生。）
/ K3 Q( V+ R2 N0 ]. x' V得知Blackwood死而复活后，Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
! J  L. w( F8 r$ i; sWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?  O9 f& p3 Q: v- i# }, u' ~
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.: ~+ V% _& m  e3 P
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墓地勘查后，Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场，诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母，Holmes独自调查死者的住处。$ j2 Q: L& V- l) r. B
（Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。）$ q7 K9 v+ a9 e9 J/ g# Q' k
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.; |0 _' i  h( f3 z) \4 X
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. （我们管这叫傲娇。）: {3 a) j( G4 Q, A7 K% z; V
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河边屠宰场，Blackwood装13地出场后。8 a! }3 K7 r" W. W! W
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. （吐糟。）2 A! A# P8 _% L: X" {2 o; E
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
, C/ z: Z+ I8 w4 D* {Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. （再吐。）. Y) R" l$ e4 j
死亡机器开动，火焰包围了Sherck和Irene。( j. J! g; C$ K% X+ t# u9 m& ]4 x/ u6 i
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson （其实快被烤焦了。）
& U+ o, P5 M5 y4 \后来解Watson的皮带（挂在链子上增大阻力）。" H4 {6 a- }5 T
Holmes: Don’t get excited. （汗。）
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes，看到地上推理用的画符（顺便说一句，那作案顺序实在太古典了）。) N; [0 A% |. b8 Z. G
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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  g+ `% K/ R/ a1 w5 X接下来的吐糟点不多了，因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后，才有了新笑点。对了，决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
" d) T& x  ^5 U9 s话说Watson和未婚妻Mary向Holmes道别，发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
5 v4 ~4 {1 m7 m. }& |Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. （吐糟Watson）But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. （暗示Watson放他下来。）Good afternoon, dear. （向Mary问好。）( T' e) A, S! Q
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. （淡定。）: Q8 }' O9 F* ~
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. （再次暗示Watson放他下来。）0 U$ ]* l! J2 z% f1 s; {3 j
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?5 M& u1 v( x' y1 \4 S% @  Q: W7 B1 @
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. （淡定。）: t$ d& z9 q. N
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? （开始求饶。）
2 O; x8 {& Q5 x  r% C5 zWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? （这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。）" p  q$ |8 j5 ^: w
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. （看来真的挺不住了。）$ x& W: u0 q1 y# ^$ a( A7 f
Watson: Worse things have happened. （得理不饶人。）
) C, _: i" o. R& SMary: John. （未婚妻看不下去了。）  C, @/ M0 C8 x! M- s
（Watson把Holmes放了下来。）6 D  i& U( y0 ]) Y; O* E7 d% V7 X
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. d4 _+ j" g0 v; u总之，这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson，一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty，暗示大家还会有第二部，第三部……