 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
0 I4 J5 E9 I5 KWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
% T. k( h! o; lHolmes: I just picked it up.
" c- b( f% Z, LWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
# t& _# W/ i h8 G1 x8 e- y HHolmes: Knew I forgot something.+ }. o" o; H* X! R% _* M
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 5 R# e% m Q1 p* f u
Holmes: You did.+ S5 j2 A# q; \! ^
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 7 }+ n0 M9 r6 U9 {
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.) C; S) D ]$ B3 M3 `8 |9 p
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
( D$ n% B1 {; ^6 }5 wWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
& _% e( s* A. y, V/ MHolmes: Granted.% }) Y0 f; \0 x4 B3 Z8 {0 D
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 8 X( Y5 L M# R d+ U
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) ) l, R0 R- {) O; b; ]! v
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 / J) [ G9 ?) q$ e- h
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) ) ~+ V5 @4 p- X+ X/ R( \
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 * w" {5 x0 e8 J, G5 }& ~2 J+ @
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0 d6 D, p- b% HBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 * [! w$ q! Z: @' b
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
5 d8 N# W! l+ s) C# n7 s& FIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?# r% |5 P# k3 |0 v
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ( i- u/ o: m1 B G- l& ]
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 3 a+ r, l: V( S( a' c4 \
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) # h8 @( h; I$ ^/ D
Watson: Get that out of my face.% [0 k D! `6 u9 N3 P5 v1 q
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.& ^, l! K( \" F& Z0 [
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.) ~9 e; L9 _' t$ P( z) d. S) z
路人警官 Clarky上场。
8 s" l& i, V, m! bClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
. W/ j; b1 z3 i- K3 oHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 3 M8 K6 _' M. y4 H
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 " Z* ]0 ~: E, N6 f
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
6 ^& M8 N+ D `/ t& @Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.# ^- V) U* P1 j( t; ^/ F) t# Z
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! h# G2 T* S6 ]9 D墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 5 G- D2 |3 s- z4 n
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
. X* b$ C4 r1 U. ~Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.) E" g6 f6 b1 p, ?: }
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) ' m! r; x2 H+ v7 T
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- o9 r- B& u+ r2 o) @河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 & z- D) z! T y% K
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ' V k9 L5 ~+ }" _
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…+ \2 [- }6 w2 L# k
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
7 z- q: ]2 k% @. O U; m3 z) Y# [死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 3 R* w/ [8 s: g- f7 U1 O( a
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
7 S, A+ i# I2 q+ v后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 : p8 [+ r! z7 R( g
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 8 O) I5 n- B1 L- d
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* F% T% O1 X% Z* a警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 + C( _% r. S# \7 i2 J6 y9 u
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.9 y; w5 b D4 l
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 8 M! D: R2 z; @9 T# v* J( p
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
1 S8 K2 e ]3 S. [& rHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
, X! Q/ \: e8 Z& Z) B4 uWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 8 C) C: L4 L! K$ p5 {3 q( B1 U% _* f
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
6 m+ N0 \+ A* i0 `Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?1 c& Q% m, X, ~7 n
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) , \1 D6 H/ j( X( ^& ~9 L# H
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) " G w I; [; S# X( H+ |( K# ~4 W
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
- X) `5 X; Q# SHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
. Y" E. m7 i5 @. K, X; m, SWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
7 C8 f4 o# m2 G3 w9 q+ iMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) . N7 b& B& u) x9 M
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) T* K1 ^6 o5 x# {
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; ]+ l G$ c s& f+ ?$ @$ b总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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