 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 3 g0 o: R o G6 Z8 \
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
* \/ h9 K3 `: ZWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
. a: Q- o$ I5 IHolmes: I just picked it up.
" u/ Q, n: U/ _! L1 }, L5 Y+ ?Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
; C* ?# S5 N" q7 L: Y3 Z5 @Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
6 B/ z+ i8 T, l3 ^Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) $ z' H0 X) G4 K0 }% B- X- J
Holmes: You did. J5 K0 R9 W/ x. I
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
: y! Q1 f* e3 W3 Z# m6 pHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.% _' S# Z) F& w1 L
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" E$ W: |# h* K0 ^宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
* C4 [7 k4 H6 m2 `Watson: Permission to enter the armory.5 Z1 `: u+ Y6 G6 I" S& Y( d
Holmes: Granted.( |* I% ^5 v1 Z, Q' C3 p( @4 f
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ' U9 J g* `6 j/ F" x: P% \$ f( P
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 2 G, k5 G5 e' V' n4 w
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3 b0 ^1 Y; {: e# k- D. a; L/ d拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 , o g4 _" h0 J2 g
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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) H1 w( P' O' r/ ^5 nHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 * w; p1 Z0 I9 a" D+ `
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" e/ f( [3 S5 MBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 4 m. _1 y6 D& d- l2 Q
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
6 ?8 `& n2 ?& J* J( z E- f" ^( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) . w; b* [$ V3 o$ Q2 q
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?3 D/ [2 T( L$ e
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 2 V& N5 Q% |0 ^) P/ P
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.0 E" J( A+ n5 b% x- j3 o
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 + o0 x t/ e+ R5 t; ^7 }( G3 s0 q ?
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
# n1 _0 g3 |9 G) \Watson: Get that out of my face.
7 p" l2 }8 u* r, q7 q, qHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
/ s2 ]6 }/ g2 KWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.. ^* j' h* h6 q4 }4 T& c9 t2 m/ z
路人警官 Clarky上场。 5 R- t1 R0 N/ ]! q& T" l
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
1 M- u& I- Y& `+ g9 X8 qHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) ; ]8 Y4 X1 K+ K4 w
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 1 d) E2 d, w; b/ W4 P: N+ O
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
^3 J+ L: o4 x G s/ jHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
) G$ E9 a! o `$ k% Z! ^( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 4 D; S7 Q5 O, b" I9 @
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.! `6 }# k+ q) G
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 1 p/ `/ K$ U' b7 f: O
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 8 \; O* ~7 D9 D$ T
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
( P6 n4 t# s1 qWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) ) X$ w6 I0 f d+ O2 v4 U2 _4 V( C
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
; C8 A2 T2 E- g+ |6 s% OHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 9 H( D; P! M U6 e- D1 @4 X0 o2 T
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
. X( y/ E) {1 y% {) s aHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) , o2 K* W# [* t- o @
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
h/ A0 b6 U+ v3 x! A# w mLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.. ?4 l1 l, ^; |
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 . Q. B* Y9 r. n4 a0 F
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
: K& x' x) p! R) b) B" r3 @Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
; v/ ^) Z2 D; d+ ]1 l( YWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) / P+ Q$ Z& h2 l5 J" z4 I! g1 r
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
- B3 X) {" K5 r* m. Z. y: F JMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
: q1 C0 Z) \ n7 ?; e3 YWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) + _) E5 T2 m" j% g
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) # j- j: j2 ~# _6 T* w% P7 e! p
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
3 ^ ~7 o5 F+ J6 c3 m$ {2 J9 ZHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
k9 q. R- g7 s* CWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 9 P; |# O+ I6 W7 S" f( x! ~7 f5 \! f# I
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
4 L$ O5 s% D. A1 K5 y+ N$ d/ d; u( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) : E9 c, o7 |4 g6 G3 s
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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