 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ' K( k8 Z8 }" G- C J
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 : o, u5 Q' S8 ?+ E2 V9 v
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
. u6 |. L& Z, nHolmes: I just picked it up.: [9 N& V/ x) A2 F9 ~" c
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
+ h! @) m, r2 JHolmes: Knew I forgot something.- m- P! d" z8 Q* i9 z; S
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) # u6 Q" {, l, @- V
Holmes: You did.
8 n1 k. G4 G, C5 [8 ](注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
" e$ j+ r5 M; G: {+ xHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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- l* ~6 x. P* ^6 h( K宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
$ K9 m! i) G4 G& UWatson: Permission to enter the armory.' {% w9 Y D& H
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 . I2 A5 \) u) A- N# a* G! K
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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2 D7 n9 ?; z& q9 y1 xWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 ' E+ K; T) C I. Z: P
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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5 x7 ]" D/ z: D vHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
! I4 o8 j: J& L$ _8 D) L/ O( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) / O* Y0 h( \& {) k* y: Z
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?! ~' l$ x S# @' _& P
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) , m0 x6 R: R$ a% n
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
9 Z8 Y0 X3 I* S# v' B* o. c# cHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
+ f% h3 m2 _8 L' T$ S' jWatson: Get that out of my face.% E4 s9 n2 L+ i5 E1 b' n" D4 R
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.2 K% r G7 C& U% F
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
# Z; T% h- o) n2 z: d3 g$ f路人警官 Clarky上场。 0 h, q+ C- X$ E8 i4 F" f
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
) p5 q3 N& @( a8 q; @5 dHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 6 ?: ^9 u7 g2 T) J
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
/ K, @ o9 P- c, HWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?2 T4 L5 a: q% L0 i2 I
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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3 M/ f4 J& }9 Y) k墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
( q @$ ?) I' z/ B$ W( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
7 Z& g6 K8 d% @$ AHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
! L& n. _9 O6 Y" bWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 7 Q1 s/ d7 f( L/ K
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- {$ I' s+ ~5 b! g. \* [8 A3 L河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
1 c4 B0 L5 q2 `3 b' PHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
1 X+ X6 Z4 U! ~2 eBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
! E$ L- z- Y u8 Z/ Z, BWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
. N. W7 Y* o. K8 |+ h m v死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
# ^/ W/ H7 m( ?, |7 kHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
8 f4 F i( x+ }3 L5 r4 K1 Y" _* c后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
$ E w/ b8 R: X7 o: s1 yHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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8 u+ w' @0 \$ Y2 ~; o; O! \0 F警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 - H( A& q' U! ?8 ?# x
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 $ Q# N6 ]7 F1 v- U/ T3 b9 }5 {/ I* Q
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
+ `$ S; k }# _6 o7 R, IHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
' y5 I5 O0 f1 l1 ^# ?1 j0 RWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
- t; u8 J% B8 oHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) 4 _: R3 U0 m6 O& z3 b8 I7 I) h
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?9 t$ z! i0 |4 b* r# P
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ' B0 n2 D2 x: w" W$ h
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
& }/ P; A/ `. F) O) G8 c2 L6 H" SWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
: ~$ I% E' p6 M. L# k- r% A( tHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
% y5 K9 b- u/ a) O) d$ ]) I0 aWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
6 }, T/ ~* c+ N& t* R% H5 ?Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
* ]0 F. C& m- n3 t( ^; u* U {5 ~( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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8 s. N8 h4 n9 L4 c总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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