 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
. F, ]* z3 w& z$ q4 FWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 6 V j6 `: U5 t2 ^4 r' L% B
Holmes: I just picked it up.
7 G5 p+ W$ O1 _, U. P1 p# UWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) . m+ k. A$ u% w, g3 k4 A2 X! }: z
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.* e! I" q( d) Z( V" Y1 n
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
' Z( u$ V1 k# ~4 rHolmes: You did.: P* P- c& p5 J9 d. w1 r
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
5 N% @# o" W1 k/ W. _( EHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.9 w7 m0 `' W& C2 h: ]5 v
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 $ E4 ?# g* V4 [7 z
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.! {4 H! t' C: s, K1 V
Holmes: Granted.% F& o" }4 ]* G0 c6 Y) ?) `( h% r
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
/ l4 W" w! p( m5 rWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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' v* v/ K# A3 k) ~! E* I) KWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
7 o9 d4 `$ o+ E1 ?: vWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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3 ]2 G& D) g; S# }0 l8 eBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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) ?/ v. A f& T) _Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 ) | @" e! C+ e2 E) i
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) / s: v" U" u) D1 x1 R
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
! @0 F' C6 w: p2 ^* SHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
1 I1 F; H; H% h' pIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope." w! C- m5 J9 B' ~
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, o# o8 ~6 k. W% y, ?Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 5 o6 K- k8 F1 r& @ {! A6 H6 n
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
5 N- g1 |2 y4 J+ F/ O3 L( uWatson: Get that out of my face." I0 w8 V! O, V+ }6 ^3 E) T6 I* s0 S& s
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
8 V" F/ G/ X3 @/ w3 L1 fWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
' q9 h" f8 @* r路人警官 Clarky上场。
$ f. X) J5 F$ T+ s2 A5 sClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
$ H1 g2 b3 F( Q: }& [( Y2 a# }: HHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 2 ~4 m0 k% S+ R7 _
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
$ C( W$ f" o7 X' ^) O; j3 @& gWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?# }: M0 G- o% x: g7 `
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.& W% {/ @3 g8 m3 m+ k ], I
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" B8 Q$ C9 S2 [' j* U T# Z" L墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 0 h' F. i. j( g/ G$ a
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
- g2 e/ _( V4 k0 vHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
% S& Z" m! y) B+ m# V9 k0 k2 w0 DWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
) H; e/ j; q) M5 ]Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ; \$ \: z, c8 Q# q7 h
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
$ L! A5 z3 j6 E4 I9 R2 ZWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
: M# H! c `% S) B: k死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
: A. P6 f4 h1 F E% z6 l! v# QHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) & @* t- {" P( g$ @! V5 }+ T
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
7 C4 x" R6 n5 [3 r8 l( J8 u# }& {Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 7 N. v h8 ?, e; b, L5 i
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1 W% l0 {' W1 t4 ^1 Q' h警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
6 W' j1 e2 J+ q# j' m3 P3 nLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 1 k) J* g* W' i: D3 b
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 4 Y) l3 r% ` s( _: ~
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
3 }6 h `3 A5 h' `' B! w! oWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
* W( X3 ~. }! h+ D2 \Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) 1 P0 e7 R- c0 M% g
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?6 Q e; f4 y. G) M; l% Y# w
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
- O2 S: D( o1 W: V: ~2 f! CHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
- I+ g8 i9 f8 }) E% B9 p' _Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) + m; V& T ^: R
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) : x! U: L. `5 I8 ~$ c
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
1 `3 |( @# V$ M; iMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
3 I& Q, X" A3 }0 w( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) ! _$ @9 d, m' n) n1 W+ {' a
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4 L, U8 F/ t2 w. D2 F总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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