 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 $ h( Y4 Q, a% T1 G
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4 S9 A3 o+ }' a+ |影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
4 v* r; N; p5 I6 O& i, sWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) : d3 u5 N/ d o# ^: f2 r- V y7 b, s
Holmes: I just picked it up.3 ]* V( g6 a4 z* Y, n" ]
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) . Q. J; t: F* }3 _" j
Holmes: Knew I forgot something./ J) D, W6 K, N" w$ U; e" Q" x
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) $ j: f# K4 q" y* U1 A1 w( x4 r
Holmes: You did.
) j, E0 n5 x8 q' L7 m& f( Y(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) ^0 |3 R& k0 }" s9 c& t) d
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.! d+ x' }, k% F% ?0 f
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
; y% I! d* }# G$ x- U2 h' g2 fWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
0 Q7 \+ t9 z& D8 t$ |Holmes: Granted.
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9 S3 `1 ]& S: v- N6 h4 [4 O9 A晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 " L8 d& h$ |' c6 }3 P
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 0 j3 v0 s5 f1 X2 B* G7 S. R, E
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
3 R) V5 F/ ?$ {9 @Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 6 a' q% e& g1 o7 l0 k
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; U V p% F8 X. Y" Z) u3 nHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 9 O" o4 `9 x( j' w* G3 c) j
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
' _% A3 z3 t L( C- z( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) * t9 f* a+ ~7 Z2 o
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
8 A+ {4 j+ j6 B% [" r3 d( I% THolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
4 W, g) Q4 R$ B2 w; {$ iIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope./ q2 p9 f. ~$ I# c/ }, A( {
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7 M5 Y9 k% V- tIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 2 |$ m$ B- `! \; v9 I! u
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
. h* t4 q5 l3 A' x& EWatson: Get that out of my face.
3 d/ I2 }9 k: e9 a e& p0 CHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.5 |7 f+ ?7 e) r" K$ f7 y$ ^) O
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.2 }- j& H9 u1 S; w% {5 [
路人警官 Clarky上场。
6 E3 G6 @& R2 LClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.$ g- X7 V5 p- V8 n# \
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
" ?1 I$ w% F' U! o q1 ~得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 0 {+ ?- V' j1 Y: o% p; Y
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
3 H5 D& ?4 u- T, L9 A/ tHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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! K. q. R1 H. m墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
( {% c' o* B- a- Z( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
. f! s, o0 c" t; P+ N CHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.( U; J0 Z! C9 [7 c& n5 ~
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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0 [6 P9 u5 v5 d' h. u* ]/ n0 {' s河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
) h, I% x7 i$ ]/ v8 r7 O- J; x2 cHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) % q9 L2 O: q5 Y* f: V3 u
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
E; ~. S3 S% l/ vWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) / L% E: d* S( m; F, I% f* ~# d
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
. _8 k' k, t( h) u) q8 FHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
Z# p/ ?" \" }2 k% \7 H后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
' o3 {4 o, W. x$ }) IHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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. n9 t# u% q# [7 K# s警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 4 b; D; U/ M! q9 T: `
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.+ {- a7 `6 V' M. H+ E$ J& f) S" D; U
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
6 G, J; \$ n* I& }0 g' K话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
2 X- Y# d6 ^6 \6 b, v/ MHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) * d% L' P: H+ y* s2 Y
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) : w7 n5 o' M A7 M( s) P9 Y( C
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) & v& t* O" J1 d) u. p6 m9 X0 Y
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?# {9 V/ g p* `- }! X
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
/ Y. h* L9 {/ d! H' yHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
' ~- R% i% T |- r8 B$ SWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
/ P) D; Y7 h" kHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) ; q+ N" g. l; I% x4 d& C- i
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
: {2 ?* [: |& v( [& H0 X# {Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
. k* B6 z. l( I$ l( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 5 p+ |4 \) H9 s1 t' j
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7 b2 L' K3 W* B: Z5 P2 C8 n- N总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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