《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。（比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。）在这个故事里，没头脑是Holmes，不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay。
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; l) M$ M- W) o7 _影片开头，Holmes启动Combo发大招，从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的Shrelock和Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
1 P" D/ Z# s# G0 j' a+ B4 NWatson: I like the hat. （吐糟开始。）, u! p3 ]+ o: j( z# d6 r8 x
Holmes: I just picked it up.
% a3 x# ]2 k, o& ~* C- pWatson: You remember your revolver? （显然没有。）
# J, R9 r2 C& [9 W- ^Holmes: Knew I forgot something." G+ B- f! Z1 n/ i
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. （吐糟继续。）- Y* k0 w; H1 B, i: E$ d0 H% w0 P& e
Holmes: You did.
. c- L* b: M4 K（注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子，吐糟。）
7 w& V+ Y: N# f7 `0 }$ JHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all./ d, b0 b1 M5 K7 e
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器（该不会因为Watson的新欢吧），枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。Watson敲Holmes的房门。
. \0 u7 {+ G: n/ }/ f' P( ]* C& zWatson: Permission to enter the armory.0 S+ ?; x* W# ~: e
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上，吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻（女性）后。
7 _8 F9 X; r* ~& \8 N9 R$ FWatson: Well done, old boy. （潜台词：very mature。）- _! ~' ^  a# K  h, j' X
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拳击场那段（Holmes启动Combo Strike之前）的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”，是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。6 s3 P' T6 y; M1 B! s
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Watson带Holmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作，发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。, d4 {, T: K& h% T
Watson: And what happens if I do this? （掀开瓶子，用手杖敲了敲，把虫子全放跑了。）
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. e8 N) O3 Q$ A% PHolmes去见Blackwood时，Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的（好吧，信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的）《约翰默示录》的一章，《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。5 F2 [9 @: x& e( H
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。- i# }0 b  ^" [
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7 [0 v$ c6 m0 @9 h/ pIrene（就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼）带着Moriarty（莫利亚蒂教授，福尔摩斯系列的最终boss）的委托来见Holmes。
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Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
$ o9 e0 L8 }6 i. U6 E; KHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? （这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。）. M: y( s: A& f" ~2 v9 O  \) b
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开，Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场，玩儿命吐糟仰慕Irene的Holmes，建议Holmes远离麻烦（leave the case alone）。
7 ~4 e/ f$ v2 pHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. （醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。）2 ]4 j% u" g5 e7 e; q+ T- I( E2 q% M' \
Watson: Get that out of my face.
/ v8 g- W6 G: \2 A+ BHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.  a  j, F$ Y+ u
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
6 s( l9 ?. p% a; x8 a2 E路人警官Clarky上场。
$ l* S2 i7 Z& t& B3 U8 R) Q$ aClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.# B/ S0 g5 e( A9 \
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. （面对伦敦警察，一种智力的优越感油然而生。）
9 F& I/ X. T9 }$ J得知Blackwood死而复活后，Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。$ \3 I  p( o4 a4 u' J
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
$ c- f- a: }/ z+ v6 QHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.0 |' z9 h1 u# f' z' [0 E
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' s% D" J* U/ V6 S4 \5 W墓地勘查后，Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场，诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母，Holmes独自调查死者的住处。/ N7 {  U; ?4 `# L! z" P  v( Q
（Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。）  S! F8 {& r( j1 T0 a
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
, S2 q5 j) j4 h% S6 F& I, hWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. （我们管这叫傲娇。）$ }2 Y7 d# ^) Z  L3 Q# e0 v
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' n, a4 T. t( o河边屠宰场，Blackwood装13地出场后。
6 M5 v! H  I; T/ @" W' sHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. （吐糟。）
: d; [# {2 V* A; [- A' }Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
! L2 M# E3 q# R3 IWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. （再吐。）; ~  S) U) Y6 f; e4 P+ Y
死亡机器开动，火焰包围了Sherck和Irene。6 p9 e( \8 a! x) Y
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson （其实快被烤焦了。）' Y1 X. H; l3 T$ j: Z3 c
后来解Watson的皮带（挂在链子上增大阻力）。3 e5 k" V, Z$ @2 t
Holmes: Don’t get excited. （汗。）
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4 m' y/ O) P6 }' u, v5 w# `: Q警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes，看到地上推理用的画符（顺便说一句，那作案顺序实在太古典了）。
# t, x+ I; w1 z; n+ i$ j, m% M" VLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.! g  _" k  f( B# p& _# b/ q
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接下来的吐糟点不多了，因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后，才有了新笑点。对了，决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
5 o4 V5 i- V) ]3 \- I' H; F9 W% q话说Watson和未婚妻Mary向Holmes道别，发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
+ D: ^) S4 I( ?  H4 Z( Q% z, ~/ o3 [Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. （吐糟Watson）But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. （暗示Watson放他下来。）Good afternoon, dear. （向Mary问好。）
' u0 T, b: \( OWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. （淡定。）
: e* N4 |/ j5 ~/ D, [+ F, m+ }Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. （再次暗示Watson放他下来。）
, A3 l: \* U, @9 GMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
3 \+ C( x; ?0 M$ Q, r/ C9 L& ~Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. （淡定。）% M! Y. R  k4 b5 D; N) a# F
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? （开始求饶。）# `) q, I$ i8 {) s" {
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? （这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。）
* W( H7 W9 C/ E, h. m9 E6 U" D  YHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. （看来真的挺不住了。）$ s. ~/ d* [# T
Watson: Worse things have happened. （得理不饶人。）
; r1 M7 U) Z7 j6 k) V, NMary: John. （未婚妻看不下去了。）, U+ _, q9 S+ E9 H5 M( k9 c0 ~3 h/ h5 }
（Watson把Holmes放了下来。）4 r# \- V' T$ j" I1 |$ {5 _
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总之，这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson，一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty，暗示大家还会有第二部，第三部……