 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
2 D: t- @# L: tWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
" q& W& c. R( W6 A! h: W- I# qHolmes: I just picked it up., G% ^0 ^' j1 ] ~' C
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) ' j/ U3 D9 Q& O
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.8 g/ m Y" q# r5 E* a, l8 `8 z2 j5 `
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
3 _' r9 E1 R& G" AHolmes: You did.# J, b0 a/ @6 [/ x& t
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
+ q- m4 f1 }/ m g; X9 ?( c# q/ rHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 $ H! ^+ K( s/ Y% J5 k
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
. z9 j3 h) B& e0 ~0 Q1 L0 l" pHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 - E0 x1 { h8 a
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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6 Q! @7 J% Z( G+ u4 C+ v9 }" n8 z. n拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
' O- J% P' \* J4 K! MWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) + K, W0 B& D4 f# G
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* C; t% w# e: dHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 1 M1 I. g# P# H, V. E1 |$ m
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7 H, N2 g4 e" ?; F# Q8 K# LBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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6 G9 O3 J+ |5 d0 G& @Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 ' G* v3 @ S% x8 O
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 3 L" [1 ]) \6 E3 C2 u( Z
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
( o" h6 ^3 p& {* h9 KHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) $ E2 x% U$ q6 j9 Y& o: n) A; |
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
0 h8 z/ q; |: o9 PHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) # V, g4 E" _/ P' O
Watson: Get that out of my face.
; o, |) r" Q( |9 HHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
& s! c0 u; {0 c5 y% C3 ^Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.. w7 t9 W% ~/ l# o
路人警官 Clarky上场。 h J; E Z9 |% U0 O
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
3 L$ L! H7 _5 V( l7 ^Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
0 b& O9 d" s+ R% |: d( q得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 8 v* n# N/ z. x6 J2 P
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes? T q8 q3 z7 ?+ G# x
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.+ Q' Y A" U7 p! W$ O
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3 N+ c+ P$ E5 ]. ~9 _7 B墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
8 j& U5 [% Q- y$ P9 v$ g( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
1 i, k# O' J$ [: d$ v8 B/ Y7 o$ j8 y: hHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
& F, r1 T9 n% L7 UWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) , c, v! {) ?) s; }9 S& ?" W
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# ]/ }/ \" x2 W河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 @' K( q, j2 o- b" [
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 4 E* m! F: L" D* V( j! D4 x
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
& L+ l) @! a8 o7 Z1 {. U YWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
; _; B# u, v9 l8 _1 z1 K死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 $ \; c. {. ~/ y f- o
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
! E3 X- g1 o/ l+ _4 E; t* [# e4 g% k后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
1 ^# D2 U, j5 f# p1 hHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) + B5 ^! y' s% G) D* @& [8 C
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
: p. x% F' L V: uLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.- x/ c/ X: S" j; \- j* `
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4 V& \* \$ u/ J ]4 r4 ~接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 0 K9 e: A/ u8 n" y% L3 J ~' v( D& n, [
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
* J6 q! U9 n# ZHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
' i, b9 r& D2 Z2 m' FWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 2 T5 ~/ ~) `4 \
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
9 x% s( v, C. W {& \: FMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?% x* y. @! m8 z2 f7 Q9 f
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
& j( i& c& v; p" Q3 hHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
9 M1 y: Y6 I' I* K2 l; i5 `Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
! O2 B/ e! n; x: D+ g: @) ]2 t4 cHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
9 C5 y% W/ B8 Y* g% HWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 9 _# p+ I: e) e5 \) Z) X; H
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
- E6 P1 g Q" w4 {8 t( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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4 H2 J1 q, ?& s8 D$ \: Q0 p6 G总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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