《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。（比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。）在这个故事里，没头脑是Holmes，不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay。
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影片开头，Holmes启动Combo发大招，从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的Shrelock和Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
; ]7 G8 i) ^, `, {) nWatson: I like the hat. （吐糟开始。）
  R" o0 i* H0 G( |0 |1 Z' O6 o) V0 DHolmes: I just picked it up.
. R/ k: j# Y& z4 L) NWatson: You remember your revolver? （显然没有。）$ s/ |5 b/ P% ], U! m; n8 b5 P! D3 j
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.' b2 I! M& {: a0 G& Y$ Y
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. （吐糟继续。）1 K- Q  b# Y+ W+ s  B+ o) w
Holmes: You did.0 t: \  n1 \3 q% |7 `+ v0 Z
（注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子，吐糟。）
9 y! }7 ^$ \( s7 l, b; t& @" ~Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all., @; P0 O4 ~7 i: Y$ e1 e. U
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器（该不会因为Watson的新欢吧），枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。Watson敲Holmes的房门。
: R+ ^$ R! U) e7 r( _. dWatson: Permission to enter the armory.2 D6 J$ o. R0 e  ~0 p7 e5 ~
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上，吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻（女性）后。
, J# F) Q+ B1 C8 jWatson: Well done, old boy. （潜台词：very mature。）0 M6 w) n+ D& F- Q- X
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拳击场那段（Holmes启动Combo Strike之前）的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”，是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带Holmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作，发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。0 K: P1 C% P2 D$ r
Watson: And what happens if I do this? （掀开瓶子，用手杖敲了敲，把虫子全放跑了。）
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+ q, H5 N, m: \" {7 {5 Z) Y& AHolmes去见Blackwood时，Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的（好吧，信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的）《约翰默示录》的一章，《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。3 q$ s" n( J2 C. _1 r/ ?% z: V
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' T( ~6 c- k. `2 t7 oBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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/ L! Y( g7 w6 n  t1 H$ R' L# lIrene（就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼）带着Moriarty（莫利亚蒂教授，福尔摩斯系列的最终boss）的委托来见Holmes。
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Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
% k7 D% H! z9 mHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? （这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。）
# R5 P& Q/ W. X# sIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开，Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场，玩儿命吐糟仰慕Irene的Holmes，建议Holmes远离麻烦（leave the case alone）。
8 w9 O8 q5 s# n! R6 ]Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. （醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。）
6 d8 a9 X. _3 y0 E" i& DWatson: Get that out of my face.3 j1 s* B5 A; v7 I4 i% a2 V  C; [
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.( L; @6 u; a$ }/ P0 E
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
+ e; ^) s+ u+ N7 s路人警官Clarky上场。
/ B& v9 H( B0 YClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
# f( ~* s4 H& T- o% P# j) r5 ?) R$ MHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. （面对伦敦警察，一种智力的优越感油然而生。）* \) l; o; W% V
得知Blackwood死而复活后，Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
( [3 T9 O' J6 m" X; rWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?/ {0 k' F. L8 E. C2 s6 _2 G; G0 z
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后，Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场，诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母，Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
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Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
$ A5 w5 c1 @' e, \' q( N0 IWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. （我们管这叫傲娇。）
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0 S7 u. O6 w# h1 p. Q河边屠宰场，Blackwood装13地出场后。/ L; ?5 \6 n+ Q4 s4 J: i) M
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. （吐糟。）9 z! ?5 p; f# d
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
7 B" S/ T, N' D9 e- B! N3 QWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. （再吐。）
, D. ]" O+ H; h  |/ k8 V死亡机器开动，火焰包围了Sherck和Irene。
' F0 m' v4 I, @' `  s% v: G% N( IHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson （其实快被烤焦了。）
, d' Y7 B5 t) M# R后来解Watson的皮带（挂在链子上增大阻力）。
# W( [  E+ ~6 g& c9 l6 {Holmes: Don’t get excited. （汗。）# }) R! ^& H6 i& a* y0 e& D
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5 }- \+ E# |  k( ^! {7 V警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes，看到地上推理用的画符（顺便说一句，那作案顺序实在太古典了）。
& @& c7 K; _  s6 S' JLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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( k7 Q6 M6 r% S4 t接下来的吐糟点不多了，因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后，才有了新笑点。对了，决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
! v/ J6 `" `3 Y& q话说Watson和未婚妻Mary向Holmes道别，发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。0 N% g# A- C! L' R7 J
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. （吐糟Watson）But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. （暗示Watson放他下来。）Good afternoon, dear. （向Mary问好。）. c( e: ~5 ]- f0 |/ J0 e1 r
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. （淡定。）
. J# g6 y5 Z/ L2 _8 H9 M* E4 UHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. （再次暗示Watson放他下来。）
8 k6 j! b; j: w  T: MMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?  z: j! H- q$ ~
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. （淡定。）9 R4 I- e; d- m( o* h& `
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? （开始求饶。）
) ^. ^" }8 M- ~2 Y6 eWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? （这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。）& ~6 Q9 q. _2 e7 k; f6 D1 W3 \
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. （看来真的挺不住了。）1 `/ o+ O9 D2 x; J. s
Watson: Worse things have happened. （得理不饶人。）
6 b2 D8 e( {3 f, E( Q1 uMary: John. （未婚妻看不下去了。）. z1 m1 n, c. ~6 k7 u
（Watson把Holmes放了下来。）
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, r% J  E9 ~2 u# I- y0 q! h1 m: {: z总之，这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson，一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty，暗示大家还会有第二部，第三部……