《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。（比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。）在这个故事里，没头脑是Holmes，不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay。
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影片开头，Holmes启动Combo发大招，从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的Shrelock和Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
9 M8 |, k2 y6 h! R% f! ?3 s  {Watson: I like the hat. （吐糟开始。）
  L2 ?& [. P# [( t/ L& {. eHolmes: I just picked it up.# x" l2 Y# ]$ J$ ?9 ~
Watson: You remember your revolver? （显然没有。）7 v' c0 q! e5 [# z: p0 B
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.) f$ B" g% o+ j) D, c, J
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. （吐糟继续。）1 M. }  B( ~% Z
Holmes: You did.) l! i7 A# k6 c/ H2 C
（注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子，吐糟。）9 g! ]0 `1 y7 c
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.1 d1 ]9 Z3 I% t5 {. M
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器（该不会因为Watson的新欢吧），枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。Watson敲Holmes的房门。: ?' G$ C1 J0 e) S
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.$ S$ m" s7 t( \( \  e3 `1 ^6 V9 N; Z
Holmes: Granted.% @1 o5 y0 T. k, f) R, l6 f* G$ w
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/ t' l/ |7 `  Q1 L3 B晚餐桌上，吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻（女性）后。
, _! {. g2 D! c5 rWatson: Well done, old boy. （潜台词：very mature。）
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拳击场那段（Holmes启动Combo Strike之前）的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”，是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带Holmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作，发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
0 q9 Y. M, p: KWatson: And what happens if I do this? （掀开瓶子，用手杖敲了敲，把虫子全放跑了。）
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4 }$ Q2 Q- m% \& s; B% LHolmes去见Blackwood时，Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的（好吧，信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的）《约翰默示录》的一章，《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。# m& J, v# k7 B" a' H
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  a0 Q+ Q& c& SBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。  n( n- F0 ~: l7 p* N* C( |$ e) ~3 ^. V
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( Z. Q4 B* i9 v7 M1 c" cIrene（就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼）带着Moriarty（莫利亚蒂教授，福尔摩斯系列的最终boss）的委托来见Holmes。" O1 ^& m* X( R$ z6 g1 y9 x5 W
（Irene掏信，Holmes惊慌失措）7 z( f* S. P8 V( n3 ^
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?1 ^. B) a, p' F" s& J
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? （这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。）5 \* Q  X/ h6 [- Q  q
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.* H) T0 P) X5 k6 c+ C, V
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Irene离开，Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场，玩儿命吐糟仰慕Irene的Holmes，建议Holmes远离麻烦（leave the case alone）。9 {( r& |" R% Y# {, D1 h
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. （醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。）
$ A! Y' R; j8 h+ VWatson: Get that out of my face.
. h$ c9 Y+ p5 K' h; v/ bHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
% ?2 `2 \* p& @) L- HWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
. M: U7 Y4 A6 v+ m+ S) R8 t5 |$ ~* p路人警官Clarky上场。
" L4 w! Q+ ?+ M, P+ |9 W% VClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
' \8 ]1 O4 S6 m/ |Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. （面对伦敦警察，一种智力的优越感油然而生。）
4 k# Q  M, m# ^/ X得知Blackwood死而复活后，Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。' T8 b4 C0 e1 m* {( g4 w
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?5 s7 e- {  O/ O3 S+ l. h8 V
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.3 @% e2 E( x6 s( q
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( D) r1 O7 `0 B6 }( e" k墓地勘查后，Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场，诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母，Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
! o& H0 [2 `- q! S: c; N+ l8 c  B（Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。）
' |, @) E" u3 `9 P# CHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.. S9 ?- j. I# {4 f. U7 E1 {
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. （我们管这叫傲娇。）
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河边屠宰场，Blackwood装13地出场后。8 r1 O" M7 G) |" t
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. （吐糟。）
4 B8 H' ?( k* d' `9 b: X3 yBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…( G$ Y0 c$ Y5 o( `
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. （再吐。）
0 Z  v9 s) Y4 ]: U死亡机器开动，火焰包围了Sherck和Irene。
/ a& X. q9 X+ oHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson （其实快被烤焦了。）3 |& N0 @9 p: q  C/ C6 y* g
后来解Watson的皮带（挂在链子上增大阻力）。
; J+ P# ]; ]- fHolmes: Don’t get excited. （汗。）
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes，看到地上推理用的画符（顺便说一句，那作案顺序实在太古典了）。
; [' c. l) L1 g6 SLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.9 P+ c0 C* h  q2 k8 |" ]
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+ ~: i9 D# P- j, L9 x# Y$ X接下来的吐糟点不多了，因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后，才有了新笑点。对了，决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
9 {$ |* F5 f5 B6 H7 r3 @! o话说Watson和未婚妻Mary向Holmes道别，发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
5 _# @5 c) g1 z1 nHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. （吐糟Watson）But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. （暗示Watson放他下来。）Good afternoon, dear. （向Mary问好。）3 N2 q2 f8 \% m$ r6 t
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. （淡定。）
: r1 C" k0 T2 ?) p% A. X1 S8 }; oHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. （再次暗示Watson放他下来。）
  `2 d+ N4 d) p& ?  c2 m) QMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?6 x' c: F; t+ G' ?
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. （淡定。）! p3 {3 Z/ u( g& U
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? （开始求饶。）1 C% n# d. ^6 x) y  ~  M, J
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? （这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。）& y! ~! @5 E. d) I# O7 K( _. W/ C
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. （看来真的挺不住了。）
5 m7 k- p/ A/ \0 E9 i9 n# Q' Y9 MWatson: Worse things have happened. （得理不饶人。）
" E% `% y1 @! T3 z% q$ s) lMary: John. （未婚妻看不下去了。）) }, N  a0 X5 F& V& w
（Watson把Holmes放了下来。）
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总之，这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson，一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty，暗示大家还会有第二部，第三部……