 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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6 H2 I, j' Y6 \影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
" ]* A0 s1 F/ h- \# p( RWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
6 P- }# y- i7 f# B& g6 P/ tHolmes: I just picked it up.
! y% }0 N! c% @8 f+ vWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) # x# }3 ]7 ]2 W! F' V, O. {
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
$ m' {6 a7 u+ s" n% \' |. t6 K0 QWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
' f S& G: n7 m8 C6 E2 AHolmes: You did.( O3 W- J3 a$ r/ w& v5 ~
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) . Q0 n) B8 a; H
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all." s! q" o9 A5 b" W" M% T1 k1 @* r4 L
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 . H7 _; ]9 U5 a7 W, j
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
0 ]" S7 |" @4 u% |! b5 |/ YHolmes: Granted.
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( T6 Q/ C# n; u. |晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 : |9 h+ B& U5 A# u
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
$ V) p1 C2 Y7 EWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 9 ^: K- B- b; E2 c0 ?$ c+ [: g; k
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/ a- V6 C6 R( @+ AHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 0 u" G8 U2 v. a. \5 w
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
7 T) F! X+ i! v' K0 p5 b) V( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
7 V; R. ~: y! YIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
X8 Y3 C/ ?' s! n4 vHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) * B3 r' W# B/ } t# O# }$ P" `% } M
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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( m, \& |( f6 n e' P5 G1 aIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ; ?. N/ a" j' s4 Z" f
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
/ D+ O }- S; F+ X! [$ LWatson: Get that out of my face.
4 @% K1 c, s$ ~; PHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.' b8 E# L- J! {3 O
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
2 U5 C; E) |. T" {路人警官 Clarky上场。
1 w' j7 W& i% g! VClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
. j8 b* S3 p) y% _1 e' HHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
4 e! E7 e# f8 G, t5 I( {5 N7 Q# z得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 " s* K# \- l: ]3 W! H* Z4 W
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
0 P+ n% U6 [( {. QHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 7 G2 ~4 h$ P0 E. V
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
* d8 \5 d2 p+ T& \Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.# ^% q6 S5 i* }1 B0 S L" W
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
$ D1 N( p! c/ L9 q. M0 [/ ?% FHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
& m$ O) A4 s, r9 B4 d% x! Y7 @Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…( a' ?5 E4 A( W. b2 [! w2 Y7 c4 H& t
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) ! n! V& H+ j1 o& k
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
( W; B W* X' M: ]Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
/ `& ^. i' p: B1 u% J! K6 r& E后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
- u4 D+ _5 r4 r sHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) ! ~8 R3 Y$ b9 j
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" f4 }" N6 h/ y, g警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
2 \& a B, L) {3 W) pLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing." K! L i+ W. O& A9 E5 i4 _
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
# C2 {$ M# H2 D话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 8 A7 c t% A9 \& T. ^, R
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 6 l5 j4 |. I+ h4 w6 D* @
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
% F5 a) I6 c' z$ G* }2 I& u8 \Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) * ~: a; t% k# C: ~1 W2 x
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?3 ~3 k0 u# p2 f5 x
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
4 n {- v( ?' r+ s( j; X% {Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) I# e2 g& ?7 n, ]
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) ' m" u% _( R: B+ m1 G. V8 Z/ l. r& ]
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
& t' F) f3 v( [5 x6 PWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) ) a) q' H0 B4 z( L* a2 A
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) ( i$ H9 ]; n1 ~; m5 N
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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5 [( `9 W7 O4 }, g# ]& P! ?# d总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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