 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 4 n; M3 h7 A5 ]4 b. Z
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
& c- @( V: h" c: f+ WWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) , c$ |. I2 J( i8 E
Holmes: I just picked it up., s2 [' L9 R% t4 M& ]1 W
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
& O ~8 [' I5 [- ZHolmes: Knew I forgot something.$ J8 X7 O9 R; R1 j
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 8 K7 v) u8 E) I' C5 q
Holmes: You did.
6 K* z) Y; D/ I& t% Q2 b(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) * ^' S' v1 L ~! T& K$ H
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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2 `0 h3 X7 O3 n+ }1 S宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
4 \3 D- a! V' [& d$ w! H4 A2 nWatson: Permission to enter the armory.6 C. j+ h. [* x* h3 I
Holmes: Granted.& C) k" E4 y( V% @
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 7 {, e& X% \1 k$ P6 F
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) / ~ C8 \; I; Z+ s/ t
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% _( G; b7 O, X9 h$ ~5 g+ ]拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
! o$ o, n9 ~' u1 _5 q* l- F3 @Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 7 D/ a _1 P! ]. `
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 6 W' P8 t* x8 U, H' M( y
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
" L9 y) c2 G rHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 4 D0 P1 H* I- f' i/ f# w
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope./ {6 ~9 j7 p' M% t# f
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# t. ^4 B% L' o7 E- N& V6 aIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 1 T7 O; g& v& _' C$ m1 G
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
! d, a; r r- a3 c! e6 L# J4 xWatson: Get that out of my face.
* K1 `8 f- }% }1 g" A& C N( b, [+ ?( `Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.) [' r+ D. m) H) l
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face., T/ U' S0 `. Y' @; [
路人警官 Clarky上场。 - G! C: w, F# |$ u5 e- h9 {
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
3 [6 e+ s, ~) i4 nHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
+ k4 ]! i2 X% a" T& x8 |7 O, [得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
: ]$ @# A T. TWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
% o; m0 l5 H* K3 z$ t! u* HHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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" U! Y5 ^# ~, o. t4 y$ T墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
1 Q) p; n/ r0 P" b& U% ]) f( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
/ X. ?# }2 @ s* d$ AHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
0 U) y, u, m0 _Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 7 Q9 G+ F3 s* R/ j. P7 U: ~/ n. L
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
% ]4 |7 b- s# sHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
; I) F# B: m! h. K. u9 C" gBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…* K ` }, M# ~
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) & C7 e2 x5 i/ D2 e& P6 ~$ b
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 $ H3 x2 o' c6 E8 |$ c
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) , R* z* o* n9 V) c* I# m5 R& V
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
% _8 U5 @- G$ iHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) ' c" L! k+ c8 ~: {9 K# D; c
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% }3 j4 S/ I* N; l警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 * m5 l* B0 M. G' A, p
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.3 O0 }; W7 s: W$ B" N$ N, Y
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! O+ @/ y0 n& Q接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
4 U2 E0 n; ?3 h5 T+ ?0 l7 X话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 1 ?# }' l5 w6 z. V/ w8 M, j
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 7 V! D% T, }* T& f! R$ W$ c0 f
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
3 ]* S) _# v" @Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) % a. {" j+ x; m+ b# i u+ b
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?/ ^" K+ q b) J' \9 f3 k% ?
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) : L, E0 o/ H! o2 _7 T
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) ! a4 C% C0 c! G4 N! |8 |5 I4 J
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
, y4 k7 V/ {+ O' bHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 9 p; c4 G# {/ q1 i' x3 u
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 7 }4 O5 X6 Y$ k
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
2 b+ z7 W) t8 c; o; `3 ^3 O( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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