 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
3 T: s" t, O6 ~Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) - b* P# o' T5 K/ g; g' B
Holmes: I just picked it up.5 D/ J2 D- V6 a- `% v
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) , k5 m) @ V2 @9 l% N' Y
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
& P! V4 V5 l& U5 X& e0 ~Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
6 [; i: I8 u# R6 mHolmes: You did.8 ^( v, ]9 s) T! y- M
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 7 Z# M2 |- L; O! S- Y' [7 Q; U
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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# ?* `* w2 e& ^9 k宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
V/ m8 _ s% O( RWatson: Permission to enter the armory.3 v; H; k( H$ A. ^5 Z$ l
Holmes: Granted.3 o4 l* Y( {2 `; o+ M! k
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ! J0 U, C3 X! I) ]& S
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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. q" N, ~! L) }% ^5 AWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 / O- @8 C7 f8 L6 r- I- n8 Z- C
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 3 ~& L' K1 P- I! T
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. m2 f) Y& B5 g" pHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 3 P) w( M3 ], i5 y- S2 Q
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
! }+ @& J/ ` r/ u; R# G% G2 J( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
* u, |; ~; I0 gIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
& M8 ]# U! X; |8 X# s& c4 t" i l& MHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
6 D Y# G! a2 m0 f; aIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.% C, D3 ~& M& e5 T3 P1 G9 k
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/ A; U1 C: D0 a: [" GIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 ) A, g- ?( f8 f% G# f5 c
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
2 j; x1 x8 S+ m ?' a0 h8 W5 JWatson: Get that out of my face.
8 Q* @# Q7 }! X! VHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
$ S8 ~- t" X$ ^9 U8 e4 aWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.1 ^: }2 m! p2 R' x0 J/ e
路人警官 Clarky上场。 ( `, g4 K. U! `5 ]' n
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
- H& g' |0 G4 d2 U" U& A) MHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
0 x6 O- a/ x0 v ^得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 & E/ H8 M! U8 y& c4 r( S; V7 c! W: i
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
J0 Z) m2 M! n( L$ W$ BHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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- J" w$ ^( v" k' ]墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
# t; ]- C. w+ {: Q% |2 `( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
% G" D, O- A2 Z3 zHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
9 ?" V6 ~7 S1 F+ `: X# V, z* v iWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 0 a2 U H' \- j, t
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) ! f/ B- a. H: \: a g2 K; y. p
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
# I" i. G- d. L, u. jWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
4 w5 B' ]9 B% M8 o6 @( a3 d8 m$ b死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 3 I% U& Z5 X+ a( W4 T8 ~
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 4 t; \+ ? ]. c" Q0 X1 O' g
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 ; ^9 M/ T! n! o- {
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 8 Y9 W4 M+ `# T7 _
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
) E9 e* V( b0 V: p/ |Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.3 M5 o0 c0 M0 u) T3 f4 O
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2 J& g) u6 R e6 |接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
& e' Z. L8 s8 S4 r1 c3 R话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
$ m. M% p' m$ CHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
: w0 A7 s/ y/ N# Y* x: B6 V( G; mWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
5 f! s/ L' x* W0 b2 w8 Y" mHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
W2 b6 J% R* A" c0 h) mMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
! Q0 D- w/ Z! cWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ! O% ]2 e, \; l& k$ F/ V
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) - Q& L0 e# A6 ^' _! i. J
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
2 `1 n8 ~ I$ `! R, S% Z9 sHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
/ V" Z% f. r# S' l* L6 ]; GWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
" w* Z- ^- b& oMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
: w0 Y" r, C3 v/ m( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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0 Y' Y% c {7 I% P: U$ F总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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