 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 9 b. F' H3 G$ t% F2 x3 A! H
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7 o6 z! h) N' V6 n1 W* R6 R' J( _影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 6 `0 E z: _; o$ h2 O
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
4 x% K8 k' }% u v. \Holmes: I just picked it up.
8 u; ^! W0 r6 d1 Y) {$ O6 j% [& u0 ?Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
. @2 R9 z; S8 j" z b4 PHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
" y; H# W% u ? w) i5 g" ]( lWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 9 _) S( v" C5 @6 |
Holmes: You did.7 D3 d! Y% L( @2 O
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
# Z/ A- C2 G( r- ?1 `. QHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.2 j" Z$ [" b% @
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9 l1 s* D$ d( K5 ~& @/ R宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 / K) s9 f( I& D% b% C9 @8 f7 g
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.& g* W- U; h. V
Holmes: Granted.$ y/ d+ j% T6 O! _6 w
3.
' W5 ]" V- r: F& G6 [# X晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 6 l, i9 {4 _1 G/ r9 w5 O# K- e _
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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7 @; ]$ k$ P* k! y; R; `, ?8 K3 PWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 S7 y8 ] `/ z$ N- O
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 9 C5 Y& Z4 w/ H
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, S" Z% i/ f3 o ]Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
; e/ i* ?" r# F, o( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
# l$ k0 K1 S$ d" `$ ], HIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
2 d( y$ N. t: H. bHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 9 k( S i: Y$ T+ ^1 \
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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1 r9 }5 v% ]2 |; O: e% g/ gIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
- Y" u; y8 |- R5 m0 CHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
, f7 k; D: l( e5 v8 zWatson: Get that out of my face.
& H7 W& K4 F4 N: T. xHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand. ]) U. w: z) j
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
; z5 k! X- p3 r路人警官 Clarky上场。 ! D/ t- n! W3 z1 \2 \" V% y
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
0 H2 g( s, f! N$ R8 z/ `Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
: B# b6 e. L0 T得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ! z) @& Z/ i9 ?; o. K* j4 h! t
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
{- X3 F# ~+ SHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.: a4 _: f2 N- t* B4 S a
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 3 }) L1 K% ?5 H% @& q. Q1 d* u! B. |
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 6 U J9 a$ Q1 A! }
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.% I) t# Z1 E& z, C" P# x
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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: g2 x; Q; W9 b/ C: v河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 ; |, y, c" u: N
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) . O: z3 b3 _" y% E* k. z
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
' w: H U6 W3 U- l5 j) h) \: a0 NWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
) h- T2 Z8 {, Q$ l死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
. f0 Q" U& v0 l% `9 w. H" tHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
+ A3 {5 {1 T+ @, Z9 `, R/ O后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
/ V, a6 N5 r4 Q$ r7 j. HHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) ( M2 a9 j4 @' e* w
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) W' c: Q9 O6 ]! u$ M警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 ; ^/ K% L; Y/ E
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.; T5 l+ U+ w. h, c5 F! s+ D0 i
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2 C& R% q7 @5 _; }9 O接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 9 K& q$ I, a+ M' t9 o7 E3 ~# f/ f
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 9 y" s" j' R8 L+ S, `" W
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) , g; K7 D- |/ E. L; Z
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
5 x# p, C' ] n9 z5 P6 q) qHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) " M% v! u( u' C: Z. f. A0 @
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
- Y+ |1 |- P' HWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 1 V$ d% R Q3 q+ Q) s) I9 w( @
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
' F3 d9 B0 v$ L( n" p$ w' NWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) - n3 M% ?4 U. N7 d0 n& a
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
) {% Z- z0 Z& S! F( ?Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
& h' O( ]+ f8 Z; RMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
! x7 m. I3 d7 S* J3 y( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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