 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 " w! S9 b0 q# S$ m0 }
***********
2 d" I& { \3 E+ }1. 5 u$ J: a0 }2 t% V3 X5 e! F8 |
影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 ) Y/ l* t- R, [. @
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
# Q' q: ^" s3 \. \Holmes: I just picked it up.
! X) [# h2 @0 v- m- b3 ^Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) : w7 c' V# I4 Z" F! t. o) R+ S# d1 \- M
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.5 g/ \$ R0 E' r
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) : r% v$ c7 m% ~% z3 `
Holmes: You did.( @$ b) K& ^) `
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) ; z. ]0 y2 P4 T/ ?
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
: b' }3 J a, F6 a9 F! @2.
8 z6 t e; }* S宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ! m7 h" q. z; @3 v y# g, M1 K
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
, a8 F. U/ d- s: k: DHolmes: Granted.
- A# Z: _5 @7 ~3 D, e9 e( F3.3 S+ i; k. b0 k( k( X
晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 9 [' B/ A/ s( ^' p m4 o
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 0 o7 c+ R3 L( D3 e9 X( g! H @6 Q
4. * Z. T* H$ \8 @
拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 / z6 f1 m) T. y- a5 f+ V6 @! ?
5. A& N7 R( R- ] M% i8 N; p
Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
, Q# P2 F) S9 l) s3 i- aWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 2 r$ h) V* O4 f' y
6. ) i* B G. K( J& T5 W. Y
Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
2 Y% |* c- Z3 a7. $ M* {, z; G/ U
Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 ! Q# r0 n- ]" }2 U3 r' A0 v
8. 0 n8 g8 \ T5 g: x# d
Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 7 v' t9 `5 z8 q2 E1 m, S; _
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
( }. `8 ~6 K# U/ a- c& hIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
|4 K9 S+ U$ j* O6 a. gHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) |* M- i d8 F q
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
" E) z) ]& d9 l3 C9.
; h, Z9 x+ b, a6 Y6 T1 C0 wIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 4 F- M6 i% a) Z# F1 g
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ( Y1 R- S8 H3 x
Watson: Get that out of my face.
) w( _+ a4 Q) ~0 x! OHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.& N0 K" f( C8 g' Y2 W! t4 O
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
{: y# w7 @, {" Y- H0 o路人警官 Clarky上场。
) ?: {" w' A& A1 k* j) s6 l4 V2 L" rClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
" \! Y# D( b# W0 t, `8 bHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) - X$ ?, H4 O7 J6 S$ \( i
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
" o/ N+ K4 P2 y8 i( EWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
* q7 j3 M! {# \9 h: iHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.9 _* y5 c9 m4 j5 p
10.& b9 Z% _' o7 `! B
墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 0 |2 i" c h/ A4 e0 [2 Y* @
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
7 r1 X7 i6 o9 Z* [& P7 {Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.1 }' q% M* R, B7 d: ^% d1 S& z
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
; _7 W8 N2 u& e6 d/ h" b11.
# U7 }/ H# c' @$ C河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
. \% n' K6 e) _4 P+ b; C; }Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 9 H* y' q8 n m. B; d$ M
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
4 s p+ ~( J4 I. r jWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) ( N1 _1 Y4 g" ?" B% z9 h
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 4 \& z1 x- Q* H
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 1 J" e8 D+ v* l3 O2 l
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
" }6 w6 ]* f3 C( q, o5 QHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
, B* p. ]$ y: E12. & k; z7 c6 h( [1 ~# N
警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 $ ^6 s1 U2 w2 o& b2 h# y6 V
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
K. V4 ~* q, A0 k5 a13.4 [3 D1 T8 N1 J3 U4 q8 E
接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 # f: N: w# K% |6 M1 X; P
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
# G) U# `1 c) c; y' y' qHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 9 z! Z) ~+ O; C3 o- ]/ V
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) # B- ^0 _ t( } b4 u5 e5 j/ d
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
) H0 ]. M7 z4 X; Z; B" }Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
! n. a/ l# n& T1 m+ n; ?$ K- I# SWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 1 c+ C$ o9 @7 S) O3 k* S- h
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) % j* K3 x6 E! p5 g1 J3 g
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 7 o; X4 G7 O( J* M; A6 f/ a$ ]
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
" W: P2 n2 z3 V' M% i+ S9 ?* b- y' PWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 0 m" x; ]# |( y c: B$ s! |5 ]) q# {
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
0 y2 j; r% Q" f. o+ _( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
/ ~; H2 K" x. H0 W***********
) I) t% P- V2 w; M, {总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
| |  | |  |
|
|