《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。（比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。）在这个故事里，没头脑是Holmes，不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay。
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* l$ q3 t/ w+ j) c影片开头，Holmes启动Combo发大招，从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的Shrelock和Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。" |. p. }& O. w) K5 c2 d
Watson: I like the hat. （吐糟开始。）) X* w+ C! [; P* W9 R
Holmes: I just picked it up.
) S2 U5 J! N1 b1 kWatson: You remember your revolver? （显然没有。）
  M7 a( s! N0 }+ y, ?! {" lHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
/ G' ?7 q* f6 S3 H2 HWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. （吐糟继续。）' I0 m' p' }1 _( f4 w" j+ Q  F
Holmes: You did.! k8 }) k+ Z! o3 D" s9 X
（注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子，吐糟。）; ^- R7 c  j+ N$ f# C5 }2 C
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.6 t) b5 L1 l$ E; q' |) V1 n
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7 Q0 T# o8 t: W3 Z* k& G+ [0 B- l宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器（该不会因为Watson的新欢吧），枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。Watson敲Holmes的房门。* R2 b1 \) R2 x3 b
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
! y- n/ q* O+ p1 JHolmes: Granted.2 @; i: k, L% x" y; j" \0 S
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) r7 k0 V. L" z$ C晚餐桌上，吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻（女性）后。5 B) I' d) r: B$ c
Watson: Well done, old boy. （潜台词：very mature。）
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拳击场那段（Holmes启动Combo Strike之前）的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”，是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。! s  X% h& @0 r2 b. _( V$ _8 ]% J" d
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Watson带Holmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作，发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。0 V# t% S! U0 ?  L* @
Watson: And what happens if I do this? （掀开瓶子，用手杖敲了敲，把虫子全放跑了。）
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Holmes去见Blackwood时，Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的（好吧，信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的）《约翰默示录》的一章，《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene（就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼）带着Moriarty（莫利亚蒂教授，福尔摩斯系列的最终boss）的委托来见Holmes。
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5 L# P+ f) A0 h1 h2 U, O# jIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
: t+ ]/ g3 C: u  Q& DHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? （这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。）
3 s' }. e5 u- D4 J, k; @5 qIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开，Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场，玩儿命吐糟仰慕Irene的Holmes，建议Holmes远离麻烦（leave the case alone）。$ C/ y. ?% L' f+ C9 g  f. E0 `. z
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. （醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。）
# s& m4 Y1 ?& F: a( x1 G5 EWatson: Get that out of my face.
# {: g5 m8 r2 b6 sHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand., B  D* N! i+ f% v- G) f- Q
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
+ i& z* p) [3 I/ u! [( t& T1 U, K路人警官Clarky上场。
- p3 o$ ~  j; RClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
) c' F. l* M: M" W1 ^7 s- j" t8 ~Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. （面对伦敦警察，一种智力的优越感油然而生。）& g& f* X- L; }0 C# \) i$ l7 {( @* @
得知Blackwood死而复活后，Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
: K. ~: W. S9 tWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
2 h# W8 |+ T/ jHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后，Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场，诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母，Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
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4 U1 |# F- |, E# ^" s$ }* }Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
+ ^9 o8 h( T( e* G5 LWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. （我们管这叫傲娇。）
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河边屠宰场，Blackwood装13地出场后。9 o* V9 X* j( ]
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. （吐糟。）8 i) F" K" q' d6 H& d1 u
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
* Y7 u% A" C5 P1 V( M  N: sWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. （再吐。）
" y/ t) G% E4 O+ \- T' g' G死亡机器开动，火焰包围了Sherck和Irene。
! ?" g# E! k! vHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson （其实快被烤焦了。）
# w" x8 x# X& f$ ]后来解Watson的皮带（挂在链子上增大阻力）。( {5 W( d. F4 e. {
Holmes: Don’t get excited. （汗。）* g1 E% {; X) t' x* o
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes，看到地上推理用的画符（顺便说一句，那作案顺序实在太古典了）。
: t3 j6 V  z# RLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了，因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后，才有了新笑点。对了，决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。2 ^, Z' g- V! L
话说Watson和未婚妻Mary向Holmes道别，发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。7 N& G* v9 P1 A
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. （吐糟Watson）But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. （暗示Watson放他下来。）Good afternoon, dear. （向Mary问好。）
3 z1 ]0 c1 w! u3 [0 ]! \Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. （淡定。）) X9 ~, c! M1 [% n/ c" X* ~0 b7 S9 n
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. （再次暗示Watson放他下来。）3 \) X6 I9 Q) S: S* c
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?4 p6 L6 j, E5 j8 K7 X8 N' W
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. （淡定。）3 p- I1 t& N% c0 m* H: ^7 [* ~! n+ ~
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? （开始求饶。）( _$ q" Q! Y: d) @5 l( Y5 n+ L
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? （这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。）; }9 z5 g4 M/ C
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. （看来真的挺不住了。）6 R# v4 C2 d/ B, E( L0 F% B4 M
Watson: Worse things have happened. （得理不饶人。）! Q! g  C9 r( v% F; R+ @2 x! K, w
Mary: John. （未婚妻看不下去了。）
* [, Y1 X4 Z1 e, `$ S! ^（Watson把Holmes放了下来。）
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总之，这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson，一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty，暗示大家还会有第二部，第三部……