《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。（比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。）在这个故事里，没头脑是Holmes，不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay。
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影片开头，Holmes启动Combo发大招，从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的Shrelock和Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。) }% p! ?  z& Q8 n2 f  f  J! w
Watson: I like the hat. （吐糟开始。）
$ }3 p2 E* |4 ^8 s' f$ yHolmes: I just picked it up.3 y5 ~% y: s. H
Watson: You remember your revolver? （显然没有。）
+ _8 n' h  C" n8 w& T) m/ A; hHolmes: Knew I forgot something.1 e! m2 ~$ d, R8 H  j
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. （吐糟继续。）
0 J: |' i" Z; v! v# j! \, V; tHolmes: You did.) F/ b) `7 [1 `0 d0 n( b$ ~
（注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子，吐糟。）! _4 @5 M* _' v" V4 i/ I* k1 C
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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( I4 N: L( \' F$ t7 f; r6 H6 n宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器（该不会因为Watson的新欢吧），枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。Watson敲Holmes的房门。
) n3 t* S! W  b% r; dWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
! |* J: n* |# F  T, G8 i! S$ U/ JHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上，吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻（女性）后。& U$ v3 U% J* _& R' `3 G6 X
Watson: Well done, old boy. （潜台词：very mature。）
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拳击场那段（Holmes启动Combo Strike之前）的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”，是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带Holmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作，发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。4 q; S. u5 y7 T" ^# W+ J
Watson: And what happens if I do this? （掀开瓶子，用手杖敲了敲，把虫子全放跑了。）
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Holmes去见Blackwood时，Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的（好吧，信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的）《约翰默示录》的一章，《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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/ \5 e& h3 ^# s) v( C& X0 j  rBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。0 x" V, U  f2 W/ R8 `7 H  G4 Y; s5 f
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Irene（就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼）带着Moriarty（莫利亚蒂教授，福尔摩斯系列的最终boss）的委托来见Holmes。
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. P" j& V& O# ?3 t/ VIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
% n/ E7 L( F) _7 ?6 THolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? （这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。）
- ?# Y7 Y: q8 G1 ?' F/ L) SIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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' O- @7 _" V/ J) eIrene离开，Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场，玩儿命吐糟仰慕Irene的Holmes，建议Holmes远离麻烦（leave the case alone）。
0 ?; N3 d1 ^( {  BHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. （醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。）( z0 j" }' X/ m8 l* j5 L) Y
Watson: Get that out of my face.
$ z: }- X9 J, Q1 k7 W  Z2 o9 KHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
: E- ^$ j5 w7 Y7 k) c) YWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.0 [9 w: g- f: x2 v
路人警官Clarky上场。2 x  D- g6 e' f+ S
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
* W4 O3 _1 a- b7 K3 A% yHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. （面对伦敦警察，一种智力的优越感油然而生。）) D- s( t3 g, R: Z: h% r
得知Blackwood死而复活后，Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
% U- X' D( ]# k. W  M; A# g& A8 [Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?: H# X3 D& ~, w" n5 V( ^
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not." x2 \& G% b" l1 j; |8 x
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墓地勘查后，Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场，诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母，Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
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Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely., a: f" S* F% [( e( [1 d4 J
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. （我们管这叫傲娇。）, b% I4 d6 k( E. S: X4 F1 J
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- u1 n2 G+ t+ H7 ?: O4 d: F河边屠宰场，Blackwood装13地出场后。0 T/ o4 F8 N, \% q* ^+ q/ b( {
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. （吐糟。）
7 e" V) R' W8 HBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…& y0 V/ b  L! y$ ~" L$ I
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. （再吐。）
  _9 g) O' o) }* u死亡机器开动，火焰包围了Sherck和Irene。
8 I: R/ E( M6 UHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson （其实快被烤焦了。）& A. r/ `% N- V/ t( \% N" }3 P0 Y% G
后来解Watson的皮带（挂在链子上增大阻力）。/ f6 p! F' L2 n$ H
Holmes: Don’t get excited. （汗。）6 T/ X$ G6 I- E" x$ L8 E, C
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes，看到地上推理用的画符（顺便说一句，那作案顺序实在太古典了）。
; N% j4 e% }8 y; Q) uLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.0 O8 C" b2 a: X
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接下来的吐糟点不多了，因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后，才有了新笑点。对了，决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
: V3 D. m# }* y话说Watson和未婚妻Mary向Holmes道别，发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
2 r4 X# K  h+ tHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. （吐糟Watson）But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. （暗示Watson放他下来。）Good afternoon, dear. （向Mary问好。）
2 x! G; C3 _/ G- I) UWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. （淡定。）4 L/ z1 J8 ?$ t  F9 j4 w, z* `
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. （再次暗示Watson放他下来。）
; N: t$ M$ o! vMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?& A* E3 ~9 i& V% U  Z& o+ J
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. （淡定。）" l/ @* p2 [' d2 g
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? （开始求饶。）
+ E9 Y6 @& D" Z' GWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? （这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。）
- \3 V8 {2 u0 r6 _6 e2 THolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. （看来真的挺不住了。）5 a5 l7 v& k3 m& T: ]
Watson: Worse things have happened. （得理不饶人。）
% F, t5 _; [7 V: |Mary: John. （未婚妻看不下去了。）9 B4 p' @8 i/ F2 g- k. a' r( c/ c
（Watson把Holmes放了下来。）
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% R  `5 ?- S9 N# U( b总之，这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson，一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty，暗示大家还会有第二部，第三部……