 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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$ i w, M: g( Z4 ~ e影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
/ v9 Y7 ^, M5 L5 k: c: tWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) ( \- O* X$ l9 @1 b( G
Holmes: I just picked it up.; e! i5 U$ R/ P; l& m7 s
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) & B, {' h* H" K7 ~7 g
Holmes: Knew I forgot something." \9 h( K" Y; V' ?7 q
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) " P+ D1 E1 d9 |$ R" ]5 p
Holmes: You did.3 m5 Y6 g8 f& E% |$ ~9 R
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) # T5 U4 Y6 @7 ]/ e( Q
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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8 {/ e. _4 ~- o6 b宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
. G; L5 I4 O, y" h! W1 f( oWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
1 _' B: y( z9 b6 L9 \Holmes: Granted.& C. B4 ?8 U6 S$ O) g' K4 g
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
& k, T: d+ q8 C6 s. g' j! P) FWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 6 S' O. r: Q/ ]% q9 l' ?
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" j. f2 D$ v* D) x1 @; r% ? z拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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8 y( ~9 ? i sWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 / [ P" T. f3 t9 d3 \
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) # q6 A, A8 B: E5 u
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 1 L; x0 ^, O3 B9 y7 p% k
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9 h2 M X% |: B# p/ |Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
X5 g0 V& Q/ h8 r( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
* |1 q6 E5 Q1 y! c3 W- uIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?9 ~/ A1 [( u- ~; V: i! q
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
0 x5 j- ~* l4 _Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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1 W* J9 d I0 g( v" aIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
9 E2 X* F+ z" g4 p, m$ z. tHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
* }/ F8 E' I. G. K, [, k& {$ ?Watson: Get that out of my face.% T D2 Y- b1 w8 H5 p4 o
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.7 @7 Z, {& b5 t g3 q/ H/ [
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
! V' [4 { j T9 {路人警官 Clarky上场。
% H$ H; b# x3 H& n, {1 FClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.* U, U% h; e6 Y) m7 v" x; S
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) ; x. P1 A v. z. V4 t0 h6 f
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 $ P4 |$ ^0 H, b2 ^
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
& m4 _/ e! F7 {/ h' NHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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, g' [. V. }2 _. P( B7 s7 ]$ e8 L墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 $ n) c# z% S# w* T) H6 `
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) , W4 O9 A8 u2 L! x# q9 _2 {2 w3 y
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.) l' }: W+ v. L6 }$ V
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
. o4 K5 {$ y/ |! i, _# m6 tHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
* B5 \- k6 }% TBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
# q6 \2 Y+ T' u# YWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
6 S% r7 b. t2 R7 [: z死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 2 J& P* q9 F2 D5 J6 S, F4 q d
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
" x+ M/ I' N1 T; c6 [+ [后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
* G3 [0 g/ Z, d6 oHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) " h- X" F2 f" O* ]8 Z9 ^1 K
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% R. M# U) g$ C) b警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
1 x* z5 f6 T2 O7 h1 jLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.0 a0 R9 J9 A# z
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 ' A/ X5 d* Z# ?4 t2 U
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 3 C1 r9 k# _/ r1 f4 o. ~4 q
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
# N' J4 q& A1 x4 p6 O7 |* O4 I. EWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) * Q! f+ ^, @) b( ], D8 l
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
9 N+ M) A! N9 [Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
& L) D: u2 m9 S1 K; VWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ( i. v( j5 o) T' ?1 Q
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
9 B( f4 e& I: g- z9 A% E% u7 F+ e) E& LWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) $ E! a4 V! Z+ \# z# s! u
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
4 X s! J. ~5 Y+ {- _. YWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
8 D% K/ h; f0 rMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) & z& s: d m& L! V" I3 M, r9 V
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 7 u) l' U* G! K# o
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! y8 i9 E$ Z. K! l总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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