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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay) {& _' i' r* \9 ]- n) l. z
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。
  N$ v5 O/ y* Z+ V9 qWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
7 S4 q( A: G* Z& k9 n. `- \Holmes: I just picked it up.  Q- P0 j/ V% \3 ~
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
, q, [! j$ R7 x2 PHolmes: Knew I forgot something.$ b" d9 K# E7 y$ i7 F  }
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
! J) ]7 a7 D0 M: f7 g) }7 XHolmes: You did.
9 p# K/ v2 q9 s+ d3 y  h- C# ?4 ]* k(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
6 H6 k& ]* R& e3 s; p* RHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.6 q# T" a$ X) i5 _
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# ?; i. F  x" Q6 P/ G宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。7 p0 W# u& X! j9 J; P
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.3 w2 t9 s2 ^) }. E+ W% Z- o  c5 W
Holmes: Granted.
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+ m4 d; U* M2 i, x# B. [晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
) Q/ i1 x! D4 a4 _: z% u+ oWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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1 B2 F7 x( Z2 o1 M. h& F. O' g  n拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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  i( Y' L1 r# dWatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
) N" q( m. w: A- f0 s1 z- [3 g# iWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)8 a7 ~" w9 F/ D' x( c& T/ b6 }
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7 N/ p# H7 `+ G* C1 N5 ^! |2 \- ]& [Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。
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, L8 M9 r1 y+ C) M: c. e+ gBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes
  H2 C: i9 ^2 N7 YIrene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措)
: C+ i1 z0 j% f; y& eIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?' i/ J7 j' }1 l2 N/ r1 ]
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。)3 k$ A5 H. p- s3 O
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.4 d4 W. ]9 Q. L  R  O/ e5 T+ t
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。
9 P- E! [! M# {! K( aHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)
5 Q" J5 T" h9 BWatson: Get that out of my face., u8 {; h( h. ]% h
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
8 f* f& B. F5 v' }7 jWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
8 M9 k) @4 {4 E6 @路人警官Clarky上场。
$ ?9 S" t3 h" D0 ~Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
2 O  G8 }! R) f2 G4 LHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)9 ^: r+ W% [# Z, o3 h
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
, J) K9 S) L7 M; d, K# d9 ]5 RWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?: S! A. w: P+ h0 \/ N5 h
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
8 ~- r5 v( e. E/ g3 Q' X! W/ ZWatson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。)% P! Q# e6 _4 P8 W
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
4 \" N8 ^; Q3 l8 F2 cWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)7 O0 L: R& A6 }# q0 S& c
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。1 J2 ^  I, C; a% A1 D; t8 g1 X4 ~
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
2 f$ x3 W- f* @/ W" G+ CBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…. I3 w4 G# j2 m; f/ W  ^+ @& h
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)1 _5 @7 A+ m9 e) a: u0 b( }
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene7 b$ g( s/ S* @! c7 [) L
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
% q) x. f' F' L5 w后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
7 `9 u  p# m# Y/ d% b5 \: _3 Q. `' V4 ?Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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. k% p. m, V9 ?" }' t; ~; j警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。' f# V9 x) S" o2 _2 Q4 b% h6 N
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.' C5 `) `+ \0 o# v; S* R+ }) b
13.
! H' ]+ n5 g0 K% U1 u接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
$ E) ^0 q4 r# u2 }9 G( X话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
6 x6 J) ]) k: J2 P6 g' ]& m, ]Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)
/ l+ z2 f! J9 f) [* t6 K2 L$ jWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
; t+ _3 N: k4 C6 C4 z* CHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)7 B: s. A+ ~. W7 C# A
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
; x& B8 ^& g* Z, X, X; KWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
% z' W5 N, `& U( gHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)0 e, S! Y7 S- [! c4 g
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)( W3 z) P; ~5 H  a1 B  Q
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
' D3 f" h5 C. oWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
  ~. |4 K! w: S& O4 cMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)9 [( F6 C* }: P( G& [$ }: @
WatsonHolmes放了下来。), p) Z% r8 Q0 K, S# G0 f+ f
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总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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