 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ! x- D7 R4 o+ z
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
: n/ _3 Z( P# d5 }2 K+ L$ \: V# DWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) - |/ v$ z" ~1 o# r. O& l- L
Holmes: I just picked it up.
8 z9 V D8 [7 M9 Q; x! x4 ]; ~5 mWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
4 K' E2 M9 g# w9 _3 Y2 q4 {Holmes: Knew I forgot something.' ]6 O, a$ d( {) J2 I) M0 \
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 5 Y' Q& x7 t* j
Holmes: You did.* R" R) f1 X/ O0 n, [; ]
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
* i- ?- V) H S9 |Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.+ Z5 |( l/ R. N ?
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 # P1 ^6 B* N4 p/ X0 R- N5 k
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
& X$ j5 c% L! R7 U/ N. z+ FHolmes: Granted.' {- j' G. Z/ D+ E
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3 h1 o8 u2 J7 t, j, ^晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 % a8 U T/ |/ ^% g# S, B
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) ' W+ U6 z- A( D, g5 ?
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* P& M, G% L0 v& V) R9 @. n拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 6 r" u2 i7 I$ Z0 }. b4 T" L
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 % }% N5 x* `' q0 o
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0 _9 n: ]6 A cBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 ; F3 N7 m- b0 Y% X- v/ B# K5 Z
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
1 ]* v9 ?+ O# J( G& p5 X4 B2 i( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ! v( Y, R2 j# ?, e
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
" ^0 ]" z( d) Z; X3 J0 k6 tHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
% Z! a, w5 m. r" d \Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.; b* {: o% T- n8 f
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" O/ v) n1 K7 |, g3 `' gIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 , Q7 E$ a/ R9 R9 d; `# z% f
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
3 i4 g/ Z5 Q" b9 _. P/ P m+ ]! YWatson: Get that out of my face.( M% W0 C+ A' l; b4 }
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
. o- S$ F* g$ C0 yWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
4 }! F5 C: k) p: t路人警官 Clarky上场。
; r" e" g4 Q, Q3 @Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
" o1 l, P/ p! z4 h3 lHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
& \" k# c! ]2 _, ?# a得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 " S* e" T: b1 B$ v8 r
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
0 T3 t8 V% w2 G h7 G; [Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 1 f; D' b9 U/ [/ j1 u) F% Z; w
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 0 `# ~% ?% F8 I5 r
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
1 \+ J. u% h) y X' y4 y5 f4 eWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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$ T5 v N% }1 B, b" Y: o! F. X河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 7 I5 [! Z/ K# J+ Z9 }% n' @1 y
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
. t2 x, E1 G" l4 [. BBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
2 V# A- `6 g. XWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) & z' z' a5 g+ V% C
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
2 e; M7 o! j! DHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) ( ~ |, c& Y1 \8 M# k
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
4 N/ _) i' q) Y0 a4 M4 dHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) r" e) r9 _* n2 X. l" [4 I
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F( f1 z# g( Q% ]) {$ N$ W警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
5 y) `) t1 a5 s: Z! _Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.! @- _, k- F9 N5 k3 |: y7 t$ I) ]
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5 M2 {6 R' U/ R. X$ J- B% d& U6 g接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 - k# u) I4 h& Q9 ?8 G3 b9 J% F* e
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 / n7 r" `7 B7 p/ P( m/ h7 K
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
# t# q$ K3 s, R) f7 Y8 VWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) + n: r2 l0 d, T C% O
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) 5 j! g/ |+ P) j, \" t# x
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?* o2 r# B0 X; O, R- }0 T9 m7 ?
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) 1 f; ]) u3 f$ \1 o% `
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) ; z: }1 O2 O5 X, n# E
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
$ b. C5 q8 F+ `4 t+ VHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) - m( {$ C# |3 Z
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) : {# t" k( h# M- s0 l
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
! p/ l" T. Q) @( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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