 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 # F. X V- M6 I, l+ M) U) n
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 1 s, A' o8 ~2 w
Holmes: I just picked it up.* y; Y6 u, f q) M
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
1 j* {8 |& L3 ^' S/ W' ZHolmes: Knew I forgot something.- d% k/ C* C4 e$ ~7 d. y! x
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) - V: ^. s0 @9 f+ t6 h
Holmes: You did.6 T1 }8 W4 z( c
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
- _; Y! i j8 y# `. w: n$ aHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
1 F6 h( u9 z2 q' y7 S( jWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
$ b0 u8 G. E2 i8 P. aHolmes: Granted.
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2 A8 x; d4 }% K6 @, h晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 + d& O+ l+ E" g$ ~
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) % j5 r$ M% o3 T1 \6 |
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 + N; }' C3 h' T9 w0 a
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3 }1 ?0 |5 d( F1 ~: fWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
2 T+ K! H' z: w! J0 v, FWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) ( A! z7 z1 Q( e* Z+ x
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; D0 ?, x: K% |0 Q9 W: NHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 7 ^! o1 K0 g: H# M1 {
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) H( \3 ?$ t! VIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
/ {- {% a+ A: S" l6 o2 F( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
6 E( @' h4 F! k6 KIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
& I2 K ?3 e2 @" j" P1 PHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
8 T% I4 R! u5 _; qIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.* r9 v3 \& m: G8 e
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 1 Y8 R$ h, r8 Z/ `1 L
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) 2 Z( n* k; M" B& W0 I: Z7 X( z4 {+ w6 @
Watson: Get that out of my face.
* A, v) c# ]$ f+ a, W; ? sHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.* Z6 e9 Q3 H' R$ ?5 J
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.1 u) K. L. Y, F
路人警官 Clarky上场。
( s) ?1 d0 Z" k p4 i3 }/ PClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.8 H" H/ k( |) f' R ^# Z# e( i
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) . ~3 Z* |5 q8 ]6 K3 {7 W* L2 t- o% U
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 # q) `8 O y6 x0 q" Q6 o
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?, @" {2 v/ L( c: f9 ~ ~
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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4 K; h" P" r, F6 Q墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 % }& h0 z- U& k, ]
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
: I5 r* \" i" JHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.$ G3 |( i# ~! V: O' S8 U) k4 d
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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; q. r+ N0 ?9 g/ n# @河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
# S9 O# ^6 ?: hHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
) W0 o1 }# P2 l1 P5 }+ j5 \Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…7 M! j; [; q3 w! t# Z$ ^2 S
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
% ~) i/ k) z- X9 ]- _" X/ C t) J- N死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
; P3 q: u, o0 k0 h: ]$ I" \( cHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) ! h4 v( B. y) \
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
$ F9 s! U0 u3 n- DHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) - ~: A' D* Z. r6 d- a
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6 `9 g' n0 y; _警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 % ^2 E, c1 P, F% j
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
. r2 E) f% _. d话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
( O9 E, ]! l- f( J8 c7 UHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) ( U% Z% i$ E) l+ e; @/ z4 {
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 3 d3 A4 {% n* ~0 X
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) * {& @( U z# ^ s4 _# G) Y
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
: e# v C: A- t/ q1 zWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
+ i6 L' d# x, L+ [Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
, U5 N/ {, G" R' F; tWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
I" y, W8 p THolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
1 C, \# D) z; \( t# B4 N$ p8 KWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) ( s/ ^0 L% S+ C H" s3 A% j
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) " N) J( |# z/ D: f
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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7 V Y! Y2 C# v+ ~2 r6 Z总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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