 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 # G9 N1 n5 g7 v3 `) b
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2 O6 H0 q+ }$ V# J! ?2 t8 H影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
3 i1 j9 `0 b. F* C, YWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) & u' u1 p7 h8 N" J3 U+ G1 |
Holmes: I just picked it up.
( W" \( P7 m/ \2 rWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
6 ~ V; Y' ?/ e- J. tHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
( D, K4 s* i9 C2 i2 ~) ?Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
; W% ?$ M1 c4 @' T" L- o/ T- [; kHolmes: You did.; S8 T+ b2 i, \' w, e S
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) " ?0 J# A5 M5 [, J# k; R9 g7 u
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.1 D" Q) r4 }( t/ O. ~5 {% b
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, ^, Z( y+ M! R" r% Y$ |宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 2 c, a7 I- x0 ]; o0 Y' y2 W
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.' \% R- F( Q' A1 Q6 a& H% c
Holmes: Granted.
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! \, x& n# N0 P( u9 g/ f5 B. N0 h2 _晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
7 X& u% U$ @8 K( J8 }" f7 TWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) " n) ~; q$ @) @. }7 d
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
7 M+ m0 ^4 ~$ T" j3 C8 h3 QWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 4 m. X9 A0 U% p d; G
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 5 w% o9 n2 d- I% r( S5 Y
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5 J8 g6 Z: _2 KBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 / E1 P& [+ G+ R
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5 r/ K, f; s! G9 @Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
M5 J* z( Q9 s. q# k7 R7 l( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 4 @' j1 u7 Y% S, |/ D/ [- X7 G- k
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
; O- u# n0 j9 F% C; \Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
; I F4 A# h. x xIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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( x0 z! |1 B- d+ U0 i$ ?2 `Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 1 S" k5 _ W. k
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) 7 m# z1 `) I1 e: [6 K! V9 `
Watson: Get that out of my face.9 J" ~, H2 ^) w G
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.0 g( P/ n y9 w M8 @0 Z
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
, Z5 P( X& w. H. V5 R5 a9 ?- F路人警官 Clarky上场。
$ Y/ a, x3 w( i$ ?4 c" q+ wClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.2 f. c2 z: K8 R y) D' J" i' @
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 1 N& J; p E0 H a0 g
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 ! M! b9 F) O% n# Y& M5 m2 T
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?' x) }2 y. F4 Q" I2 ^
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.: I8 j2 U H [" r. C
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
% u* b. r7 p' D# s" J( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
+ S9 X: G) J$ i5 t! |5 ?Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.9 y5 C8 u: t8 ^
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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1 s/ Z6 l& b5 H* k% k6 ?河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 2 w6 ]8 N2 ^7 o' {& B
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) - d/ F8 O# U! u4 e& J5 [4 S* j
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
, e: S ]2 N7 u, C: R' L$ i" eWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) # V8 s: a, U# d& O! W4 \
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 . R. e) n9 C: I) Y+ D
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) # i) b1 o3 V' h# W
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
" l M" L2 W9 n( X" E+ i9 _Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) ) v. g0 w' V' ~8 C" T S, S X( k
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6 t9 J9 Y1 w& [& D警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 2 k* Z1 w. f3 ] I3 t# q1 ?
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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- E# U# i" H! H接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 / n' u, r% w% d5 A
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
0 E7 \7 r) |" G0 ^Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
# u7 I& c. v0 `; u* b; Y+ Q" i! EWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
3 w8 \% |5 e3 D* c K+ UHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) ( `" K: S7 [* k C/ H
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?) }. V0 o x' n" `9 b. |* P
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ' I' s# l/ y, X& F
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) . Q$ c9 B) ~; @# y8 c
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 3 j$ S1 c2 X/ i( ^9 ?$ o
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
* \+ W0 I5 Z9 N, U. W& dWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
h) V5 d9 V D0 n3 {Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
% n+ Y/ D6 u- T6 U' e* W8 v" O( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) ' n- a: V; h5 u; J1 v1 J4 v+ c- e
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4 A3 g7 D5 @4 o+ _" m0 k" T总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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