 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 & a7 V( n$ X* E! h9 @ R
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% E1 O. e9 W' x' ?$ I+ F1 t影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 1 e# l4 w' u. B4 k# o
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
+ ^5 z" a9 R* ~6 A0 rHolmes: I just picked it up.
' y- q k0 v) C! QWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
7 c2 z# I6 W& N$ V: eHolmes: Knew I forgot something., \, V% |8 r0 n x' w( y$ F7 j; E9 [
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) + [' J x3 N/ ]4 O0 l
Holmes: You did.
" |" ^2 U% [$ u" M(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
( N+ \: Q2 w g0 `$ aHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
0 }" |1 n* X2 T1 D7 P: p8 LWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
! A; p/ J$ N/ E: mHolmes: Granted.
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. Y5 E: k( R; N4 v晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 0 q2 T O. i% D% O
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) - n8 R3 S- s. N, k# v
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 ' H$ F- K1 p0 @& ^- y- }$ ]5 N
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: A" X" D4 Y0 z9 M) N( s+ CWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
8 D; h1 T7 U5 ?- K* E( CWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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' H. s1 ^! T Y4 c8 CHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 + J3 w$ F$ P, a2 R3 K
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
7 t5 W' M8 R7 i, @' {Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?: p N: S" H- i
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) ' a9 u8 Q: R# Z% T* }
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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" J! }+ z; @9 ]6 N; |3 g" G2 EIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
* b1 ~# U3 C: r3 v' D6 }; aHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
# U) ^3 P/ X% E) YWatson: Get that out of my face.
; w, y4 l9 W0 \Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand., l' A7 E5 Q& v m) ?( e7 C
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.1 X* N% E* H0 s
路人警官 Clarky上场。
( @# r; T9 d8 `Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
. ]: p7 \6 q1 Y" O! M( J! N4 AHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 0 ~8 d: _0 L" A2 R' k- U- @( F2 ?$ ?0 T
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
+ u' \# o* t7 R8 OWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
( o4 K6 N5 x" F2 Z, d, b; wHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.- u( i* b0 K6 s+ c h$ C$ I9 f' q3 z' W
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- r' E1 i# O. q: ]0 \墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
: _6 H# A1 h) U9 Y6 Q( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 9 a5 F( v0 w) T& Y
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.2 A/ x3 D' u. H! e+ E4 P8 L$ r
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) ! o7 ^- W) c9 p5 r
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 - k7 Y( U) B1 v$ B/ w
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
# y( S/ W% F) L6 \5 w% k+ l) |Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…% P0 Q9 Q& i" J6 v/ o; C
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
6 t, I+ ~3 v- H% B死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
: H: l \+ y: kHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
7 _" @9 E, b. f; A- _后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 2 l" l2 }* `7 d2 u: m* G. V; i
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 6 ?* ?0 L' s2 b1 [' t: y( b
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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7 p0 l. w' V9 S( d; T7 A+ G接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 ' O7 p" d" y' p7 i P
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 ! J; `8 ]9 |2 f' `0 F8 M
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) i$ D- M7 s4 i4 a; {7 @# J
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
% q& g; E8 W' }3 v9 [Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
, t& T$ ^3 V3 q& y% v/ M8 _% H5 i8 eMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?3 e. v$ h, C( B$ M# \8 ]3 ?
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) , [1 S$ c1 ^1 ], F) H1 X) R
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
7 ~& k: W8 \2 m b; JWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
/ x4 C8 f9 u) u: HHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
4 j/ c9 T. u" q( eWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) h( t& q/ ~3 e- d [( ?/ F
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) * ~. P F5 ?! L: h8 }
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) , ^( z u* E! S) y; |6 w8 `* {7 s
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# {+ ?2 i4 I- l: c, Q7 }$ m6 X/ W总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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