 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 9 {7 Y- d: R( `7 T
***********
" u3 y- J: W) u. F$ q9 Y1. # V! f5 ~2 G! v5 {, F, ]% S5 F
影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
/ d* k0 O3 f9 I' T( B/ X4 mWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) ' k+ @/ k8 N# U" w- m
Holmes: I just picked it up.4 z$ P6 V: d9 J1 ~6 ~
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
& A- ?& T5 ^0 ?! `$ w2 q q6 XHolmes: Knew I forgot something.% w1 i' B* x$ v( f
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
4 Y( A3 c- B% {! \$ sHolmes: You did.
- \3 @3 |3 [' A# [! x(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 9 V6 [4 @, a7 i: I6 J4 m" b
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
9 `" a1 i! V3 n2 e1 C* u2. 7 K5 {1 E) m" [) [* }' V
宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
5 W1 ], k* \6 O1 `5 V$ [Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
, l2 q( o1 Y, f2 q; J4 I0 t4 UHolmes: Granted. Z% l8 d0 s4 a. L0 G* b
3.
' g9 u, K0 d f" m' M) `* G晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ' h% j, F: _/ A/ \
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
4 Y# k9 d! P" { ^4. Y3 L& w& d7 X0 i4 {
拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 3 ]& K1 g3 d. g4 _, k
5.
# c2 [4 ]4 d$ g ]& S- g; KWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
- B/ ~( b% P# G$ e$ v- ~Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) ' C/ g9 ]) _8 C7 l G# G( h0 W
6. . ?/ Q5 F- z }# {$ s, M/ [2 q
Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 3 i# `; z$ B: V
7.
( t" w: @. m! x' ]4 _& wBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
|- G/ j3 J( |- [8.
7 c3 S6 _4 F. W4 R; |. O- ` rIrene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 - Z% B0 F/ @( i; b
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
; Y& O7 i V: J+ \6 wIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
$ o% H: b* h! X* bHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) # H" \ i+ T8 T* |3 D+ n( p7 Y3 e
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.! w/ s9 U2 n, ~. T
9. + L4 M# A% X# k M" \ w3 d1 X3 \
Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
5 X, o9 }, z% G% R5 nHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
' j6 H3 V% [ qWatson: Get that out of my face. J8 D) v% N& D
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
' Q3 b+ z& V+ R- I& I- G0 V0 w4 Q7 RWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
* K2 ~. ~" ]' E4 x/ w路人警官 Clarky上场。 ! T) {! @. R8 T: F2 d$ w
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.1 K4 `) f3 v7 n
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
4 A2 ~) k+ b: a& P6 D得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
2 b6 Q. Z3 b& T1 R9 GWatson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?; D: Z/ O5 G. `: h; k# b3 L
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
0 U' m" b2 [+ B# ?8 p. x10.* \$ E9 _3 ~9 e i4 U
墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
! q% N2 g# d/ t1 e( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) & o2 {. h0 X8 ^; i- N
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
3 F( r3 x7 T6 u/ i: U1 [6 UWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 3 ?: f4 P8 u& o6 Y
11. | C; Q+ U! f1 }( {
河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
% }8 o" a( Z, XHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
4 G' H) X% x$ P' S1 t/ nBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…3 d/ z- I( K& P* Y& ~
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) * R7 `3 p T/ D$ E% e) a) h: x0 R
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 7 n* N1 q, H8 G7 K
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) : u1 d; X! c- m0 p
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 " C5 v# z/ t* T( S4 u/ X
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
' ^' R. ~ a p+ p12.
6 r- l+ `5 N1 o4 J$ }7 N+ Q; S警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
) N1 n$ P1 l0 |. e kLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.9 Y, A; {; R5 z* n- q# p6 y
13.
# f, T" H+ G. h( L: G接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
H* c+ g: F( R5 s# P1 ~' T话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
. R3 m4 _: g! `$ H/ {: q9 f$ ~3 @ j6 g; XHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 7 _- o( Z* g5 R: k. z2 z
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) $ [! v/ ^+ r+ e5 O3 h t
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) $ Z# x7 ]" ?& V
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
% s+ a5 a* ^1 F6 }2 mWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ; h2 V9 x1 z" m2 p0 _ D( k
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
5 f4 V# c! E3 y0 dWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
C" E$ G8 I* B: O& X1 gHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
: h& j C% e3 S9 U# w% cWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) " a$ {, N+ D1 J, ~. [
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
& q: }! y' J# J9 d$ r% o! l% r( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
6 ]& z: U0 S' j& T2 a***********
* V, {+ [7 H& w, S总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
| |  | |  |
|
|