 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 8 y h( Z$ V: v
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1.
5 m/ V+ z3 @, J影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
2 [" V k/ T1 t9 d! P/ TWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) ?- b+ ~1 X9 x/ ^6 X8 z8 w
Holmes: I just picked it up.# ^& B' ^8 j! r( u
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 8 s7 r8 e& z1 L8 I; ?% H
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.- K9 V. O v% X5 w$ E
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 8 \8 A" R, Q8 k2 H4 v
Holmes: You did.! r8 ?' \: s, C3 E* k
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) & f6 W3 ]/ G* ?- v5 M
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.% R/ K% ~9 y: p& S- E9 _- \ Y F. a
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
: A5 D. T6 y& q/ x& rWatson: Permission to enter the armory.
# D% ~- ?& T3 t+ R7 q/ VHolmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 M3 l( T5 {1 R) E; z8 j
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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! @. S* Q& Q5 H2 e7 W1 A; f# t0 \拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 6 f' o5 ~+ a. k2 V7 a1 j4 S* l
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
% ?! B# j# G j" B, N; aWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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8 d1 ]7 k9 {* ] I) F+ O2 GHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
1 M7 W5 y. @, T% |5 m* S( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) ( J$ z% L) P6 |+ \0 }; }0 X* }8 Z
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
6 e6 y/ T) h) ~; ]5 _1 tHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
) g' a0 v# z4 M/ |Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.; a0 i$ o0 d" I0 q
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 2 ?) C5 |, ^/ b- i( t" e7 D0 h
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
, {0 O4 |6 U0 V6 o2 f' R( x* j; jWatson: Get that out of my face.6 \. ?! S8 O, b) m
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.7 x7 c3 v6 K' ?; }' A' R
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.% I* T0 F) f1 F- f
路人警官 Clarky上场。
" K1 m" M/ w7 H6 ~7 T$ N) X9 XClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
/ E8 l! _& a$ O' F2 THolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
. ?' g2 W. v: P5 E9 J$ V; R6 b9 T得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 , ~; y0 u! e2 B2 U2 M1 v
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?# G6 _* S! Y% U& z( e( J
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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3 ^( X+ v/ j! }% r8 t0 @9 Y墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
1 f3 t# {2 a4 l! K1 Y, J( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) $ D5 Z0 M: s- w- S
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
+ t/ Y! |8 D# e" ~+ MWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 8 w' ~; _+ w0 Z M7 r$ C1 f
11.
4 r! i" l9 N% k3 f3 D: s河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
4 s- p! k( r7 F7 f$ F, U/ W0 G! y oHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 1 q ]5 P: _! Z$ ?3 |# _) F
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…2 j2 X* g; b5 B1 ~4 B# M
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
0 U6 [4 y5 a, [: v q+ ~! X3 W死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 9 K2 q: U) j& T
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) * }- `% ], ^5 u$ p
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
- I6 B7 w* q) X# D. f: [2 V4 {Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
$ I" ?+ L! A g+ R7 i+ s6 ~2 oLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 ' G6 \; D3 W" D$ i: c
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 * g; f7 {. I R9 H
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 3 J& Y; I5 \7 D' s& q' v
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
$ e+ Z5 U) z8 V8 I8 K9 WHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
. e8 r2 S0 k: j, LMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?/ L' R2 n. c! ?* a; A1 G
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) * O8 y( a' v, O
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) % u4 K( D# j, s. V$ c$ ]: h$ a
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
3 H6 w* d0 y2 O. m& \* G+ i' hHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
9 K0 ~4 m; z2 s, i( lWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
" W8 ~- [9 L4 A9 X$ }( z8 XMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
- [# r- J) [+ M9 ~- L" B( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) # V Q7 G p( s0 h& o; x
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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