 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ! q- T. M. ~9 k( D1 z; P* J
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
7 f* S, C M- p& ]' Q, xWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) / y0 X( T: [! H; v1 q
Holmes: I just picked it up." J4 N5 d9 }; P
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) # a, c+ m* n: H, [' N
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.) O' I- g: d/ k. D* A+ b
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) ' m0 K. S/ F! U1 u
Holmes: You did.
' ]. ` O2 c1 c; k3 x% `(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
4 U5 [8 ^# V% aHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.$ f! C5 @3 d" {* D
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& N7 t+ @9 E. U k# O. }宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ( k. ^0 R" ^5 D* W X' P
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.# o. u& N- X) r4 p
Holmes: Granted.
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; s D( f8 V! }, N' x4 h, Z; o晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
& |& ?" G$ B# G; F4 pWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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, \7 G; f, H. M4 D5 A3 a拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 7 e$ i; g& t9 y; H! q
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" W n/ {1 S0 LWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 $ P/ t8 c% S N5 s
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) & X$ S' G3 Z( t" \
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! A8 \1 D4 _4 b3 ~5 S, dHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 + n8 r- y/ n5 U! f& {
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6 u3 I- z0 ]8 GBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 : w0 s4 w! I" Q* O8 p% m- R: H
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 ) W, y X- S6 Z4 o4 |; ]
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
3 g6 C7 B; t5 m) j* H, m2 ^ F, ^Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
, e' P7 k' W M- oHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) 1 ^0 x. y; }; L7 F
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
, o, {3 T8 E! d% o# ] T2 M5 J7 GHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) o+ w7 C+ h, F0 L N, f8 I/ s: M$ V/ }
Watson: Get that out of my face.. u/ P0 W$ w' F/ n& D G$ }6 C" t$ W
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand./ m! J. v( X1 i8 q
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
- p" u! v5 o) x# [: G" M8 l: R路人警官 Clarky上场。
' x! k- M; u, h$ K# G: b9 eClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.* R4 K8 B( Z% ^0 P5 B3 H. }
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 6 ]; r: H% l! W; N4 u' \3 z
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 0 q: L5 y+ {$ n. K( d! c# p- _, [
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
8 V r9 U0 h5 p* a* o6 AHolmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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1 F! `+ E4 U" e9 E3 |4 r墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
) t/ i( ^4 h$ I: _+ z1 l# J4 |, N( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
- A8 b0 J) u3 v* o/ J. OHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.+ ?6 o1 L5 m! \; ^$ W
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) ! @( V2 D- }* u! \
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3 A9 Z4 \# \ q- v% X: n% C$ N0 W河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
% d! K F/ w0 aHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) # N% k! _1 K; Q* X$ r( \' \
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
7 g2 k0 a' t7 uWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
3 M! \5 i3 i4 }" S死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 ! D5 V; D$ A; h+ n/ M6 q2 D
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
' N" P7 o5 v6 s7 e, m后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 5 @, D) k. R# u) i# G. [& R1 I
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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: O; C1 M) H/ j5 R警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
1 } I) B( C9 }5 c9 P# {Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
_, K/ A7 x" O [% n话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 ) a2 X2 N- \5 k! C+ p9 R! d
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
9 l/ ~, e3 _' G# l. h: v% U& `5 PWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
% r9 }2 A# p6 ]Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) - g. y0 c# B5 v/ _2 t2 @$ H' V: F
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
2 @' P+ ~# a d! Z9 @Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) $ C0 [6 j& d) [9 Z
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) * ]! ~2 P4 R B
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) * P+ n& ?% \7 ?4 O% T6 l
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
4 t/ P- w% U5 F& q+ p- DWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 4 f4 g0 M* ]6 }: `) b/ c6 R5 ^
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
7 G2 `+ o" }3 ^' G" z4 o8 J( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) ; g/ @$ I$ v" r/ B! C7 J
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/ e: k. z) _* P/ G. y7 |3 A7 g2 z总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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