 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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W0 E" Y z4 n影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
1 y% K2 @9 v2 }/ s2 |" IWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 0 X* G0 H B. f$ d% Q$ Y
Holmes: I just picked it up.( j! p5 W6 e1 }# }1 w8 T6 z, P. R
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
! s- l; s+ i T7 S' c% C) P; sHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
4 M* ~/ H5 `9 [Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) # s- v6 j; t* K5 r" D' [
Holmes: You did.
* p( A6 m( o& A$ ?$ G' A(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
. L' G9 Z+ c( E; xHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.& v' ?. X7 q& J; Y+ X7 n
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。
4 L2 Z# {$ {) @Watson: Permission to enter the armory.2 A) q9 z6 z$ R1 ?) s u" S
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
# @2 A* ]8 j$ @( P, ~6 M8 eWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) , h# j8 U$ @# p8 S( m' ~0 W3 `
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 9 M+ }9 M0 s E6 X e& S
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3 q: D1 {1 X1 W; HWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
. Z0 r* s- g/ B& e4 ^- m- t; QWatson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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& g9 z7 Q* p3 I: A& ~Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 $ i. H. v+ Z" V& z3 ]3 R
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; I& q$ ]5 V' b( R+ E/ V/ HBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 1 H% b; Z( C Q
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 * J; d' T- Y3 Z+ y
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 5 t7 R9 ^6 O- E( ~$ u- b8 J
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?% R/ F: M2 B. y+ `+ E
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
& i) l) M$ ?6 _) R( S& y% V8 JIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 " U9 T B y0 e
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
/ a" M' E$ [; G8 W7 N bWatson: Get that out of my face.# p ~( ^; b* j1 O) |$ c5 q
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
; g& Z0 G5 Z# lWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
$ ^; W, E# n3 E- u; R; L路人警官 Clarky上场。 4 H8 l1 S+ F8 S9 F9 M6 l
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.6 O9 @* C& z9 t4 _- o7 J/ T1 a
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
# J3 a, L: D! d$ E) {& U得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 1 S+ L1 m2 j% q" d( A
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?3 m" {. p3 @& X& |" t$ d8 S
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.7 P8 R9 K; B) u2 i8 H) d& r) v
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( K- Y6 `- \7 z- t4 L* k C墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 - q$ |& ~/ {" Q1 C- I! E+ n
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
6 J+ j% ?1 _" R! WHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
) a) G7 b( z% y* MWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
0 @+ r1 y: P0 w1 _: j4 r! VHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) : T" v9 a) d$ i7 z# |0 Q! @; w
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
0 s. y% }0 k* L. h. oWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
; t8 c" {' }& E( w死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
' L8 d% o( [# f! J* ]- ?' }Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
2 q( A. D7 d: L& g后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 + N. j2 y# |; e9 @) M4 D8 `) B
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
( I) e- M# P; Y) i$ k: ZLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
+ I3 x9 c- w. o1 c7 F Z话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 5 |+ b! {3 x: R, k2 s- y
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 7 K2 q8 k5 i1 C/ ?4 h' | t4 ?+ h4 n
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) ' E4 n2 e' h8 E7 ?* Q
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) : s2 _- |, z* @3 _0 v) ^7 I) f
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
' E& t3 ^# ?1 V& _) KWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) & p8 C- i' c6 ~! {. w1 V
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
- v7 y+ u4 N: i; k D1 t" g9 i* u, P: qWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) ' h# V% P8 E4 ~ [
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) ) l* q. X* [+ k5 V( N% i
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) & j% f) G8 D& {( N5 r& v
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
X" _9 L% { h' [( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) 4 L! C1 H4 y/ `2 N4 P$ \9 {
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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