 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 + _/ X$ @$ {; o4 s/ I
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; p# R* A* Z( H0 z. Q影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。
1 }7 |3 y2 w. I/ {8 g% ~Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) 3 b' r3 r1 @. T
Holmes: I just picked it up.! y) F* F) x0 ]% B% |: X
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 3 K: [5 M5 D5 h8 Z, ~
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.: v" p4 O: D. |6 }% K
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
! @9 `0 W* e- `0 S1 T7 o1 FHolmes: You did.
4 A1 D/ s6 Q( q3 P( q(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
6 g. o+ Y# x: P0 S! g$ w/ w4 AHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.3 R0 M: y/ E! o7 s$ h9 o
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宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 & w: Y3 _! }' @1 v
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
) i" e5 z# _- C' J$ y# BHolmes: Granted.9 m6 N$ y. H5 h3 K% O
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
1 g7 D r: A2 Q, n4 ?1 TWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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: g1 C- s) z9 E7 G, ^- t+ q拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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; C# u* w0 {2 Z& T) v' XWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 6 e) V0 b6 A6 O4 p3 u C8 Y
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。) 8 h/ i- k) _, z% H3 X; d1 d$ a
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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+ M4 r5 F6 c' ]# dBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 4 ~: ]4 j: O* x
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
. l# W5 c! H1 e+ R- A( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
0 @3 g/ L' Q+ @% @! P1 Y9 GIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
' s- T. f4 n, |: d! S4 _5 u' XHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
9 e, o1 s; _/ X" E* @: J/ uIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.* X/ Z! C1 l' ]( b4 y# Z
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3 X1 U* T7 Q; p* d- XIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
( u0 N- H- T& {Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ' [2 v2 l) ]. d/ ^* Q l5 a- I3 A( n( I
Watson: Get that out of my face.# F# j k( Q! p7 J
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
& [ k2 D+ S2 X! Y& `5 KWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.7 S5 H9 ?% ~! O- ~5 g* ~; T& ^
路人警官 Clarky上场。
6 G* H# M/ d% E5 U: k) p6 eClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
+ [9 m- `' f+ t6 U( a$ KHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) 0 ]3 b' d o. @. L( O/ r
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 5 m, j6 a7 N# }1 ~7 Z$ K
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?' u. J1 q, E# M( c! Z
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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6 @( b- u3 u) J3 V墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。 4 o) Y' q6 K/ S8 v, H$ F ]2 N
( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) . g. n3 p8 A" Y
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
y3 t) _5 H8 B5 p. ~Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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" ], Z5 Z3 z3 ~) c' ~# c河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 q4 G h" @. x% V$ ?* |- H5 N
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) # \) h1 M/ `* ?2 W1 [3 z+ [7 ?
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
3 g" L2 p% n+ k& y& `Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) $ q1 Z9 j) X0 g7 f0 e1 N
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
9 X$ o! `3 a8 w& H+ DHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) J& T& [) z9 D- h, _+ y
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 ) }2 Z P& t4 G4 N/ e f$ u
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 6 Y+ [8 g$ }$ h
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.7 i1 x$ C) A5 F% f! p" h7 N
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 ) E) w8 l& ^/ J1 E, c, D. @ S
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 " n& ~: p: S M& E' S9 H
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。)
$ n G+ h( P8 bWatson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) ) P. X$ q4 ~/ d5 P' n) P" n
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) ; X( n* O; S% T: x$ A, {: v
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?1 G+ Z1 E2 O; x" `9 q5 T
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) / z$ G2 y1 O6 J0 a
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) - S D" O* a* \6 d. s7 O
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) 6 A2 x# A- E9 \1 ?' N. F* j0 S
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) ! Z/ c% a( E& J8 P$ Q' z/ P# A/ D
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
9 m# ^" E U! n5 n* W FMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
5 p3 P/ L, J7 i4 c, Y _( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) ( W9 G9 { o" A) X. t- ]6 K
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# Y( w) H3 z1 [' h; A8 ?5 B2 V/ g总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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