 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。
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1.
: T, h# ^7 J" t) f; a1 s影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 9 N) ^, R, b5 f B2 y1 ~
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
! N, h6 G+ z# V* `Holmes: I just picked it up.
4 D4 D, Q6 q/ k* }Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
( ]0 b) c: L$ S! _1 J UHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
* I( `- S1 [4 V- `$ EWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。) 5 D( K. `3 s! L' {, A: o
Holmes: You did.! u- [- e# Q# f" z
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
5 W# ~# Y+ j9 R: FHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.+ c" d- M6 q* A5 R2 }( ^! m% r' C' M
2.
# i( X F4 h3 i! v: y+ |2 s3 A宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ) R. Q+ L# B# w& S8 c7 C
Watson: Permission to enter the armory./ i3 z( C, u. a+ E( S/ n* q
Holmes: Granted.6 d" R- i4 E' P7 X0 _
3.
6 t" M7 T% A3 P! O+ X% Y' q; `晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
8 a* I: \4 Y6 I$ a! j7 JWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) 4 {$ L @1 i8 \2 Y; d4 G+ n9 E
4.
$ f2 R' u: N% B7 Y: p3 N' U拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。 " K7 Z: M& o& [) I8 L* d/ T3 H
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。
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5 \% C- f) T# {% b0 h2 KBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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: Z: Q1 r8 V! \" ]8 ^Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 $ k4 B# f2 P! s
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) 0 [& {5 l; s5 e6 p* A, v
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?, p' N3 D/ T2 `6 G9 `
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) . L# }( ]* v1 S2 Y
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.6 l1 E" j( ]9 s' w
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3 T* @$ k3 _7 q1 ]Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
8 \; ]# s6 o, ^Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
+ p8 w; U( r+ R! a6 T. c/ aWatson: Get that out of my face.
% k1 M. G7 q8 B+ K- N0 y+ D _Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
( e0 [/ t( r9 K5 x( KWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
( w# M$ n6 [ @1 x h/ S, N8 l路人警官 Clarky上场。
: p- _' b% s5 n7 NClarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
* x" E5 W( U' Z7 `7 ^$ uHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) |8 ?+ H* B. r1 t- V, @
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
( I+ m* D4 N; a+ v( K2 Q& ]Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?' E+ E& X0 t6 ]: p! n, C
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.! ~0 s$ h' |) B' g3 U9 i9 z
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
; d* k2 w' z4 a& Q( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
7 e) e( o1 B: T7 I; XHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
" B/ s' e7 D2 a# b8 q" [% [/ ?Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
1 H5 Z/ a4 ], \: wHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) 2 K4 P! D8 d4 c) v0 V
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…" _6 Y# g a/ |
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。)
3 y' h6 | N: n; @0 |8 g2 z死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
9 ? Y" [; l) \0 L- K# S' [" R2 BHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
; r) z* X% G/ z D! {# k后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 {( M3 @% N# n3 _
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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" V: c5 w/ B7 w% P; l6 d( y m# P警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 $ v5 p, G$ A- {
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.6 G! Q; A: d1 b$ u- h
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 7 b: f7 \) k+ j! c
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 ( E, w9 I' O, o% s B
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 2 D& o, f) R" R' f
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) * E4 J) E( w, ^
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
) V8 Q% `+ k! h( Y! _Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
+ c- ?( K9 { @2 K) _6 |5 |Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) ' k3 ^: J1 E$ X
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
! b: C. C& h1 i9 o2 p* H0 hWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。) $ \+ ^- ~$ S' M) E0 }- E5 d
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) ) i; d; \# `. _: L5 r& P2 b! |' v
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) : A& C$ J& s& M* h; w& y5 |( M+ B
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) ( R/ j# W6 g5 v* u
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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