 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 . A1 H4 Y- N3 c9 R& K/ t; u4 N1 g
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影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 / X0 w, ~8 I- [8 X
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
& I1 O" `5 N1 Z' s8 n: IHolmes: I just picked it up.3 O3 b$ k8 T8 F: {! C
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) 9 n3 B' b; i, {! h4 b0 |
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
" N1 g/ j5 r% p. M/ |3 j. | G CWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
; [7 i- A8 B8 A$ Q% e$ m5 }/ fHolmes: You did.* U% M3 ?0 U; i# y
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
8 {! @! ?0 Q6 W1 n$ uHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.- } T V7 T7 t% R' F" A
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D0 s# ~2 C. B& B; C宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ( L; l2 G% J9 O- b, P- l
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.
/ V' p# }8 f) r( ZHolmes: Granted.
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/ W) {: n3 F' n" l. M# T晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 6 P' p c+ r* n$ n* q( A& [' H
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) ( ? J) M L2 [+ T
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' A M! k' E! c$ b6 V, y拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。 0 {3 j; i$ F, u# J, p
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Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
S3 {7 K( {- j( o* o( s3 |Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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; q8 o7 g5 X$ t0 E+ b/ g7 w8 fHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 ! N, _! ^- Q- j- E
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% w$ ~1 [# e5 X# c" Y$ _4 PBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 - g, |; M- O' U
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' s9 J0 A l2 |Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。 5 a# }$ n" x7 Q1 _, {8 y
( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
# `4 Q- `7 g Y; p3 j9 i0 M- ]Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?9 x( y# e" D6 x6 P- `. L6 c# H
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。)
2 Q. V( Y8 |. X5 V/ z0 K- Z; BIrene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。 - Y% i! c6 x+ |
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) / |* I, ?% F$ [" K9 y1 s
Watson: Get that out of my face.+ U9 ]; k5 @5 I8 |" H) Y
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.: i7 ~! u3 q' o+ G9 M1 P0 s' j) C7 j
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.% C6 a8 ]& c# z, l( ^
路人警官 Clarky上场。 5 G) h' W; ]% u& f/ z) n- S
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.2 _- |3 _# h6 R" Q4 q
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) , L5 y9 H* E8 d3 G# q: x
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
) I! Z2 P; L) g! W8 w; [Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?
% w4 \+ L- F6 T& ]Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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0 @; K! _: a7 n1 s# T/ l) |墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
% [5 c' u% g: n: m* g* u( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。) 1 K4 L3 j1 U- u" m, l" o
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
3 ]2 e' x: M ^3 J& H# Q( lWatson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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6 ]0 {" D/ X! c) v; h5 u河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 2 r6 B5 Q) D7 e( ~. t5 U: N: S! e7 }
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
! x$ i" i/ A6 I9 T+ j/ C# u) ?" RBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
: I# U! \/ t1 }& _Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) ! g& S) M, L1 b9 b% ]- i1 B
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。 2 c$ u$ V L( q3 ^ @
Holmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) 8 E0 ?( g$ E/ L# h- r& Y
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
) Z+ A3 b8 x L5 X$ Z( p# y0 THolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
$ d' [/ y7 d- WLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.1 p" w, e. H+ a9 M
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 9 ^4 `& ^/ m# z A+ k
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。 . _3 ~" Y( M5 H1 A! |. d% E! j
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 7 P, f. i" }! I6 K6 o
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
, V' o( |$ h: @' QHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
) @2 ?4 R/ W5 t1 q8 J& C1 YMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
- X5 P# ]) w1 x2 Y- O% L5 BWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)
5 N4 @0 P7 B4 `& L3 W0 [Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)
* j7 A0 t, }; K& JWatson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
3 h1 o% h0 a+ V' l7 [ |+ [4 D+ [Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) 5 u1 N+ A3 S( `; f4 i3 _+ Y
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
# C1 ~3 d8 G, x- k* w; wMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
" w/ K6 `6 c! b( z& d$ E7 x1 z( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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