 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 ' ~+ e1 P, w3 |
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/ K5 ?* Y1 y+ U8 Y影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 6 s$ [" S7 i2 R- [0 U
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。) , w. S* m5 [0 Y! S& ?3 ^# w
Holmes: I just picked it up.1 m( _+ e E+ Z
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
$ E% \3 u& Q# _- JHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
" y5 i" \0 o* V/ lWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
( L0 q) O: \1 v6 nHolmes: You did.
( v7 `( N6 A* k6 x" Y1 e(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 3 W3 k( x" i1 n- ~, i) }
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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* \6 \2 N% b7 Z' D2 h宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 " i4 ^' f# _" w& e
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.! d: G0 R, I( N ?) g( @ }: `
Holmes: Granted.2 U/ _$ ]9 X* C) z
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 2 e- I$ [" a. T) M) \1 h8 p1 t. Y; s
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。) % W& K6 e2 z b+ v
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拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Z `+ M% U Q1 t. q, d+ |$ ~Watson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
) o% L- N" p9 e1 u2 o) ]Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 . W. F/ E* h7 O" H
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. k& F) S& D7 l! A# ?; ^' k) uBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 7 L) ^1 m% {$ [4 l" Q5 K
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' n2 n/ i- k1 R5 r7 K- ^Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
0 w1 y; ]0 d& g+ o: t( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措) $ D v' S; E$ X- e
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?
; h9 I1 R' W$ I7 x- p4 c- x4 ?Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) : H# ~3 c4 Z: f; i8 {, J/ ?
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.% w& q6 u# _4 Q0 v1 `
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3 U4 ]* i8 {2 u, TIrene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
$ |( ?: C. ~* OHolmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。) ) G( |2 k7 o7 P; m7 I+ d' |
Watson: Get that out of my face.
1 k* T0 Q( d/ F( ~% v% gHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.$ A, F* g$ i: G( V) Q! Z1 `4 z
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.
' ^) J( v. p0 c e& y4 H路人警官 Clarky上场。
5 M, ]' \0 u ?Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.
! p# u2 Y- f: J5 E& H( v$ YHolmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。) . n4 b% u, q1 T
得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 & x& Y& |6 Z6 q5 \4 H2 Z
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?, c/ ?$ h; Q3 K1 j
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.1 ~! S% H' ~/ y/ |+ r1 R* ?) A
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$ E& w- s6 r& s3 E3 V% Y3 k墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
$ U, e" L+ T2 |, A" I1 J3 z" n. k( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
! a) ]. F* b2 [6 Z6 |( j. rHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.! z% L& g4 ~, X# s( G
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。) 9 `' Z6 P+ r2 c: F1 t
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# \5 m$ n5 r2 d" S河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。
" L, K: q& U: M* C: |* B: c; I" fHolmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)
1 J7 v) B; A- l& A. S$ T$ sBlackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
* V2 U1 ^) X6 IWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 4 |0 f# d* b' @# z p- X5 @
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
$ L# K: C% x" p! n! N* XHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
5 i* r& G5 C# f8 X后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。 ( C6 Z- T+ i! _8 _) r
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)
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+ Q, W8 j, K8 b1 g- |警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 2 _' _8 ~% t! f5 X$ T+ b/ Q& s- L
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing. c/ J9 c: d! a6 z) x8 ~% R
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0 X l" @: I3 Z( b$ E: }接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 " V0 T9 a+ f3 K& C, q. i5 g! R
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
/ S+ g- n8 R1 o. rHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) 7 V2 S( s$ L7 s+ J
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。) 3 J8 b8 s& c3 ~9 U! @$ _$ ~1 ~
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。)
* t1 v9 [- ?+ J: k8 `Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
. N/ a- n) ]: a7 A. q/ JWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) - N6 ~$ a# w7 e9 g( j) a0 K3 S
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) 0 z& z: O# M; v! [
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
% q) T7 ^. _# `( S4 ]Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。) . t" w8 l- g0 {
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)
B! @; R9 E$ i6 RMary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。) % v1 F: h5 R) ?$ K+ y0 T% Y
( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) : \$ E& S1 g' ~* u1 s0 P
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总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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