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《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

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洋扬 发表于 2010-3-19 02:24:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是Holmes,不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay" l: \6 _+ f5 p8 u
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影片开头,Holmes启动Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的ShrelockWatson一同制服了另一杂兵。
4 M1 ~/ [" ?0 C8 {: t' KWatson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
3 _* `4 F3 o* x. iHolmes: I just picked it up.9 ?* v- j# K5 K
Watson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。)
$ M, L! y- n7 YHolmes: Knew I forgot something.
" R4 ^9 E4 V$ `  J5 Z0 v2 ]Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
2 S2 Z, Y! E* H. S; NHolmes: You did.
$ N9 i1 t! ^. n) j% W& v+ Y(注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。)
7 q2 ^6 A8 O0 k! q) f1 w  Z$ [! ~Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。WatsonHolmes的房门。8 x1 v6 u5 W% H# U7 Q! |9 b
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.# u) ?$ k6 t4 {: c4 u4 C
Holmes: Granted.
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晚餐桌上,吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。
' Z: D. s; N! Q2 g" z% NWatson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词:very mature。)
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- y. M- _' K" @* `+ c拳击场那段(Holmes启动Combo Strike之前)的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。/ ~, U- s' ~$ C! S: I6 ?) n
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WatsonHolmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。8 c, `: u- a4 b+ |2 ^3 v5 M& R  C
Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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Holmes去见Blackwood时,Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。% a( M# h7 F6 i
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Blackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。$ D" y/ l# i2 Z( }) J! W
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. f2 f8 N3 i" ~Irene(就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终boss)的委托来见Holmes' `7 `+ l4 R% a
Irene掏信,Holmes惊慌失措); q( z. D3 V7 F/ ~0 c3 [* P2 o
Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?. v5 _# t. Y8 R' d* L6 F
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。): x/ E% e# v+ F) \- W" K
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.  u  J6 z. W/ r* X2 Q5 t# z
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Irene离开,Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕IreneHolmes,建议Holmes远离麻烦(leave the case alone)。9 x' ?: y# l9 [8 m* T
Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。)( {6 ~/ k4 N7 }9 ?8 J" H5 w2 |* k
Watson: Get that out of my face.
1 ~; L( D' \4 y4 e& r/ f% x% cHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
7 \0 W( d% V: g9 U( FWatson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.6 ?/ |+ Z* y7 x. g9 j) m
路人警官Clarky上场。
' u. s/ u' n$ t# T' |: `Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.: N! L/ O' i- }" `* Y2 @
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)  n& O: `- V  z) r  r0 O
得知Blackwood死而复活后,Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。
  P5 K' f  J, v: ^Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?. b& V" G; [: ~! j
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.6 u% t# d" v; J. H* X1 A
10.
5 Y$ ^. V+ Q( u: U墓地勘查后,Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母,Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
; v- H5 W# C& o" j  y% o: j& KWatson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。): @1 q7 t5 e, f+ g
Holmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.9 D! @8 W2 C. X: i
Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)! C- Y6 J) z% U- `
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河边屠宰场,Blackwood13地出场后。
) U( m% V- R# N2 b' g& _9 e4 \Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。)3 r+ D; q3 Y: ?3 N
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…8 ~: W! Z- T) g4 r% U/ P
Watson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。), g5 Z- {! o$ c: B6 Z/ O3 G! R
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了SherckIrene
- |0 z  [% O8 [3 cHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。)
2 t$ |) F9 V- h; F( G6 p" ^后来解Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。, P# D) X+ j. ]1 s
Holmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。)8 d7 [/ s7 K: I7 y
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警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。
0 Q. t1 `0 |8 [8 U# p* `Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。  o9 e6 u; a! P+ f% b- G; J6 H
话说Watson和未婚妻MaryHolmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。* `) b" ~( Z9 `- x" Z* l
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟WatsonBut it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示Watson放他下来。)Good afternoon, dear. (向Mary问好。)! Q+ [) Q* a4 w; @
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
9 f2 w9 S+ z. O+ Y8 Q' r% \' CHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示Watson放他下来。)
. h* T" {3 e# @6 d% `; Q8 Z2 }Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?& t+ B, K9 d0 a
Watson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。)- u' Z. n" c( r% a' c
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。)' _9 \/ U2 J& ^( D. a4 }
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。)
$ n+ ?! A( M8 k; X2 IHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)* O; p9 h" t  n2 _! d1 ^6 Y' w
Watson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。)4 k  y- ?) v: V  U$ \. K; U' h7 l" H9 H
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)- ?! r+ l9 j  r$ l  G
WatsonHolmes放了下来。)
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总之,这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……

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