《夏洛克 福尔摩斯》吐糟与彩蛋选

没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。（比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。）在这个故事里，没头脑是Holmes，不高兴是Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是gay。
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2 S  T2 \& d8 O' \) m1 o4 Y  v影片开头，Holmes启动Combo发大招，从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的Shrelock和Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。% T, z- e3 `6 m+ n& B$ x5 B
Watson: I like the hat. （吐糟开始。）5 h4 P- r9 n" [4 F7 F
Holmes: I just picked it up.
* u2 V% Q  ?- r+ s0 ]Watson: You remember your revolver? （显然没有。）- }- _- k; H& G' I1 U5 B6 e5 v. I. A! l
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.
# _. P, X2 d7 k! C+ ]" p, }0 HWatson: I thought I’d left the stove on. （吐糟继续。）5 `) ?# W0 N2 c  {
Holmes: You did.; a% N, ]  O* q) D9 E
（注意到Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子，吐糟。）
  ^+ p) C; Z, o9 I4 RHolmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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宅了N久的Holmes在实验手枪消音器（该不会因为Watson的新欢吧），枪声吓坏了Watson的新房东和女管家。Watson敲Holmes的房门。2 G- q0 V% d2 H$ M" d$ V: ?1 b
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.1 p+ h. C5 S0 b* J
Holmes: Granted.0 O  D& {- P, S
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2 Q) e0 y- G- F& E, I晚餐桌上，吃醋的Holmes气走Watson的未婚妻（女性）后。
+ l8 M# u8 b. P/ U+ ]$ D  `Watson: Well done, old boy. （潜台词：very mature。）/ V2 d8 N5 U0 {) K6 C- a0 _
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拳击场那段（Holmes启动Combo Strike之前）的插曲是”Rocky Road to Dublin”，是一首19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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Watson带Holmes去见Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作，发生在Watson得知Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
  {4 ?0 Q& _" T8 b. D/ C: S2 kWatson: And what happens if I do this? （掀开瓶子，用手杖敲了敲，把虫子全放跑了。）
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Holmes去见Blackwood时，Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的（好吧，信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的）《约翰默示录》的一章，《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是Lord忽悠。8 q3 F) l7 }- X( [
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& a" w/ I* q0 D7 H$ y+ K$ w) l- pBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。
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Irene（就是Holmes仰慕的那个女贼）带着Moriarty（莫利亚蒂教授，福尔摩斯系列的最终boss）的委托来见Holmes。
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Irene: Why are you always so suspicious?: N1 E/ ~8 d# H. G3 z% w, s7 [0 d5 c
Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? （这次轮到Holmes不高兴了。）6 n1 }+ E4 k) n! T; C
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.
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Irene离开，Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后Watson上场，玩儿命吐糟仰慕Irene的Holmes，建议Holmes远离麻烦（leave the case alone）。
' I8 B6 e9 U9 T; |Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. （醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着Watson。）5 i, O% ]+ s  n$ r
Watson: Get that out of my face.
5 V8 N- x* S0 @3 z9 kHolmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.
9 B" n; G3 d- \( G( e1 c9 [Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.$ [% K8 c- g+ v* v+ B
路人警官Clarky上场。0 Q  b. ]; \- V9 \6 N
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once.$ q. c; Z3 ~, m$ j2 j9 w) B) d
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. （面对伦敦警察，一种智力的优越感油然而生。）
& n! @. N& J) v: g; b8 \得知Blackwood死而复活后，Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。' B6 J# H/ T, n; G5 H( C5 I4 g
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?6 D& s4 Q- S4 o. ]. f' ~
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后，Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场，诋毁Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。Waston去见未婚妻及父母，Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
7 q$ e% X: r7 z' }5 Y# m2 `（Watson一脚踹开Holmes要撬的门。）
0 z  I2 _4 W6 g- t2 y8 UHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
& i, m  J- ~8 P0 K. f% }& [Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. （我们管这叫傲娇。）- \" h( p0 H5 t6 |) `1 P4 R
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% B* [+ [, j8 J- k6 z5 C河边屠宰场，Blackwood装13地出场后。
8 K+ K: T. `4 P, |. \Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. （吐糟。）* C6 O3 f' {" }) G1 k  T; |# t
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
1 A& p+ L/ n7 ~9 AWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. （再吐。）& w. a- q) i$ r/ p% ]$ K
死亡机器开动，火焰包围了Sherck和Irene。
/ f* z0 v% a% o/ bHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson （其实快被烤焦了。）
+ K; ^  I" e$ G/ P3 B/ D0 w后来解Watson的皮带（挂在链子上增大阻力）。0 I$ W* A' H: ], X$ `" ?
Holmes: Don’t get excited. （汗。）
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6 P, M. M# X- Y7 p$ c: t% E警官逮捕被通缉的Holmes，看到地上推理用的画符（顺便说一句，那作案顺序实在太古典了）。
: P2 u* F9 {! n( m2 R  j* rLestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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+ o" g5 {& ~! Q: S* f& p3 {接下来的吐糟点不多了，因为故事要收尾了。直到Blackwood死亡之后，才有了新笑点。对了，决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。
6 ?% N2 `* b, Y' D话说Watson和未婚妻Mary向Holmes道别，发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。4 }5 x- c9 p+ q5 }8 x9 F
Holmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. （吐糟Watson）But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. （暗示Watson放他下来。）Good afternoon, dear. （向Mary问好。）- b5 b& b" L, Q( J% g; _
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. （淡定。）. f; Y! s0 z* I6 d" g
Holmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. （再次暗示Watson放他下来。）
! p6 Q/ x2 _* R: d; G. aMary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
1 A$ M$ @: ^6 r3 {# i2 G* LWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. （淡定。）
. a# M( u( V3 E# r1 nHolmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? （开始求饶。）( j8 D/ f8 z- T2 Y$ W9 U6 V
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? （这回的吐糟是比xxx还淡定。）! n+ d! m' A% J9 l8 [3 ]; e
Holmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. （看来真的挺不住了。）
6 j' `: O5 d" X" L7 F" C# T/ qWatson: Worse things have happened. （得理不饶人。）
8 l1 X, s/ E' `$ `- M4 QMary: John. （未婚妻看不下去了。）
6 }* U% Y/ ]# v3 S8 \% i# v（Watson把Holmes放了下来。）
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6 P: O7 l6 f2 h3 Q( F" C5 ]5 Y总之，这个故事讲的是Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手Watson，一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的Moriarty，暗示大家还会有第二部，第三部……