 | |  |  | 没头脑与不高兴是艺术作品中必不可少的要素。(比较狭义的说法是天然呆和傲娇。)在这个故事里,没头脑是 Holmes,不高兴是 Watson。看过电影的一半以上的群众认为他们不是 gay。 8 S }& h: Y7 z2 x0 Z3 C
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- w8 E( N( H3 m/ b/ u4 A' T" I2 h影片开头, Holmes启动 Combo发大招,从杂兵哪里缴获掉落物品帽子一顶。随后潜伏在二楼的 Shrelock和 Watson一同制服了另一杂兵。 , L c0 W1 b3 s
Watson: I like the hat. (吐糟开始。)
$ O# @! y+ u* H( hHolmes: I just picked it up.
3 W6 _: `% Y' I7 {' nWatson: You remember your revolver? (显然没有。) : W& v0 } S/ n6 U; J! U7 Y R: k; r
Holmes: Knew I forgot something.( j8 H# j( _0 x8 u/ }$ {
Watson: I thought I’d left the stove on. (吐糟继续。)
3 D3 a- s B2 ~Holmes: You did.7 k/ }( Q* Q1 b4 O, x* ^& ]' Z
(注意到 Watson还在掐杂兵的脖子,吐糟。) 7 z5 X l, q, `( y
Holmes: I think that’s quite enough. You’re a doctor, after all.
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, P. w( e; _- U3 F9 }宅了 N久的 Holmes在实验手枪消音器(该不会因为 Watson的新欢吧),枪声吓坏了 Watson的新房东和女管家。 Watson敲 Holmes的房门。 ; a# |1 `4 a# W) I5 C( N, Z+ M" I
Watson: Permission to enter the armory.& `+ p- n* F* G, V
Holmes: Granted.# ], m9 V2 ~5 D
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6 M- B2 o- i( O2 W晚餐桌上,吃醋的 Holmes气走 Watson的未婚妻(女性)后。 ! x% d, [( j) n% H. c
Watson: Well done, old boy. (潜台词: very mature。)
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; D& c+ P7 l6 A# u; ^ y+ F4 X拳击场那段( Holmes启动 Combo Strike之前)的插曲是 ”Rocky Road to Dublin”,是一首 19世纪时的爱尔兰民谣。
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- c5 r, r4 Q, G' ^5 EWatson带 Holmes去见 Blackwood之前。这段吐糟其实是一个动作,发生在 Watson得知 Holmes蛋疼地捉了六小时虫子之后。
8 |# ^* q& ~% ]8 W4 e! \Watson: And what happens if I do this? (掀开瓶子,用手杖敲了敲,把虫子全放跑了。)
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7 Q3 a8 e/ b) J4 L3 j6 D& nHolmes去见 Blackwood时, Blackwood嘟囔的是地球人都知道的(好吧,信上帝的人和看过漫画《怪物》的人都知道的)《约翰默示录》的一章,《从海里来的兽》。从这时起我就知道这位仁兄是 Lord忽悠。 8 l* w& x7 T( i# H# D0 Y4 t
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+ t! r. J) M G0 {9 {$ A2 zBlackwood死前的遗言是地球人都知道的一句电影台词。 ) [( H5 v& L9 n* t# l7 N ]9 g0 p2 [
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Irene(就是 Holmes仰慕的那个女贼)带着 Moriarty(莫利亚蒂教授,福尔摩斯系列的最终 boss)的委托来见 Holmes。
, P Z3 Q4 p; | N' S( Irene掏信, Holmes惊慌失措)
/ @" j, K/ _' d% ^9 ZIrene: Why are you always so suspicious?
$ h& l* p E( f! T4 GHolmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically? (这次轮到 Holmes不高兴了。) - \! b5 f1 G' P+ Y* e7 @5 @2 N
Irene: Careful not to cut yourself on this lethal envelope.% `& B- ]3 f: O+ O
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Irene离开, Holmes傲娇地弹一种琴。之后 Watson上场,玩儿命吐糟仰慕 Irene的 Holmes,建议 Holmes远离麻烦( leave the case alone)。
5 W x) n8 L9 F# z/ j: _Holmes: Well, I may not have a choice, Hmm? After all, I may be paying the rent alone soon, thanks to you. (醋意盎然地拿琴弓指着 Watson。)
0 ~0 F6 z5 G& }" d, I; ]3 U: e: DWatson: Get that out of my face., P/ c4 W4 Z' l. J9 A
Holmes: It’s not in your face. It’s in my hand.! A7 ~4 C7 {/ @
Watson: Get what is in your hand out of my face.: M! r6 W. d3 m/ s
路人警官 Clarky上场。 : w+ k+ N* G) T$ O* Z
Clarky: Sir, Inspector Lestrade asks that you come with me at once./ ?! P/ |2 S& a' T# M* S8 X9 F
Holmes: What’s he done now? Lost his way to Scotland Yard? Watson, grab a compass. (面对伦敦警察,一种智力的优越感油然而生。)
9 o* H; ]) T: S- ~得知 Blackwood死而复活后, Holmes拼命拉老相好下水。 - I' ]4 }' E5 C8 ?$ U( G
Watson: You’re not taking this seriously, are you Holmes?- ?1 |+ N4 a* M+ q! ]
Holmes: Yes. As you should. It’s a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can’t tell if a man is dead or not.
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墓地勘查后, Holmes雇佣的吉普赛女人上场,诋毁 Watson的未婚妻。两人不欢而散。 Waston去见未婚妻及父母, Holmes独自调查死者的住处。
! z! M$ G) X" Q, V8 U9 O( Watson一脚踹开 Holmes要撬的门。)
) }( Q6 K" Z: `2 i7 VHolmes: It does make a considerable difference to me having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely.
: P3 }8 X9 a5 G9 @Watson: Well, you can rely on me for exactly 10 minutes. (我们管这叫傲娇。)
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河边屠宰场, Blackwood装 13地出场后。 # h, \0 k2 o8 Y8 b; A# D9 a
Holmes: What a busy afterlife you are having. (吐糟。) $ z: \( E+ b1 }# W: f, h
Blackwood: I want you to be my witness. Tomorrow, at midday, the world as you know it…
4 g' W7 E* c0 e( B. I* c/ G9 ?0 K1 c3 kWatson: Show me your face and it will be the end of your world right now. (再吐。) 4 N5 y( A8 k2 }6 N/ I9 R% M
死亡机器开动,火焰包围了 Sherck和 Irene。
+ i! u6 ?6 \) OHolmes: It’s warm in here, Watson (其实快被烤焦了。) # U+ ^: P; i. ~7 D8 K) E- h' o
后来解 Watson的皮带(挂在链子上增大阻力)。
+ {8 w( \+ _9 y% s9 YHolmes: Don’t get excited. (汗。) 3 D9 \/ E6 A! S$ C; L; T6 m
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警官逮捕被通缉的 Holmes,看到地上推理用的画符(顺便说一句,那作案顺序实在太古典了)。 * ?- g" K, G& K/ R; _
Lestrade: Hello hello hello. Did the d turn up? Well…Never mind. You got the next best thing.
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接下来的吐糟点不多了,因为故事要收尾了。直到 Blackwood死亡之后,才有了新笑点。对了,决斗的那个未完工的大桥就是后来的伦敦塔大桥。据说 Blackwood这个人物也是有原形的。管他呢。 & r- N8 N9 v2 S t w- c4 {6 z
话说 Watson和未婚妻 Mary向 Holmes道别,发现了伪装上吊的大侦探。
$ I+ w" |( i/ w) Z m% K G: AHolmes: I was trying to deduce the manner in which Blackwood survived his execution. Clearing our good names as well. (吐糟 Watson) But it had a surprising supporous effect on me, and I was carried off in the arms of Morpheus. Like a caterpillar in a cocoon. (暗示 Watson放他下来。) Good afternoon, dear. (向 Mary问好。) * I& {; a4 ]2 j: h6 V& M1 a
Watson: Get on with it, Holmes. (淡定。)
7 J: L' ?4 @# i+ ?2 P6 GHolmes: Cleverly concealed in the hangman’s knot was a hook. Oh dear, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down. (再次暗示 Watson放他下来。) * e: G; Y' R( Z4 n4 o
Mary: John, shouldn’t we help him down?
9 }6 B8 j3 k" Q, D. yWatson: No, no, no, I hate to cut him off midstream. Carry on. (淡定。) * q N$ N& j( ~- a
Holmes: Uh, look, the executioner attached it to a harness thus allowing the weight to be distributed around the waist to remain intact. Oh, my lord, I can’t feel my ch s. Might we continue this at ground level? (开始求饶。) ( E G2 x1 F/ b( }# a& C
Watson: How did you manage it, Holmes? (这回的吐糟是比 xxx还淡定。)
/ b% c4 t, l. yHolmes: I have managed it with braces, belts, and a coat hook. Please, Watson, my tongue is growing cold and I’ll be no use to you at all. (看来真的挺不住了。)
. g7 k. m7 t% B. f- UWatson: Worse things have happened. (得理不饶人。) 6 h. Q) `$ ?6 e `6 x; y1 \% {8 x& M
Mary: John. (未婚妻看不下去了。)
, z4 A8 K% C' q, |( Watson把 Holmes放了下来。) % Q7 u, R' c- M2 Y* Y
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, q0 `/ w7 H6 T! U" r总之,这个故事讲的是 Holmes为了挽回要与他人结婚的助手 Watson,一哭二闹三上吊并顺便解决了一个案子的激情四溢的故事。故事结尾出现的 Moriarty,暗示大家还会有第二部,第三部……
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